The fireworks and introduction sequence play for Mayhem, before we open to the hellish-themed arena at the MCI Center...

Signs in the crowd tonight:

"Get W-E-Double L S-Double O-N D-O-Double G!" "David Flair beat up my Grandma" "Mikey: Self-controlled or just stupid?" "Akiko 'Who's Next?'" "Hey Scott--Got Beer?" "A Hardyz Fan Ate The Guy Who Had This Sign" "Nova's farts are stronger than any hurricane" "<< WUSUPWIDAT?" "WE WANT PEPSI!" "Molly: Hot Stacey: Hotter Kaye: HOTTEST!"

We then cut to the announcer's desk, where Megan Eko and Paul Heyman are sitting in. Heyman is wearing a Generation NEXT hat and Megan...is back to wearing a lady's suit.

Megan: Welcome everyone to EAW Wednesday Night Mayhem! I'm Megan Eko, and this is Paul Heyman, and we're LIVE from our nation's capital in the MCI Center! Oh...and I am no longer going to hock any Generation NEXT merchandise, for them welcoming David Flair into the fold. :P

Paul: I can't see why not. I think it's the best damn thing to ever happen to them!

Megan: Well, I certainly don't. I was going along for it just for the little bit of extra cash, but I'm not about to promote David Flair in any way.

Paul: Ah...too bad...ANYWAY you can STILL check out all the great Generation NEXT merchandise on the EAW website, the EAW merchandise catalouge--which you can get free by dialing 555-EAWSTUFF!

Megan: But Paul's still stickin' in there. :P

Paul: You're damn right...

"Back The F*** Up" by Fear Factory begins to play...

Capetta: Our first match is scheduled for one fall and is under EXTREME RULES! Introducing first, residingin Amityville, New Yorker...he stands 6'3" and weighs in at 235 lbs! Ladies and gentlemen...BULLWHIP!!

Megan: Bullwhip is, of course, a blood brother of Chainsaw. And was the CAPW champion when he beat MAIKU. Tonight will be his first ever match in the EAW, scheduled to face quite an opponent in Spazz.

Paul: Yeah, and he'll also get his first EAW loss tonight, too! Spazz is a rough enough opponent as it is...but under EXTREME RULES?! Forget it!

Megan: Well, both of them consider themselves major badasses, so neither of them are going home happy tonight. Nevertheless, that will for sure net us a brutal, competitive match.

Bullwhip gets into the ring, then "How I Could Just Kill a Man" by Rage Against the Machine cues up...

Capetta: And his opponent, from Albany, New York in the PWF dimension..he stands 5'11 and weighs in at 296 pounds...the Human Powerbomb Machine...Spaaaaaaaaaaazz!!

Spazz walks out onto the stage, looking like his usual pissed-off self, and stomping down to the ring.

Megan: Neither of these two seem to have brought any weapons to the ring. But Spazz usually doesn't make use of them anyway...although he may find them to come in handy at times. And Bullwhip tends to stash them around the ring before his match...

Paul: Well, I'm sure this match won't dissapoint, and it'll even show that moron Rob Black what Extreme is all about...

*ding, ding*

As soon as the bell rings, the two start slugging it out with stiff rights. Spazz goes behind, Hammerlock Slamming Bullwhip, and crossface punching him. Bullwhip covers up and rolls over on his back--decking Spazz back and fighting his way back up to his knees. Bullwhip sends him to the ropes...ducks a clothesline by Spazz, and locks on a sleeper...Spazz tries to shake him free, but Bullwhip turns in into a suplex. He covers Spazz but only gets a one count. Spazz up...a diving double leg takedown from Spazz. Spazz peppers Bullwhip with right hands again, then rolls over to his side and locks on an Armbar. Bullwhip fights his way over to the ropes to get back up to his feet, and kicks away at Spazz until he gets Spazz to release it. Bullwhip rolls out to the outside. Spazz follows, and catches upwith Bullwhip, slugging away on him, then hitting a short double underhook powerbomb on the outside. He pulls apart the steel stairs and starts wailing away on him with the steel stairs, especially at his upper back. He sets up upper portion of the stairs upward on the outside, then picks up Bullwhip, and hits a short powerbomb onto them, before hooking the leg. One! Two! But a kickout by Bullwhip

Spazz picks up Bullwhip and sets him up for another powerbomb--Bullwhip manages to back body drop him...Spazz up...and Bullwhip suplexes him onto the steel stairs. Bullwhip pulls a GLASS TABLE from under the ring, setting it up on its side. As Spazz gets up...

