Letter to my Doulas
trying to think of what I could give to you in appreciation of all
you have done for me.
After pondering this for a couple of weeks, it occurred tome that
I could d a sort of "Birth Story' for you from my
perspective. My goal is to have you realize just how much
you did for me and what it meant.
The weeks preceding the birth was a busy time. We all went
to the hospital tour and you met Kit for the first time. This
was tense for me as I desperately wanted Kit to like you as much
as I do.
Closer to my due date I received a call almost daily from one of
you. You listened to my whining and complaining. There
was a sense of anticipation building up to the birth. Sort
of like waiting for Christmas Day. I went from Melinda's
calls which were full of fun and chatter to the quiet, calm
reassurance of Lynne.
It had not occurred to me before now that you two compliment each
other. Melinda, I needed you to keep the mood light and to
me laugh, but Lynne, I also needed you keep me grounded and
Birthing Day started with me calling you at an ungodly hour.
Neither of you complained and you both came over to the
house. My contractions slowed, then stopped but you
reassured me and told me not to feel guilty about calling you so
soon. You sent Kit and me to bed and went to do your errands
leaving a pager and cell number. You left Kit with
specific instructions on what you expected us to be doing in
your absence. I think you shocked him, but this was also
when he started to feel really comfortable with you.
When things did pick back up and you returned, I was not prepared
for all the attention you would give me. Never before in my
life have I felt so special, so cared for.
As my labour progressed and became more difficult one of you were
always right there with me. The following are things that
have stuck in my mind from this time:
remember always having hands on me-rubbing my back, my shoulders,
my legs. You knew just where and how to touch me. At
the time I told you, Lynne, that you had magic hands. I
truly believe that. Melinda, there was a time that you were
stroking my arm from my shoulder down to my fingers. It
really felt as if you were taking the tension out of my
shoulders and throwing it onto the floor.
Lynne, I really loved sitting on the birthing ball with you
sitting behind me. I felt so secure knowing that you were
there to help me through the next contraction.
Perhaps when I need you both the most was for the lunging. Not
only was I happy that you suggested it, for it did work to turn
the baby from a posterior position, but you were both right there
helping me through each contraction. Lynne, you held me and helped
me lunge, and Melinda, you kept eye contact and never stopped
rubbing me. Even at this very difficult time, I was able to
relax, not only between contractions but during them as well.
Lynne, when you left to go teach your class I was just about ready
to push. This all a bit of a blur to me now, but I remember
saying goodbye to you. You were there when I really needed
you. I was sorry that you don't stay to see the final
product of our labour, but I couldn't have done without you as
well as I did up to that point.
Melinda, I must tell you that you are the one person that remember
being there throughout the whole pushing stage. Even though
we are close in age, you mothered me during that time. When
I felt like I couldn't d it, it was into your shoulder that turned
I hope that sharing my thoughts on Meagan's birth ahs helped you
to realize the impact you had o Never did Id ream that you
could do so much for me. I was completely blown away by the
amount of attention I received.
Because of both of you, Kit and I had a beautiful, intimate
experience. Your being there allowed him to participate at
his own comfort level. I was shocked at how involved he
became. He truly is a Doula husband now.
Having you for Doulas will help me to become a better Doula.
Perhaps this is the best compliment I can give you.
One day I will watch the birth video with my daughter and tell her
about the incredible women who helped her into the world.
Melinda, during the Blessingway ceremony you gave me the following
you have come to the edge of all the light you know,
And are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing that one of two things will happen -
There will be something sold to stand on, or
You will be taught how to fully.
Thanks to God, but thanks also to you both, I did fly.
With my love,