SEXUAL ODYSSEY PT. 1
Mood:  flirty
Now Playing: 12 PLAY R. KELLY
Laying here waiting for you to come home. Room lit with candles, rose petals on the bed, I'm laying here with 9 inch heels and a red laced teddy. On my right there's a pair of hand cuffs, a blindfold, a whip and feather teaser. On my other side, on the side table, there's some chocolate syrup, whip cream, lubricant, and edible massage oils.

I lay in anticipation for you to return from work. To see your surprised face as you follow the trail of clothes leading you to the bedroom. I hear your Chrysler pull up in front of the house, the doors slam, there's keys in the front door. You call for me but i don't answer. You slowly walk to the bedroom door, inspecting every peice of clothing. You open the door and your face is just the way I expected it to be. You smile showing off your beautiful straight teeth and walk over to the bed.

You come over to the bed trying to kiss me, I push you away. I slowly get up showing over my incredibly shaped body. I gently push you onto the bed and climb on top. You sit up on your elbows. I'm unbuttonig your shirt and taking the other one off. While I lift your arms to take your t-shirt off I quickly slip on the handcuffs. You look scared and then relax a little. I tell you everything is goingto be alright I'm not going to hurt you. I kiss your mouth, then jaw, then neck, down to your chest. Where I glide me tounge across your nipple then on to the other one.

I can already feel the bulge in your pants. I look up at you and your smiling down at me Still a little upset at the cuffs. I smile back the reach for the blindfold. You jump and protest angrily, but I insit that I will not harm you in any way. After a few moments of your bickering you give-in. I slip it on you. Then nibble on your ear and neck and chest. I then get the lotion and pour a small amount onto your body. You tense a little. I slowly start kissing and licking on your side. I blow on it to make it warm.

You moan a little. I go to your stomach and do the same then your other side. Back at your stomach not missing any of your many ripples, I undo your pants. I look back at you to see if you were going to saw anything. You didn't so i continued. As i pulled your pants and boxers down, I kiss along your waist. You moan a little more. Your pants are now at your knees and my mouth is now on your thigh kissing genlty. With your pants at your ankle, you ask me why I stop. I very playfully tell you ssshhhhh.

I get the lotion again and pour it on your legs and rub it onto your dick which is now fully erect. I'm licking it off and once again start blowing on it to make it warm. this excites you even more. I lick on your balls and you jump out of suprise. I giggle and continue. I'm licking all the lotion on your penis. I get to the head and suck on it softly tehn suddenly go all the way down on it. You moan again but louder.

As I suck on your dick more you continue to get louder saying erotic things that makes me not want to stop. But I have to. I try to turn you over and you atomatically curse and wonder what the fuck I'm doing. I assure you that everything is okay. With you turn on your stomach, I move your dick so that its right there between your legs. I'm sucking on your dick backwards. You're ohing and ahing. Oh shit its turning me on. I lick on your balls again. Then suddenly kiss you on your ass. Your ass clinches up and you tell me not to do that anymore. But you have such a cute ass and I want to please you anyway I can so I can't stop. I kiss and lick you all over your ass.

Now you are oh shit-ing and damn-ing. And trying to turn back over but I hold you like your are but starting to suck on your head again. While doing that I take your mind off of your ass by jacking you as I massage your head with one hand and stoking your side using my nails with my other hand. You're telling me how much you love me and want to be inside of me. I'm listening but being to into what I'm doing I'm not really paying attention. I stop and suddenly lick you all in your crack.

You curse and thrash and tell me to stop but I beg you to let me keep going. Please george I want to do this to you. Please I love you george. Let me please you any way I can. You let me continue so I started licking from your head, down your dick, to your balls, and up your crack,(where you jumped and tensed up again)then back down. I love doing this to you. It feels so good doing things to you. I turn you back on your back and went down on you again. Your man hood is throbbing and your are oh shiting again. I think you are about to...........


TO BE CONTINUED...............