Paul: GOOOOOOOORE!!! GOOOOOOOOORE!!!! GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!!!

Megan: I believe we're required to have you spout that line at least once per broadcast. :P

Cover by Bullwhip, gets a two count, but Bullwhip picks up a shard of the glass table and punches Spazz with it, causing it to shatter. Bullwhip rakes the eyes as Spazz begins to juice. Spazz is the victim of some body shots by Bullwhip, then Bullwhip sets him up for a side slam--hits it. He grabs a larger shard of the table, then is about to slam it against his knee when Spazz sits up and decks him in the midsection, He then lays the shard across the safety railing and ATOMIC DROPS Bullwhip onto it! Bullwhip falls into the crowd, and Spazz chases after him.

The two slug it out in the crowd, with Spazz using some wires to help him nearly choke Bullwhip into submission. Bullwhip escapes, and hogties Spazz with them, stomping away at the gut of Spazz. Spazz slips out of them, then drags Bullwhip to the backstage area and Powerbomb him onto and THROUGH a table, but not quite getting the three count. Bullwhip comes back, slugging at Spazz with all he has and then ramming him face-first repeatedly into a pay phone, so much that change begins to falls out of it. Spazz returns the favor, then chokes him with the phone cord, then rakes it along his face. Bullwhip's busted open, and Spazz force-feeds Bullwhip some of the change, decking him in the mouth at afterward. Bullwhip spits them out, and tosses Spazz into the back of a truck, slamming the door down across his chest. Spazz matches to shove it back upward, and then DDTs Bullwhip. He hits a face-first Crucifix Powerbomb, then picks up Bullwhip, signalling he'll put him away...

Megan: Spazz...HITTING THE SIX FEET UNDER!! Cover now...

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ONE!

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TWO!!!

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THREE!!!

*ding, ding*!

Paul: YES!!!

Megan: And Spazz coming away with the victory! Although the crowd not exactly giving him a winner's reception.

Paul: They're just jealous...and feel a little too safe. If they were face-to-face with him on the streets, they'd be the biggest Spazz fans you ever saw.

Megan: And Bullwhip getting up to his feet as Spazz celebrates...and--Bullwhip attacking Spazz!!

Paul: You can stop a match between these two, but you can't stop a fight between them!!

Megan: Low blow from Bullwhip...set up now..a TIGER DRIVER 91!!...TWICE...THREE TIMES!! And a Death Valley Driver from there!!

The crowd cheers after Bullwhip's attack on Spazz.

Megan: And Bullwhip turning out to be a sore loser..but the crowd loving him for it...

Paul: But if Spazz did it, they'd be screaming for his head, wouldn't they?!

Megan: Hm...that I don't doubt.

Paul: Bah...

Megan: Stay with us...!

**Commercial Break**

"Cherry Bomb" by Shonen Knife cues up just as we return from break.

Megan: Welcome everyone back to Wednesday Night Mayhem! Up next Akiko is scheduled to take on...well...to be honest, she was to face Kane, but instead, there's a replacement to be scheduled...and I have no idea who it is.

Paul: Well, that I can understand, but they haven't even let ME in on the surprise! ME?! Paul F'N Heyman!!

Megan: Probably because they know you will spill it anyway, and you didn't really NEED to know...

Capetta: The following match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Osaka, Japan: she stands 5'6' and weighs in at 135 lbs. Introducing...AKIKO NAKANO!!

The crowd cheers as Akiko comes out, waving to the fans and mugging for the camera.

Paul: Ugh...I just can't STAND this girl. What an egotistical, loud-mouthed, annoying--

Megan: I guess like-repels-like. :P

Paul: I PROTEST!

Megan: I have to deal with this all the time, folks. Be glad you don't have to.

Akiko hits the ring, and her music fades out...

A theme sounding straight out of Jaws begins to play...

Paul: WHAT?! Could it be...John Tenta?

Megan: Well--actually...not QUITE...

Appearing in the entranceway is...

Capetta: And her opponent, from the Atlantic Ocean...he stands 5'10" and weighs in at 180 pounds. Ladies and gentlemen...SHARK BOY!!

Megan: ....Shark Boy?

Paul: SHARK BOY!!!!

Megan: Well, it seems the last minute substitution for Kane is none other than independent wrestler Shark Boy.

