this girl was lying in bed one night contemplating the way she felt when she saw that Sir was not online nor had responded to her email. she had a nice conversation with her self. she did admit honestly that she was disapointed, but she also was concened that Sir was ok.

she came to the conclusion that submission was not as easy as she once thought, or that many think. for submission is not about the sub's happiness or satisfaction, but ultamitly it is about His happiness and His satisfaction. while it is true that the sub/slave attains their happiness and satisfaction from the happiness and satisfaction of Him, but to make Him happy or satisifyed so that the sub/slave will be happy and/or satisfiyed is selfish. for it is not about the sub/slave's happiness but His happiness.

true it is human nature to be a little selfish, but there is no room for that in true submission, for the sub/slave's very being is to serve and please Him, to be selfish and do so not out of wanting to please, but wanting pleasure, is nothing else but topping from the bottom, plain and simple. also it means the sub/slave has not given one's self compleatly over to the direction of the One who commands her.

For in true submission, the sub/slave thinks of nothing else but the pleasure/happiness of the One who commands her. she does not think that by pleasing Him she will then find her pleasure, she thinks solely of His pleasure and what she can do to further please Him.

when a sub/slave begins to think of her pleasure through the pleasure of the One, she needs to check herself, before her attitude leads to her Sir checking her attitude for her. she needs to stop and think, "would this line of thinking please Sir?" the answer this girl can assure you is "No." and if she keeps her mind on what will please Sir, then she will make further strives to move from being a sub to a slave.

here is where we find a difference between sub and slave. to a point.....(this girl said..."to a point") it is almost a given that a sub would have such ideas. but it is expected that as a sub moves down the path that leads to being a true slave, that she abandon those thoughts. for a true slave does not think of anything but pleasing her Master. she has no thought of her own pleasure, she has no worries that she will be pleased, she worries that her actions, attitueds and motions please her Master. and if it brings about her pleasure, then it would be pleasing to Master. its a cycle. the slave pleases Master, if Master wishes, He pleases the slave, and in the slave's pleasure and positive response, she pleases Master even more.

a slave is just that, she is property. she has a mind, a body, a heart and a soul. but they all belong to her Master, therefore she has no worries of her pleasure, of her safety. for she knows and trusts her Master totally. there are no thoughts of herself, no thoughts of her saftey, no thoughts of her pleasure, because all of those belong to her Master.

submission is a beautiful thing, but if it is not total, it is nothing more than something empty.....if a sub does not accept the leadership of One who wishes to lead her down the road to slave...to further develope that precious gift, then there is no reason to offer that gift in the first place.