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Poetry Of Justin Kreutzberg



The water falls over the jagged rocks, violence in

beauty. Fish struggle against the current that forcefully tickles their
bellies. I sit so tired against the peaceful banks thinking that this river
has all the depths of the life I ever could have wanted to live. I have never
felt more alone in the world than now, even sheltered by the soothing water
that falls. What is peace of mind when what you wanted so much has been
scattered in pieces? I lay on the soft, velvety carpet of moss that has
become my resting place hoping for a moment of clarity to erupt into my mind.
Sadness envelops me so much that the anger that seethes inside me almost
seemed to place itself into the rivers flow. The scene before me becomes not
so peaceful as the fish are hurled back with the increasing torrent of water.
Deep gray clouds that reflect my eyes at this moment broil over the once calm
landscape. A small red fox trots by looking for a place to sleep somewhat
covered from the rain. I admire the fox, whos only worry in this life is to
find shelter for the time being. I look deep into his eyes seeing what so
often I saw in my own eyes in the mirror. Hes hurt. He is so tired that even
if there was a visible threat to him he would complacently lay down and
embrace the death that ravaged him. I offer my arms to the tiny fox and with
barely a hesitation he resigns himself to cradling in my arms. Maybe he too
understands how much Ive been hurt by the world and he knows that we are
akin in that. Maybe he was just too hurt to care. I enfold the fox, pulling
his scent deep into my lungs remembering times when I did this with special
people. The rain has begun to soak through my jacket and deep into my bones
leaks the cold. My shivering however does not even rise a stir from the poor
huddled creature. I enshroud him in my clothes and offer the only warmth I
have left to this tiny abandoned creature. My body is numb but my heart is
warmed at the thought of finally being able to love something more than life.
Not wanting to injure the precious fox with my passing, I lay on my side and hold him
against my chest. My jacket covers the tiny animal completely, holding close
like an expectant mother. As the harsh rain continues to pour down, I think
to myself, what better last embrace of the mother could I have asked for? As
the last breath passes through my lungs the last thing I hear is the steady
breath of the sleeping infant. And the last thing I see is his tiny face that
has settled into a peaceful expression of release that has come from the love
I showed him to the last...


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