Paul: Wonderful restatement of the obvious, Einstein. :P But is it the REAL Shark Boy or a reasonable facsimile?

Megan: That appears to be the real deal to me...Shark Boy getting in the ring, and quite a reaction from this crowd...and Akiko seems rather stunned...

Paul: FROM FEAR!!

Megan: I don't know about that...but Shark Boy set to lock up with Akiko...and here we go!

Megan: Shark Boy and Akiko tying up--Akiko to the ropes--SPINNING HEEL KICK on Shark Boy! Akiko kippups, and a somersault leg drop on Shark Boy! Cover!

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ONE!

Kickout!

And Akiko firmly in control. Shark Boy sent to the corner--charging it--OH, but drops Akiko face-first onto the top turnbuckle! A springboard--DROPKICK to the back on Akiko--who spills out to the outsi--but grabbing onto the top rope!!...Shark Boy moving on for the attack--HEADBUTT to the midsection of Shark Boy! Akiko flipping over the back of Shark Boy...

Paul: To the ropes--and--SHARK BOY catches her off the ropes with an incredible Tilt a Whirl Backbreaker!! Akiko favoring the back, and Shark Boy getting in some hard kicks to the back! He's like a...um...shark that smells blood!

Megan: Shark Boy setting up Akiko now--Snap Suplex! Pick up now...another set up...BRAIN BUSTER by Shark Boy!!

Paul: Akiko dazed...but back up?! Well, you can't bust what you don't have. AKIKO WITH A ROLL UP!

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ONE!

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TWO!--Kickout!

Megan: Akiko up...DROP TOE HOLD by SHARK BOY! Elbowdrop on her now...Shark Boy now...off the ropes...DIVING DROPKICK to the back of Akiko!

Paul: And a clear focus from Shark Boy now. Baby ain't gonna have much back when Shark Boy finishes making a meal of her.

Megan: Shark Boy going up top now...Akiko crawling into the ring now--and a CROSS BODY by Shark Boy now on Akiko!!

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ONE!

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Tw--NO!

Paul: Shark Boy off the ropes now--Akiko up--back body dr--No, Shark Boy landing behind her...

Megan: Shark Boy setting up Akiko for a Reverse Suplex--NO!! Akiko landing behind Shark Boy, Dragon Sleeper position now--set up--OSAKA SNIPER!! Akiko covering Shark Boy...

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ONE!

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TWO!!

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THREE!!!

Paul: NOOOOOO!! DAMNIT!...An excellent showing by indy sensation Shark Boy, but ultimately Akiko pulling off the victory in a close match.

Megan: I wouldn't call it "close." :P

Akiko's hand is raised as "Cherry Bomb" cues up again...

Megan: We'll be back after this short break, folks! Rash versus Kaye for the Triple Crown Title!

**Commercial Break**

Megan: Well…continuing on the card tonight…wait, getting word…we're getting cut off?

Heyman: I think I remember hearing about this. Megan, we're about to get a chance to rest at the request of one of our superstars.

Megan: Great…I can't believe I'm saying this…but we now take you to…ugh…Mean Gene Okerlund and Bobby "The Brain" Hennan

The camera changes position just slightly, and gets a slightly older look on it.

Gene: All right ladies and gentlemen, what a night we're having here in the MCI Center, and it can only get bigger. Mean Gene Okerlund here along side Bobby "The Brain" Heenan, and Bobby, we are about to have an interesting match here.

Bobby: It's great to know we're about to be joined by a great wrestler in a few minutes, as David Flair is going for a special surprise challenge.

"My Way" starts to cue up over the speakers, and out from the entryway comes David Flair, with Kelly. David has the MPRW Regional Heritage Championship belt around his waist, and Kelly is wearing a sexy gold dress.

Gene: Well, here comes the MPRW Champion David Flair, and Kelly is looking lovely tonight, isn't she Brain?

Bobby: She sure is, and I'm proud to know personally this man who's coming out. He's the only man in wrestling that reminds me of my protegees.

Gene: How so?

Bobby: He knows that a win's a win, no matter how you get it.

Gene: Well, I can't discount that much. David has been…lenient…on using rules. David in the ring, taking a microphone now…

The crowd boos David heavily as he looks around. Kelly is sighing at this, seemingly upset that they could boo her man. David rolls his eyes before starting.

David: You know, I can't believe some people still disrespect me after everything that I've done. I've beaten legends, won titles, and become one of the best fighters all around in this organization. How can you possibly disrespect me now?

