We get a fireworks display as the camera pans around the audience, who are cheering.
Road Dogg: Welcome everyone to another High Calibur! It's the Road Doggy Dogg with the A-Kinky-O!
Akiko grins. "Whaddup yo! HEY! We got a Logo!"
Road Dogg: Yep, the boys in the back made it up.
Akiko: WE GOT A LOGO!!
Road Dogg: ... yeah...
Akiko: A Logo, Dogg, a logo!!!
Road Dogg: Have you been in my stash again?
Akiko: ...the logo would be better if David Flair was crusified to it and crows were pecking out his eyes....
Road Dogg: ... O_o... yeah...
Yoooouuu loook sooooo.... good to me....
Capetta: The following match is scheduled for One-fall. Making his way to the ring, representing WWE and accompanied by Billy and Chuck, from Las Vegas, NV, weighing 228 lbs., Rico!
Road Dogg: And here come Billy and Chuck, set to stand gaurd for their stylist, Rico.
Akiko: o/~ The Abiguously Gay Duo! o/~
"Dare" by Stan Bush now cues up.
Capetta: And his opponant! Representing EAW, and weighing in at 191 lbs., from Raliegh North Carolina... The Hurricane!
Hurricane stops midway down and points up the ramp and who should come out but... WWE's Hurricane and Shannon Moore!
Road Dogg: Smart move there! Our Hurricane getting some backup in the form of two men he knows well AND who took care of Billy and Chuck this past Thursday.
Akiko: 3 COUNT!! Minus a hick, Plus a Doppleganger... GOOD GOD, is Shannon Moore a hotty. ^____^
Singles Match
WWE's Rico with B+C vs. EAW's Hurricane
Rico starts off, holding his own and showing that he's more thna just a stylist/manager. He rocks Hurricane a few times with some intense martial arts moves and technical wrestling skills.
Soon, Hurricane begins to get the advantage with a Hurricanrana and a series of fast moves. Chuck distracted the referee and Billy hopped up onto the apron, about to attack EAW Hurricane when WWE Hurricane and Shannon Moore pulled him off and chased him off.
The Ref turned back around just in time to see Hurricane hit the Hurribreaker for the win.
Winner: The Hurricane!
Road Dogg: Not just a victory for EAW, but for Babyfaces everywhere!
Akiko: I just hope they don't sing. ^_^;;
Road Dogg: As do I...
Latino heeeeat!
As "Latino Heat" begins to play, Eddy struts out. he gestures to himself, telling the crowd just who's the best one here.
Capetta: The following match is scheduled for One-fall. Making his way to the ring, representing WWE, hailing form El Paso, Tx, and weighing in at 220 lbs... "Latino Heat"... Eddy Guererro!
Road Dogg: Once again, we're getting some great Singles action here. WWE tells us to hate and boo Eddy. But if you ask me, he's perhaps one of the best they have.
Akiko nods. "Yeah. He's got the skills, he's got the moves, he's got the charisma... and lets not forget... THE PEOPLE'S MULLET!
"Break Stuff" by Limp Bizkit now cues and Chaynz comes out with a determined look on his face. Buzzsaw is coming out with him.
Capetta: And his opponant, representing EAW, from Venice Beach, CA, weighing in at 235 lbs., and being accompanied by Buzzsaw one half of Chainsaw... Chaynz!
Road Dogg: A show of unity here. Chainsaw is probably one of the best tag teams we have.
Akiko: Right below Oseiko and I. And ones we're done with all this David Flair crap, we're prove we're THE best. But anyway, my props to Chainsaw.
Road Dogg: And congrats on the coming marriage to Chaynz.
Akiko nods. "Shade's a good friend. It warms the heart to see her settling down with a nice guy in a monogumous relationship. Now... Buzzy on the other hand. I have a feeling that Ari is gonna institue the same marriage that Trip and Hera have, but in reverse. She can have all the studle and pie she wants, while Buzzy can only have HER pie, or some strudle if he's really desperate.
Road Dogg: Akiko...
Akiko: I'm sorry... I'm wrong... ...Ari would let him have the girls too.
Road Dogg: ...
Singles Match
WWE's Eddy Guererro vs. EAW's Chaynz
The match begins hot and heavy with both competators showing off their skills, ala wrestling, holds, reversals and a fast pace. Before long, however, Chaynz turns the tides with a powerbomb and begins to lay in some rough and powerful moves.
Eddy however soon begins to work Chaynz down with technical prowess and soon hits him with a reverse DDT. From there it's up and back down with a beautiful Frog Splash for the win.
Winner: Eddy Guererro
Road Dogg: Incredible match! Stay tuned in, folks, for more great action, after this!
Akiko: We have a Logo!
******COMMERCIAL******
http://www.spoonisia.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/image/assclown.jpg
**********************
Road Dogg: Welcome back to High Calibur!
Akiko: LOGO!
Road Dogg: ...
Lights out...
