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Welcome to the Offical Copper Sass Website!

 

This is a site dedicated to Copper and the sass it creates.  If you don't know what copper is then here is a definition.

Copper: (kpr) - Noun

  1. Symbol Cu A ductile, malleable, reddish-brown metallic element that is an excellent conductor of heat and electricity and is widely used for electrical wiring, water piping, and corrosion-resistant parts, either pure or in alloys such as brass and bronze. Atomic number 29; atomic weight 63.54; melting point 1,083°C; boiling point 2,595°C; specific gravity 8.96; valence 1, 2. See table at element.
  2. A coin, usually of small denomination, made of copper or a copper alloy.
  3. Chiefly British. A large cooking pot made of copper or often of iron.
  4. Any of various small butterflies of the subfamily Lycaeninae, having predominantly copper-colored wings.
  5. A reddish brown.
  6. Often hang's above one's head, causing pennies to land in the mouth

Now that we know what copper is, let's take a look at the history of Copper Sass.

The first recorded use of copper sass was around the time of 431 BC when the Greek gods Apollo and Poseidon, were punished by the main man Zeus for hanging a copper rod over his head.  In turn Zeus got all pissed, shoved a roll of pennies into their mouth's and said, "Take that assholes!" then forced them down to the mortal world to live among men.  This pissed  off Apollo and Poseidon, so they decided to get that copper rod swinging by helping Zeus's enemies built a huge kick ass city named after some dude named Troy. Needless to say this pissed of Zeus big time. So Zeus called up his roid pumping son, Hercules, and got him to go over and trash the city.

This was the first use of copper. As you can see copper can cause a lot of anger and spite. Now lets take a quick look at how copper sass has affected the history of mankind.

At the beginning of recorded time, some guy named Jesus, who obviously did way too much acid, went around saying he was the son of god, and there for king of the world. Well at this time the real king Cesar, who was some guy they named a salad after because he wore lettuce on his head, was tasting the copper from this cause all his people were believing this whacked out Jesus guy.  So Cesar decided to hang the biggest copper rod yet over the head of Jesus, then shoved copper in his ears, and up his ass. Then to finish off the sass, Cesar let all his people throw pennies into Jesus' mouth. But something was wrong here...Jesus was immune the sass! He took all the copper that they could toss at him, then smiled, pooped his pants, and then died. after Jesus there only a few cases of other people who were immune to the copper. those being, Buhdaa (the ultimate in copper resistance), Gandhi (this guy took a lot of sass!), and Michael Jackson ( I mean come on, who has tasted more copper than this guy?)

On to 1789, in the country of France a whole lot of people were tasting copper because of some dude named Louis XVI. Louis was forcing everyone in his country to taste the copper because if they didn't hide it in their mouth's he would take it away from them. Eventually everyone was so sick of tasting the copper, they decided to go over to his place, beat the living crap out of him and his friends, and hang copper rods all over his huge castle. After a while of trying to keep all the copper he had taken, Louis XVI gave up and was anal raped repeatedly with copper rods.

Into the 21st century, some asshole named Oslama Bin Laden Hung a Huge copper rod over the city of New York. This retard thought that if he successfully hung this rod over New York, all the people there would feel the sass so much that they would crap their pants and die. Well little did he know that New York has like 500 million tons more copper than he did. So they went over to his place, which by the way was pretty much a hole in the ground full of vomit and human excrement, and started string up copper all over the place.  Not only did they hang copper rod's, but they lined his walls with pennies, plated his floor with copper and then continued to follow this guy around, throwing pennies everywhere he tried to go. What a stupid asshole!

 



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