The crowd starts a "David Sucks" chant now, and David is trying his damndest to block it out.

Gene: An unflattering chant for the younger Flair here, as the people are expressing his opinions about him.

Heenan: These humanoids don't realize true talent when they see it. Come on, let David talk!

After a few seconds, the chant dies down, and David continues.

David: Well, since it seems that you still don't respect me, I will have to dethrone another legend in this business. Ms. Kelly, if you will.

Kelly takes the microphone now, and looks to the crowd. "The following contest, scheduled for one fall, is for the MPRW Regional Heritage championship."

Gene: An unexpected title defense, how about that!

Heenan: See, another reason to respect David. He defends his title regularly.

Kelly continues. "In the ring, weighing 210 pounds…the current reigning MPRW Regional Heritage Champion…The Legend Killer, David Flair!"

The crowd boos some more at this…then suddenly, some orchestral music cues up.

Gene: Now wait a minute…

Heenan: I know who this is!

Out of the entryway comes a familiar figure in red and yellow, carrying a Soviet Flag with him. The crowd goes into stunned silence.

Heenan: Nikolai Volkoff! The only Russian Cosmonaut ever to grace a wrestling ring!

Gene: Talk about your legends…a wrestler for many years, a former WWF Tag Team Champion…apparently he's out to get revenge for what David did to the Iron Sheik last week.

Heenan: And the first man of Ted DiBiase's Million Dollar Corporation. Volkoff has done it all.

Volkoff gets in the ring, asking for something to Kelly.

Kelly: Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Volkoff requests that you all please rise and show respect for his singing of the Soviet National Anthem.

Heenan: Yes! Long, time no hear!

Gene: Well, all I have to say is this brings back memories…Flair stopping it though with an attack from behind!

Gene: Volkoff now trying to fight back, forearms to the chest of Flair, Flair reeling a bit now, Volkoff backing Flair into the corner now, big knee to David's gut.

Heenan: That's the fastest I've seen Volkoff move in over 20 years, and David wobbling out of the corner.

Gene: Nikolai has David now…and there's Volkoff's signature bearhug! This could be a win for the big Russian…but David trying to fight out…and…

Bobby: Textbook ear-box by David Flair. Volkoff lets go of the hold now, and David off the ropes with a great Swinging Neckbreaker. Well, assuming Volkoff HAS a neck.

Gene: He does Bobby…now David Flair going towards Volkoff's legs…locks in that Figure Four Ankle-lock of his!

Bobby: He calls that the Legendary End now, Gene! And it looks like Volkoff's gonna tap.

Gene: He's gotta go out…and there he goes.

WINNER BY SUBMISSION, STILL MPRW REGIONAL HERITAGE CHAMPION: David Flair

Bobby: And another legend bites the dust to the Legend Killer. David Flair wins it, in expert form!

Gene: Well, Flair gets to keep the MPRW Title one more day, and Kelly there to congratulate him. We'll be back after this.

*Commercials*

"The Inevitable Return of the Great White Dope" cues up as the Symbiote Squad makes their way to the ring. Lanky has the mic.

"You know...there's one thing, or one group I should say, is really popular these days. The Hardy Boyz."

A big pop comes from the crowd (especially the ladies).

"You know, its like every WWF show, I hear girls screaming, 'WHERE'S THE HARDYS! WHERE ARE THOSE HUNKS!' So that's why tonight, We're gonna sing this tribute to the Hardy fans all across the world."

The Squad each grab a mic as they then begin:

The Squad laughs as the crowd boos. They start to throw debris at them. Lanky shouts out...

"All of you Hardy Fans are nothing but fat, ugly, wanna-be sluts!"

"The Inevitable Return of the Great White Dope" cues up!

Megan: Well...that was...something else. :P

Paul: Truer words never sung, Megan. WELCOME EVERYONE BACK TO E.A.W. MAYHEM!! Up next, the EAW Triple Crown Heavyweight Championship is on the line!!

"Here Comes the Pain" by Slayer cues up first, bringing out Rash and Baby...

Capetta: The following match is scheduled for one fall with a 15 minute time limit and is for the EAW Triple Crown Heavyweight Championship! Introducing first, the challenger, accompanied by Baby. He is a member of Generation NEXT, and a symbiote of extraterrestial origin on his host Mike Logan...he stands 6'9" and weighs in at 268 pounds: Raaaaaaaaaaaash!!!