TEMPTED----------DAY 1
Mood:  blue
Now Playing: ONLY YOU
I feel bad. A old flame resurfaced. BUt not really. I was with this guy before I was with my boyfriend but it didn't work out between me and him. We were still friends but I always kept conversation at a minimum.
Its hard now because I work with him. They moved me to the same collateral as he so now we work side by side. I miss my boyfriend so much and they always reminded me of each other. A LITTLE BIT. As far as how easy it was to talk to them and how they would just take my mind off of everything.
I don't want to do anything with this guy but my old feelings are starting to come back. I love my man so much and wouldn't want to do anything behind his back or cheat on him in any way. I'm about to cry now. I hate being tempted. I love and care about him so I shouldn't even have any feelings like this, but just the little things he does like if I'm walking pass he'll come and grab my hand or lift my face and ask what's wrong.
And for no reason just coming up to me and hugging me. That's things my man did and now he's not here and I'm missing everything he has done. I don't need to be here and feeling like this. He's truely my heart and my everything. I don't know what i would do without him. I want to kiss him like now. feel his lips on me, my chest, my neck.
I want to rub on his chest and stomach kissing softly as I touch every spot. Then I love going down on him. He twitches and he try to play it off like it ain't shit but his toes start curling up. Then when he's driving like on long trips. Its so fun to do it then cause no matter how much he wants to fuck me he can't because he's driving.
The shit he says when I do that turns me on and I just don't want to stop. No matter how much my jaw hurts. I love pleasing my man. And every reaction he has to what ever I do is just a turn on. Then his juices are so damn sweet sometimes. Just having them on my lips makes me moist. Just talking about it makes me horney. Thinking about these things make me think about the other guy.
He didn't have it like my man has it. I didn't share myself or do as much for his as my man. He didn't deserve it then and doesn't deserve it now. So why am I trippin about him trying to get back with me. Fuck him. I got a man that I would fuckin kill for, damn die for, I'll do anything for my man.
Fuck everybody else They don't mean shit to me. Neway. I had a dream it was so good. Neway, back on the other things. I love his dick in my mouth. The taste, the texture, the feeling, the fact that HIS dick is going in and out of my mouth, damn he got a big dick. I never told him that, but he does. Oh shit.
His dick is really big for him to be a slim guy. And then on top of that, the way he works it. is like damn, oh shit baby fuck the shit out of me type sex. AAAAAAHHHHHHHH, I feel like screaming. But one thing he don't do is bust on me. I want him to just fuck the shit out of me one day then just fuckin nutt all on my face and chest everywhere.
I want him to hold me down and fuck me till I fuckin scream so the damn neighbors fuckin hear it. I would like him to fuck me in the ass but his dick is tooooooo big. That shit hurt. But for one day to just try and take it slow and then slide it in And fuck my ass the same way he fucks my mouth and pussy.
He don't even have to go down on me. Its okay but its nothing to get addicted on. I like how he trys to keep a straight face but he gets this line in his forhead like right down the middle. Then the way he licks his lips. OH shit when I'm on top its like damn baby you're fine as shit.
You're sexy as hell. You are everyday but I never tell you cause it goes to your head. But damn you are. In and out the bed. You have a nice ass body too. One of these days I want to just lick you all over your body and if you say anything about me kissin your ass or lickin it cause I'm going to do that too baby.

I love you baby don't ever forget that. Many guys will try to take me from you but just know that no matter what you got me. Every fuckin thing about me.. All this shit belongs to you.

MY LAST CRY
Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: NOT GOIN' CRY -MARY J. BLIGE
Today Steelers beat Redskins. I just watched the last 4 minutes of the game. I felt kinda bad watching it without him. I still miss him like crazy. He gets out this Friday and has to go to TPU. I'll hopefully be there too but he might not even think about that at first and he might leave. Oh my god, I want my baby. Alot of times I want to cry, Like right now but can't cause I've just about ran out of tears. I want my baby. In my arms like now. I had a dream and I think I'm going to make that dream come true. It was a very good dream. Oh shit, it was agood dream. He might mess up everything. Soon as I get off restriction, I go on leave. But I don't think I'm going anywhere this time I might not even take leave. I really need to look for a place and Get evrything set up. i already have some things picked out so on my time off I'll go and see it and talk to the people.

