I see the end now closer than it has ever been. I have lost all will power to live. There are so many questions in my head, too many to be answered. I don’t understand why every time I try, I fail. I have fallen into a deep depression, where I don’t even feel like laughing anymore. My end is slowly coming, or maybe it is coming faster than I think. In my mind I cannot envision myself living till next school year. I am sick of it all, sick of life, sick of living, and sick of fucking being me. I can’t even look into the mirror without feeling sick. I have been told that dreams can come true, but this saying has no meaning to me anymore. For I believe nothing will ever turn out the way I want it to. Of course things won’t go my way, and if they do it would be short lived satisfaction because that is how it has always been, and how it will always be. One moment things would be great, to the point where it seems as if life could not get any better, but then the next moment ill lose everything, happiness, joy, and everything that is good. It has happened to me so many times before, and it wouldn’t surprise me if it happens to me again. I want to run… away… from everything… everyone… I want to run away… never return.. and only a very few people would ever notice that I am missing.