Paul: And Rash FINALLY getting his well-deserved title shot. Too bad you decided to not hock their merchandise anymore.

Megan: Don't worry, I don't regret it in the least. :P

The crowd boos Rash on the way to the ring, and he has difficulty rallying the crowd behind him...although Baby does a better job...

"Burning Inside" by Static-X then plays, and Kaye walks out from the entranceway with the EAW Triple Crown Title over her shoulder.

Capetta: His opponent, from Death Valley...she stands 6'1" and weighs in at 215 lbs. She is the EAW Triple Crown Heavyweight Champion...Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaye!!!

Megan: And our champion on her way to the ring. Many believe that Kane may just appear simply for this match...and Rash is a very formidable opponent for anyone. Plus Rash has the backing of that air-headed little ditz at ringside and all of Generation NEXT...

Paul: Moral support!

Megan: They HAVE no morals! Rash attacking Kaye just before the bell, and we have a title match underway!

Rash slugs away on Kaye, backing her against the ropes, and Irish Whips her off of them. Kaye hits a jumping clothesline off the ropes, knocking down Rash. Up quickly, and Kaye goes for a big boot--Rash ducks. He hits the ropes and a Cross Body on Kaye. Kaye kicks out at one. Rash up--clothesline ducked by Rash--Rash catches her--tosses her up and a BACKBREAKER on Kaye! Rash stomps away on Kaye, then pulls her up and sends her into the corner. Boot across the throat by Rash, then Rash with shoulder thrusts on Kaye. Set up for a superplex, but Kaye counters with a CHOKESLAM from the top!

Kaye is unable to roll onto Rash for a pin. Rash crawls out of the ring for a breather. Kaye follows him, lifting him up in a chokehold then ramming him back-first into the apron. She sits Rash on the apron then hits him with right hands. She goes for a chokeslam off the apron--Rash elbows her off of him...catches him in a wristlock, then leaps onto the top rope...Rash Attacking her to the outside!!

Rash sends Kaye to the steel stairs, then hits a an Asai Moonsault on her from the apron. No counts on the outside, soe her rolls her into the ring. Kaye gets up in a hurry and counters Rash's charging with an Irish Whip. Big Boot connects, and Kaye yanks him up by the throat. Scoop and a slam gets a one count. Set up again by Kaye...chokehold puts Rash down to one knee. Rash tries to slip free, and manages a hiptoss counter. Kaye up, and Rash puts her down with a Drop Kick. He pulls up Kaye, sets her up, and hits a Reverse Powerbomb sending her face-first into the turnbuckle, snapping her head back in the process. Rash covers...nearly gets a two, but a kickout by Kaye. Rash wrenches back on the head in a Dragon Sleeper variation. Kaye fights it best she can, and gets a....NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX COUNTER?!?!

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ONE!

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TWO!--and a kickout by Rash!!

Kaye signals that she's going to take it to Rash some more...and goes up to the top rope.

Rash up...Kaye up top waiting for him--Kaye dives off the top with a lariat--but Rash shoves Mike Chioda into the way...

Megan: And Rash cowardly using the ref to avoid getting hit with that diving top rope lariat from Kaye!

Paul: Cowardly or smart is all in how you look at it.

Megan: Rash with a Full Nelson on Kaye! Wrenching down hard on the move--spins her around--FINAL BITE!! FINAL BITE!!

Paul: And...now we have a replacement referee coming down to ringside...

Megan: No..not...DAVID FLAIR!!

Paul: YES, DAVID FLAIR!!

Megan: Kaye now fighting back...Rash not able to hold her up anymore--and a FLYSWATTER...and a good thing too, because I wouldn't be surprised to see David pull a Montreal right here.

Megan: Cover by Kaye...

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Kickout by Rash...

Paul: One second away! One second away!!

Megan: His one and two counts were right on...but did'nt even try to count a third.

Paul: No no...that looked right on to me...

Megan: Kaye up and giving David a piece of her mind...ROLL UP BY RASH!

ONE! TWO! THREE!!?!

Paul: NEW CHAMPION! NEW CHAMPION!

*ding, ding*

Megan: Kaye up and--

Paul: Don't do it Kaye! You'll get a big fat fine!

Megan: CHOKESLAM!! CHOKESLAM on David!! Pick up now...and a TOMBSTONE DRIVER by Kaye! Rash charging Kaye--back body drops him out of the ring!

