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chickens from space are coming to eat you, they will suck your brains out first, then they will take your wallets and run to the river to live in a van and roll doobies while eating a healthy diet of government officials, beware the chicken of death, the chicken of death is also the one with the large hat on his head, it will take your wallet and sell your genitalia for cash, he will take your bannanas and feed the monkeys in the bronx zoo with them, the monkeys there will escape and kill off all the humans, the monkeys will then take the bananas and shove them up their butts following this they will run around screaming “cheezelog in the moonlight” and procede to eat the bananas with cream cheese, the monkeys will eventually turn on the chickens, causing the future war that will be called “ the monkey chicken war”, alarm clocks and toaster ovens will all go off simultaneously causing the earth to vibrate and shudder violently, making its axis change, which would then cause an extreme ice age, freezing all the monkeys and chickens left who were hiding with osama bin laden in the caves of the Bronx zoo, they will venture out through the air conditioning vents, they will see the elephant of time who will tell them that they have ten days to live before the entire earth implodes to an oblivion the earth will then transfer through 8,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 dimensions eventually stopping at the dimension where everyone hates each other(this is the perfect environment for osama) the people like to eat the turkeys which we all know is the worst thing any one can do, but anyway back to the giraffes, in the current year (2112) and the national phone number of iraq is 567-8309, we urge all of our readers to call them collect and save a buck or two, when they pick up we ask that you say “ yo “ they will procede to say “can I write a check?” and they will lick a diaper in distress, the diaper willl be disposable, and it has readjustable wings, they then proceed to eat beef in response to the war effort against the cows, also in this decade the chickens are confronted with the massive armies of evil death cows, the evil death cows are so large that they can wear a large hat on their feet, and now back to the giraffealopians, the giraffealopians are the very intelligent people of earth in 2112, they are so intelligent that they know it is safe to eat razor blades, the razor blade is a very common food among this race, which could explain the numerous mass graves in the arctic, the environment is so much better now then it was in the current years, the grass is now greener on our side instead of theirs, causing mass havoc in the mind of the lunatic, the lunatic is a secret sorcerer monsterous hag who lives in the bowels of the ocean, occasionally the ocean moans “ahh I have to shit a sorcerer now!” but then it proceeds to eat the giraffeididles, the national flag of the ozmagizanz is a black background with a † the color of blood, the monkeys by this time are sleeping in the ruins of the Bronx zoo, the Bronx was hit by a massive cow flung over the fortress walls by a catapult, the current zulargian time is r pheezite garf r triglozian anal badgers will take over your bum in 29 days, they will spread from bum to bum until all bums are contaminated, the bum badgers are very deadly, they will suck your brain up and then shoot it out of your bum, the bum will be used for hibernation, but anywhoo back to the giraffes, the giraffes are very short in this time period, they feed on small bushes in office complexes, also there are no more tree huggers, therefore they are re-allowed to make the Chiquita stickers on my off-name-brand bananas, the monkeys like the stickers because they can use them to protect against the bum badgers, the reason all the animal species have a similarity is because they are somewhat the same, DIAPERS OF DEATH! After writing all of this I am more frustrated than a legless Ethiopian who is watching a doughnut roll down a hill…. < famous quote of a fellow class mate Written by: an anonymous character who cares This paper was brought to you by our friends at mcdonalds and the company that makes asprin, also known as the “happy hatch” thank you