The (insert city) Personals
Gorm Thorwald (pronounced "thor'vald")
Rich, But Seeks...
Living in a 4,000 sq. ft mansion, I roam pleasantly around the house doing whatever I want. But this still does not satisfy my outdoor fetishes. I have a strength index of 15.01. 
Many people get out of my way when they see me. It's not because I'm intimidating or anything; it's just that I get a lot of respect. How am I rich? For a living, I conquer small businesses and land. Whenever I have spare time, I go hunting for deer with my spear. Occupied with work, I hunt whenever I have time. I also like running around in my horny hat and armor while at the same time swinging my mace around since this type of training strengthens my muscles. Though I like hunting, I absolutely hate fishing. It is a weak-end activity. Simply no thrill or challenge. I prefer whaling, Leif Ericson style that is. Every fortnight, I go out in my hand-crafted canoe, which I made when I was twelve, with my spear in hopes of catching a whale. As happy as this life seems, I would like a woman to share these experiences with. But she must be pure-bred Viking or of Icelandic descent (or Greenlandic descent) and have a strength index of at least 7.23. I can imagine us spearing deer together, whaling in my canoe together, and frolicking (or rampaging, whichever you prefer) in flower fields with our horny hats and armor and swinging our maces. Every night after conquering, I will bring back a deer or two or maybe even a whale, and we will partake of it in candle-light. Life will be perfect. Send me a parchment via pidgeon if you are interested!
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