Paul: And we have a brand new...what's she doing now?

Megan: Checking on Mike Chioda...and explaining the situation...

Paul: She's not..?!

Megan: Chioda up and DEMANDING Rash get back in the ring!

Paul: Why? He already won the match!

Megan: But David counted the pinfall...

Paul: So?

Megan: Chioda isn't about to let that decision stand...

*ding, ding*

Megan: And we have a restart to this match!

Rash and Kaye slug it out, and Kaye is sent to the ropes by Rash--RASH CATCHES HER with the Symbiotic Claw!! It weakens Kaye quickly...she begins to get dazed on her feet--and falls backwards over the top rope to the floor! However, luckily for her, it also allowed her to escape the Claw. Rash goes outside to the floor and is about to re-apply the Claw--but Kaye reaches up and grabs him around the throat!

Kaye gets up to both feet, then hoists up Rash, SLAMMING him back-first across the steel stairs! Rash is nearly doubled over and is winching from the move as the crowd cheers on Kaye. Baby goes to check on Rash, concerned. Kaye picks up Rash and tosses him into the ring. She covers him...

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ONE!

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TWO!

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KICKOUT!!

Kaye pulls up her opponent, tossing him to the ropes...she picks him up for a Gorilla--NO! Rash lands behind her, knees her in the back, then hits a REVERSE DDT!! Rash taunts Kaye a bit before applying a Mexican Surfboard. Chioda checks on Kaye, who shakes her head, refusing to give up. Rash lets go, and hoists Kaye up..hitting a BALDO BOMB!!! Makes the cover...

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ONE!

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TWO!

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And no!

Megan: Rash coming so close to HONESTLY becoming the champion with that Baldo Bomb.

Paul: He ALREADY did it in my opinion...

Megan: Picking up Kaye now--Irish Whip to the corn--NO! Kaye reversing! Charges into the corner--CLOTHESLINE! And a boot up underneath the chin! Knee lifts by Kaye, and a chokehold now--wait--Rash with one of his own--reverses--tosses KAYE into the corner! Right hands by Rash...backing up now...running in--and a MONKEY FLIP by Rash?!

Paul: YES! What amazing agility and skill from Rash! And a STANDING MOONSAULT by Rash!

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ONE!

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TWO!

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but a KICKOUT saves her...

Megan: Kaye up, she shakes the cobwebs out, and Rash setting her up for a suplex now--shots to the midsection now from Kaye!! Kaye shoving Rash to the ropes--fires him off to the far ones now...Power SLAM from Kaye! That may have knocked the wind right out of Rash, and picking up Rash now...set up for...YES...the STYGIAN BOMB!!!

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ONE!!

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TWO!!

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And Baby put Rash's foot on the ropes...

Paul: NO SHE DIDN'T!! I was watching the whole time, he put it on the ropes HIMSELF!

Megan: Oh yeah...

*Footage is shown of Baby doing just that*

Paul: SEE! I told you!

Megan: *sigh* Forget it. :P Kaye setting up Rash now--ATOMIC DROP by Rash! Rash getting his second wind...CLOTHESLINE from Rash...back up--ANOTHER ONE!! Rash setting up the Symbiote Sla--Kaye countering now...and a set-up for the Burning Rain...HITS IT!! Kaye makes the cover on Rash!

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ONE

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TWO!!

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THREE!!!

*ding, ding*

Paul: NOOOOO...this is a terrible conspiracy! Rash should already be the champion!

Megan: Kaye retaining, although David, who is just now coming out of it, attempted to forcibly take the title...

Capetta: Here is your winner, and STILL E.A.W. Triple Crown Heavyweight Champion--KAYE!

Megan: A well-fought match by both wrestlers...although one of them did it dishonestly.

Paul: Yeah, our so-called "champion." :P

Megan: We'll be back after this commercial break stay with us, folks!

**Commercial Break**

We come back from commercials, and there's a ladder set up in the entryway

Megan: Welcome back folks! Our main event will be up next, but during the break...

While Kaye is shown walking around in the backstage area, David Flair suddenly jumps her and start beating on her with a lead pipe.

Megan: In retaliation for that chokeslam and Tombstone, David attacked Kaye..and to add insult to injury...

While Kaye starts to recover, Nikolai Volkoff and the Iron Sheik join in with the same attack, focusing mostly on Kaye's legs (!).

Paul: Well, it's injury, but still, it's not so bad that it's two LEGENDS of wrestling!

