April 18, 2012

This weekend Lady Laura and I went to an antique store (indoor yard sale) in the nearby town of Berwick - itís pretty big and you can always find something really odd and interesting there. And yet I find walking around that store raises many questions.

1. Why would anyone need half a map of Pennsylvania? I saw not only one, but two of these while I was walking around. But why? Why would someone buy half a map of Pennsylvania? Or anywhere for that matter? It would seem that maps are best when they are whole. But maybe this is just indicative of my personal philosophy, in my eyes, the map is always half-missing. Curious, because Iíve always thought of myself as an optimist. You can really learn a lot about yourself in an antique store.

2. Why are toys from my childhood in an antique store? There was one booth that was positively filled with toys I owned as a child and they were all labeled ďantiqueĒ. I find this very upsetting as it made me contemplate my own mortality and I really felt like I had another ten years or so before I had to do that.

3. Who needs taxidermied squirrels in chains? I mean, itís not bad enough that someone killed two squirrels for fun, you have to put them in chains? I bet whoever buys that will have a massive case of squirrel hauntings on their hands. And trust me, squirrel hauntings are some of the worst kinds of hauntings.

Seriously folks, you should go antiquing because itís a pretty philosophical experience. While I'm not a drinker, I found it interesting there are globes that turn into bars there and so thatís pretty cool. According to my neighbor Bill, any place that sells things that have secret liquor hidden in them is a-ok with him.

The best part of the day was going home with a "new" lava lamp. Guess the sixties aren't dead yet! Cool, man.