First I was a duck
To be sung to "I Will Survive"


First I was a duck
I was crucified
Kept thinking I could never 
Ever learn how to dive or drive
Then I spent so many hours
Thinking how your feet do pong
And I found my bong
And I stuck out my tongue

But now you’re back from Ricky Lake.  
I just walked in to find you there eating up all of the cake.  
I should have changed my silly shoes 
I should have made you make the tea, 
But now I'm saving all my lather 
For someone who's not bubbley.  

Go on now go.  Walk out the doh.....
Just put the knife down
And I'll try to ebb the flow
Weren't you the one who tried to maim me with your flies?
Do you think the apple crumble
Would become a spy