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A Letter to my Doulas

I was trying to think of what I could give to you in appreciation of all you have done for me.

After pondering this for a couple of weeks, it occurred tome that I could d a sort of "Birth Story' for you from my perspective.  My goal is to have you realize just how much you did for me and what it meant.

The weeks preceding the birth was a busy time.  We all went to the hospital tour and you met Kit for the first time.  This was tense for me as I desperately wanted Kit to like you as much as I do.

Closer to my due date I received a call almost daily from one of you.  You listened to my whining and complaining.  There was a sense of anticipation building up to the birth.  Sort of like waiting for Christmas Day.  I went from Melinda's calls which were full of fun and chatter to the quiet, calm reassurance of Lynne.

It had not occurred to me before now that you two compliment each other.  Melinda, I needed you to keep the mood light and to me laugh, but Lynne, I also needed you keep me grounded and relaxed.

Birthing Day started with me calling you at an ungodly hour.  Neither of you complained and you both came over to the house.  My contractions slowed, then stopped but you reassured me and told me not to feel guilty about calling you so soon. You sent Kit and me to bed and went to do your errands leaving a  pager and cell number.  You left Kit with specific instructions  on what you expected us to be doing in your absence.  I think you shocked him, but this was also when he started to feel really comfortable with you.

When things did pick back up and you returned, I was not prepared for all the attention you would give me.  Never before in my life have I felt so special, so cared for.

As my labour progressed and became more difficult one of you were always right there with me.  The following are things that have stuck in my mind from this time:

I remember always having hands on me-rubbing my back, my shoulders, my legs.  You knew just where and how to touch me.  At the time I told you, Lynne, that you had magic hands.  I truly believe that.  Melinda, there was a time that you were stroking my arm from my shoulder down to my fingers.  It really felt as if you  were taking the tension out of my shoulders and throwing it onto the floor.

Lynne, I really loved sitting on the birthing ball with you sitting behind me.  I felt so secure knowing that you were there to help me through the next contraction.

Perhaps when I need you both the most was for the lunging.  Not only was I happy that you suggested it, for it did work to turn the baby from a posterior position, but you were both right there helping me through each contraction. Lynne, you held me and helped me lunge, and Melinda, you kept eye contact and never stopped rubbing me.  Even at this very difficult time, I was able to relax, not only between contractions but during them as well.

Lynne, when you left to go teach your class I was just about ready to push.  This all a bit of a blur to me now, but I remember saying goodbye to you.  You were there when I really needed you.  I was sorry that you don't stay to see the final product of our labour, but I couldn't have done without you as well as I did up to that point.

Melinda, I must tell you that you are the one person that remember being there throughout the whole pushing stage.  Even though we are close in age, you mothered me during that time.  When I felt like I couldn't d it, it was into your shoulder that turned my head.

I hope that sharing my thoughts on Meagan's birth ahs helped you to realize the impact you had o  Never did Id ream that you could do so much for me.  I was completely blown away by the amount of attention I received.

Because of both of you, Kit and I had a beautiful, intimate experience.  Your being there allowed him to participate at his own comfort level.  I was shocked at how involved he became.  He truly is a Doula husband now.

Having you for Doulas will help me to become a better Doula.  Perhaps this is the best compliment I can give you.

One day I will watch the birth video with my daughter and tell her about the incredible women who helped her into the world.

Melinda, during the Blessingway ceremony you gave me the following verse:

When you have come to the edge of all the light you know,
And are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing that one of two things will happen -
There will be something sold to stand on, or
You will be taught how to fully.

Thanks to God, but thanks also to you both, I did fly.

With my love, 


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