Megan: But those two by themselves are older than all three members of the nWo. :P

David then locks on the Figure Four Anklelock, with screams of "I'll break your f***ing leg!!" as he does so. The three leave shortly thereafter.

Megan: Apparently Kane isn't the only worry that Kaye has now.

Paul: Yeah...she's making enemies in a hurry.

Megan: ...SHE?! She's not the one who tried to screw Rash out of a title!!

Paul: Well, then she should have just gone along with it...

Megan: ...No reasoning with you.

Paul: Of course...I'm always right!

Megan: Well, it's now time for the main event…the EAW Championship on the line in a ladder match.

Heyman: And I give props to Kirk Angel for wanting to defend this title against a worthy opponent like Nova. Two men of integrity are going to face each other…an Olympic Hero against a super-hero. I love it.

Megan: Integrity my ass. Nova with an unprovoked attack on Hurricane last Riot Rulz…and don't EVEN get me started on Kirk Angel.

"One Man Army" by Prodigy cues up, and out of the entryway comes Nova…getting boos from the capacity crowd for the first time since his days in Raven's flock.

Megan: And Nova getting a not-so-hot reaction from this crowd Paul. Apparently, they didn't agree with Nova's attack on the Hurricane.

Heyman: No doubt…even I did not like that, because Austin and I gave Hurricane the idea to be a super-hero so Nova would have a partner when he entered the WWF.

Megan: Well, those plans have gone down the toilet…and Nova looking at the ladder before going into the ring. As noted…you can only win by climbing that ladder and grabbing the title belt. No pins, no submissions…and no rules in this match.

Heyman: Just how it always should be in championship matches if you ask me: No rules, no DQ's. There MUST be a winner….I'll have to try to get that implemented.

Megan: Well, Nova in the ring now…ignoring the reception that he's getting…

"Gonna Fly Now" then cues up in the arena, and the boos start to intensify as Kirk Angel makes his way towards the ring…his special pyro exploding behind him as he does. Angel has changed the strap of the title belt…so half of it is blue with white stars, and the other half is red and white stripes.

Heyman: Megan, stand up! It's our champion…a deserving and fighting champion! A man of integrity! Your Olympic hero and mine, Kirk Angel.

Megan: Don't make me sick, Paul. The only reason that this guy won the EAW title in the first place is because he had someone help him out.

Heyman: You don't know that he couldn't have won without help. I believe he could have beaten Blink with no problem.

Megan: Well, we'll never know now. Kirk in the ring now, doing his spin…and now handing the belt to the referee. Nova looking on, wanting that belt as badly as Kirk wants to keep it. The referee now hooking it up, and it's being dangled above the ring.

Heyman: This match is about to get under way, and I have goose pimples about it. Hold me Megan!

Megan: Not if you were the last man on Earth.

Megan: The match is under way now…and Kirk extending a hand to Nova. Apparently, trying to show good will toward Nova…Nova takes the hand…DOUBLE CROSS! Knee to Angel's gut.

Heyman: Nova knows what's at stake…and friendships aren't made to last through title matches. Nova locking up the head of Angel now, Angel sending him off the ropes, backdrop attempt missed, Nova hits a clothesline, and Angel goes down!

Megan: More scientific wrestling than I expected thus far in a ladder match, and Angel getting back up to his feet now, grabbing Nova before he can go towards the ladder…suplex attempt blocked by Nova…now one blocked by Angel…and Angel gets a quick snap suplex on Nova!

Heyman: Angel now going outside the ring, going to get the ladder early on, but Nova is ready for him…somersaulting right onto Angel over the top ropes. Angel going down, and Nova now going for the ladder!

Megan: Angel starting to get to his feet now…and Nova ramming that ladder right into Angel's chest. Nova taking the ladder now, and slams it right between the shoulders of Angel! Angel in pain now, as to be expected in this type of match. Nova now going into the ring, setting up the ladder.

Heyman: But Kirk Angel isn't about to give up so easily. Angel managing to get up, and pushes the ladder down. Nova falls in a heap to the ground, and Angel right there to capitalize, grabbing the leg of Nova and slamming it against the ladder.

Megan: Angel continuing to pound Nova's leg into the ladder, apparently trying to weaken it so Nova has problems climbing up the ladder.

Heyman: A very smart move by Angel…this could be the difference making move set of the match.