MIND ON FIRE
Mood:  on fire
Now Playing: I HATE EVRYTHING ABOUT YOU
Oh my gosh. My back hurt so much from sleeping in that pittiful mattress. They could have done alot better than that. For the navy to have all this money but can't even get there members something worth sleeping on. And on top of that there's not alot of ways I can sleep cause laying on my stomach is very uncomfortable.
I hate this shit. I found out where I was going once I leave the ship. They are still trying to get me to go underway. I think its to punish me for when we go to Florida. I don't want to go. I know my baby isn't going to be there. He doesn't get out til the 3rd. I miss him. I don't even think he notices how much him being away from me is hurting me so.
Yesterday, I felt that I didn't want to have this baby. I'm now 11 weeks. I don't know. Its like he says he's happy but I know he was happy then with all his other girls had there babies. So how is this happiness different from theirs. I don't like it. I don't want to give it up for adoption. BUt if he's not there when I have it that's what I'm going to do.
If he's there then after a while I'm going to leave him with the baby. I know its wrong but I have to put my whole life on hold for a child but for him he could just leave us anyway. I don't want the baby to go to D.C. He will be wanting it to. Then he's going to be wanting for his friends to see it. That shit ain't going to happen.
Its like shit I haven't even meet your friends why the fuck you want my child around them. And don't even think those females going to watch it either. Hell no. Especially that one. She can't even take care of herself or her kids so what the fuck make you think she's going to be able to watch my child for a minute.
I hope I don't have a boy. If its a girl and you try that same shit as with your other daughter, I'm fucking done with you. My child don't have to know you. I know that sounds fucked up but that's just how its going to be. I'm getting out of the military.
You want all of my attention but damn look at it like this. Why do I have to share you but you can't share me? When we went to D.C., you went out and saw your friends even spent the night over there house. Damn females. Left me in the house and shit. Didn't tell me when you were or nothing.
BUt when I went home and talked to my friend on the phone you got mad and I said I was going over their house you talked about leaving and shit. I didn't say shit like that to you. And you're going to get fuck mad at me for some shit like that.
Even if you were playing when you said that, you shouldn't play like that. Cause like you said how can I get mad when you talked to someone that you knew before me.
Nigga you can't have your cake and eat it to. I've kept all these things trapped in my mind. You have no idea how much this shit has bothered me.

Day before Thanksgiving
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: WIND BENEATH MY WINGS
The day before Thanksgiving. I don't have my boyfriend, I'm stuck on this ship, and I have no family coming to see me. Could it possibly get any worst? Yes, it could. I'm 2 months pregnant and the food here sucks terribly. It might be okay tomorrow but I doubt it.
I'm so ready to see my boyfriend again. He always would rub my stomach before we go to sleep. I love him so much. We are currently engaged. I'm beyond ready to see him again. To hold him in my arms, kiss his lips, rub on his chest, all those things. I never realize that I would ever think about someone as much as him. Now I'm here worring about him. Wondering what he's doing or how he is? I'm so worried. Every night I sleep with his jacket on just to have something or his close to me.
I'm so lonely on this ship without him. He's the only reason why I've been here as long as I have. He was the reason why I came back all of the times I came back. To see his smile, hear his voice, look into his eyes. Everything made me feel alot better. It made me forget about the things I was going through. Just to hear him for a few minutes. He made me laugh no matter how bad I was feeling, he always put a smile on my face. I miss that now.
He is truely the sunshine of my life. I'll be glad when he get situated so we can make everything final. And live out the next chapters of our life. Now I have a child to think about. I have that to look forward to. That is what keeps me going everyday. It keeps me ticking. I even eat now not cause I want to but have to. Breakfast is kinda hard to eat sometimes.
I love my man and the child that he gave me. And waiting for our child to get here and knowing that we'll be happier ever after once everything get finalized pushes me through the day and brings me closer to the day my baby will be in my arms again.

MY LIFE
Mood:  sad
I truly don't like my job. I do nothing but sit in a cold dark room and look at a screen with some pale green objects and a green line that moves around in a circle.
I would leave my job but I'm contracted for another 3 years to do it. The worst thing about it is that if I'm not doing that, its just sit around until there's work to do and lots of training on bull shit stuff that they would never let you do.
My boyfriend isn't here and that's like the only person that keeps me sane. I love him.
More about this job. I signed up for it on October 31, 2002. I didn't start til Oct. 22, 2003. At first. I had to go to school for it. It was okay. Once I got to my actual job( which they call first command) it sucked.
Being a female going to a ship, Other females aren't going to like you all that much. They hated me for being cute and having a nice ass. They find new females a threat to there exsisting relationships. I really didn't care.
It got to the point where they started trying to get me in trouble. I kept everything in, but one day I just couldn't hold anything in so I got in alot of trouble. Fuck those bitches, that's what I told them.
This one female would talk shit behind my back so much that one day I told her to grow some balls and say the shit in my face. She still didn't. Then i just so happened to be walking around the corner when she was talking about me, I just grabbed her by her little bitty head and told her if I every hear you saying something about me behind my back I'll fuck you up. I got in alot of trouble cause she was higher ranking. But she didn't say nothing else.
These people here think your a puh-over if you don't say anything back but as soon as you do you get in trouble for disrespect. Whatever you do, if you have a short temper, don't like being involved with people, and just not a people person all together don't and I repeat DON'T JOIN THE MILITARY.