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*BOOM*
"Walls of Jericho" begins to play and Chris Jericho appears at the entrance with his arms out before turning and acting up for the crowd.
Capetta: The following match is scheduled for One-fall. Making his way to the ring, representing WWE, hailing from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, and weighing in at 231 lbs... "Y2J" Chris Jericho!
Road Dogg: Now, Jericho is another example of all that's wrong with WWE. Jericho is just bursting with talent and he's pushed aside.
Akiko: That's why EAW is the top company, because we judge on ability. Even... David Flair...
Road Dogg: Heh heh... so, grudging respect?
Akiko: Hell no... I can't respect him for ANYTHING. I'm just saying that ont he few occasions that he's fought WITHOUT cheating, it's been pretty good.
BOOM! HERE COME'S THE BOOM! READY OR NOT! HA HA! HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW!
"Boom" by POD plays as Fasha steps out, giving the crowd a pop, but her mind on business.
Capetta: And his opponant, representing EAW, from Portland, OR, weighing in at 125 lbs., Fasha!
Road Dogg: Fasha is indeed one of the best of our bright young stars. She combines speed and technical skills with a bit of unnatural power.
Akiko: These two are evenly matched, in my view, but I'm pulling for the home company.
Singles Match
WWE's Chris Jericho vs. EAW's Fasha
The match goes on long and hard. Neither seem to get an advantage, as each lays in their techniques in a constant struggle for supremacy. Soon the tides begin to turn when Jericho gets Fasha on the outside and employs some rather dirty tactics with a chair and the steel steps.
Fasha's tossed back into the ring and gets to her feet. Jericho follws and grabs her thighs, about to pulls her legs out form under her for the Walls of Jericho, but Fasha shows her ring presense by counting, grabbing his head and executing the STO-Lock, causing Jericho to tap out.
Winner: Fasha
Akiko: Yeah! 2-1, EAW's favor!
Road Dogg: True, but the fans are the real winners. We may be a supplimentory show, but we deliver the goods as well as Mayhem or Riot Rulz!
Akiko: And I really wanna see this next one. It's a Grudge Match of sorts.
Road Dogg: Indeed.
"Supergirl" by Shonen Knife cues up and Molly appears on the stage in her black and blue.
Capetta: The following match is scheduled for One-fall. Making her way to the ring, representing EAW, hailing from Mobile, AL, Molly Holly!
Road Dogg: Molly out here to prove a point against Chris Nowinski. Coming out not as Mighty Molly, but as Molly Holly herself.
Akiko: And you know that when that happens, she REALLY means business.
The Harvard Fight Song starts up and Chris Nowinski steps out with a big smile for the fans and Molly.
Road Dogg: You know, he's pretty good at wrestling. He's handsome. And you know, with that long blonde hair he's working on, I think he's got it in him to be a Nature Boy for the new generation. He's got all the traits of that classic persona that's dated all the way back to Buddy Rogers and Freddie Blassie.
Akiko: Yep. Long blonde hair. Stunning good looks. Nice smile. Ring skills. And of course the number ONE thing all Nature Boys have in common... they LOVE the Bootay!
Road Dogg: Well, It's true, really. OH! And we're starting early!
Singles Match
EAW's Mighty Molly vs. WWE's Chris Harvard
Molly jumps Nowinski early in the match and began to beat him down hard. But Chris took the beatings and kept coming, managing, of all things, a Hentaiplex! Whether it's due to him doing EAW homework, or just wanting to cop a feel, it's unknown.
Molly looks disgusted and goes for a tie-up. He moves her into a headlock and lets go to shove a hand down the back of her pants. She pushed him away, staring in horror of it all. He just grins and... sniff his hand?
This makes Molly even madder and she attacks with a series of punches and sends him out over the top. She then performs a top rope plancha to the outside. Nowinski is slowly getting up as Molly's already to her feet and has a steel chair which she plans between his eyes.
Before the ref reaches Ten, she rolls him back in and as he's getting up, performs the Valentine Neckbreaker and covers.
Winner: Molly Holly
Road Dogg: I think that's the meanest I've ever seen Molly. The good version at least.
Akiko: Yeah. but... it's not over! Nowinski up and extending his hand? Aww.. ain't that nice. And Molly taking it...
Road Dogg: What the...! Chris just pulls Molly in deep and is kissing her!
Akiko: I SEE TONGUE!! O.O!
Road Dogg: He's holdiong on tight and grabbign her butt! Slipping fingers down lower, Oh this isnt' right!
Chris Nowinski (In a Little Girl's voice pitch): EEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Akiko: HAH!!!! Molly with a Testicular Claw! And I think her hand is metal! Chris is dancing for her now!
Road Dogg: Molly finally letting go and leaving Chris int he middle of the ring, tears running down his face!
Akiko: You go girl!
Road Dogg: That's all for tonight! For Akiko, this is Road Dogg saying Farewell and come again!
Akiko: A LOGO, DOGG! A LOGO!!
™ & © EAW, Inc. 2002