Megan: Unfortunately, you're right. Angel now has Nova's leg set up in the ladder, going for a stomp…Nova manages to pull his leg out though, and Angel just stomps ladder. Nova holding his leg a bit in pain now, but manages to get a good one-footed dropkick on the Olympian.

Heyman: Proof of Nova's resiliency there, fighting through the pain to get another move onto Angel. Nova now going off the ropes, and a beautiful rolling neckbreaker onto Angel. Nova managing to get a slight advantage over Angel…setting up the ladder in the corner now…

Megan: Nova apparently trying to make sure Kirk is out for good before going to try to climb up the ladder…going up to the top…BIG splash from the top of the ladder onto Angel. The champion in pain now, and the ladder now falls right on top of him. That's gonna hurt him even more than before.

Heyman: No doubt about it…Nova has done his homework on ladder matches before this contest. Nova now taking the ladder, and setting it up…right over Kirk's body. Starting to climb up the ladder now, but Angel pushes it down…and Nova crotched onto the top rope!

Megan: This could give Kirk the opportunity he needs to retain his title. Kirk setting the ladder up himself now…but not climbing? What's this all about?

Heyman: Kirk saw Nova starting to stir, and he wants to make sure that Nova doesn't get a chance to get an advantage over Angel. Angel going behind Nova…Cobra Clutch…Nova flips out of the Olympic Plex attempt though! Dropkick by Nova into the small of Angel's back. Nova quickly going to climb up the ladder…but Angel back up.

Megan: Nova is almost to the top, but Angel climbing up really quickly…grabbing Nova from the top…HOLY ….!

The fans chant along to complete Megan’s thought…

”HOLY SHIT!! HOLY SHIT!!

Heyman: GERMAN SUPLEX FROM THE TOP OF THE LADDER! BEAUTIFUL!

Megan: Well, if that doesn't prevent Nova from winning the match, I don't know what will. Angel in pain…but he's starting to climb up the ladder himself now. He's reaching the top…but Nova starting to stir again! He pushes the ladder down again…and Angel's neck bounces right off the top rope of the ring.

Heyman: Both these competitors going for the richest prize in the game, and nothing will stop them from obtaining their goal it seems. Nova starting to get up to his feet, Angel holding his throat in pain. Neither man having a clear advantage.

Megan: Nova seems to be in better shape though, and going over to Angel…Novacaine! Nova gets a bit of an advantage now, walking away…but Angel grabs his ankle!

Heyman: ANKLELOCK! Angel had presence of mind to get his patented Anklelock onto the leg of Nova as he was walking away…Nova screaming out in pain from this.

Megan: But again, this match is about grabbing the title…now Angel letting go of the hold. He's setting up the ladder again, and it seems like he's gonna climb up it again. Angel reaching about halfway…Nova starting to stir…

Heyman: And Nova pushing the ladder again! Angel falling…and

*CRUNCH!*

Megan: Kirk Angel goes right through the Spanish announcers' table! Kirk Angel is down, and quite possibly out now!

Heyman: Now THAT'S the difference maker! There is NOTHING preventing Nova from becoming the new EAW World Heavyweight Champion now! All he has to do is climb up to the top and grab the belt.

Megan: And Nova seems to be going to do exactly that. Nova pulling the ladder back up to it's base now, making sure it's nice and stable. He's taking his time, but there's no one to stop him right now. He's climbing up.

Heyman: I think we're about to crown a new EAW World Champion Megan…and…wait a second, what the hell?

Megan: Nova to the top of the ladder, but from out of the crowd comes the Hurricane! Hurricane running up…he wouldn't…

Heyman: HURRIBREAKER FROM THE TOP OF THE LADDER, RIGHT ONTO THE FLOOR! HURRICANE HAS JUST OBLITERATED NOVA!

Megan: Hurricane getting revenge for what Nova did to him in the match against Seven. Nova is down, and Kirk now starting to stir at last. Hurricane leaving the ringside area, as Kirk starts climbing into the ring.

Heyman: Like I said earlier, there's no one stopping Kirk Angel from climbing up now. Angel reaching the top, and he grabs the belt!

WINNER, STILL EAW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION: Kirk Angel

Megan: Well, Angel once again retains his EAW World Title, with a bit of assistance from Hurricane.

Heyman: And you can bet that when Nova recovers from that Hurribreaker, there will be hell to pay for Hurricane.

Megan: Indeed. For Paul Heyman, I'm Megan Eko…so long everyone!