Title:Night Work (1/1)

Author:SPRITTLEX

E-mail:SPRITTLEX@aol.com

Rating:PG-14(back to the land of my birth)

Disclaimer:Joss owns all Buffy stuff. I own the plot. the Stainless Steel Rat books(Excellent reads BTW) belong to Harry Harrison

Distribution:Ask if you're new to my stuff.

Feedback:I don't mind it.

Author's note: This is sort of in response to Zak's challenge to write what you think Xander did over the vacation. It is also an idea I just want to try out. If you like it I make it the first part of a larger story. XGG-NBA NOTE: sorry about the hold up on the Spike Xander thing. I'm getting writer's block every time I try and do it. I would like to give you an appetizer, though, It involves soapbox racers.

Spoilers:Xander being bad, kinda challengefic, set in the summer.

Summary:Xander has found a night job



I LIKE THE QUIET



You know, I am often amazed at the sheer volume of information that is just lying around, In libraries, magazines,and top secret files on corporate main frames. That's how I learned to do what I do, a little bit here and there from all sorts of places. For example the company that makes the alarm I'm disarming right now actually gives their old Tech manuals to local libraries. Doesn't anybody realize that thereare people like me in this world? Not that I'm complaining, I love them for it, but I do have to feel sorry for them. I know what you're thinking, Alexander LeVelle Harris, a thief, How in God's name did that happen? Well, I realized early on that Mrs. Harris' boy was not going to be a brain surgeon, so I decided that I would have to pick a vocation that was better suited to my creativity, and the fact that I'm a bit of a savant when it comes to electronics. Then I read a book called 'A Stainless Steel Rat is Born'. It all seemed pretty clear from there on out. Like I said, everything you ever need to know to be a criminal can be found in your local library. I started with locks. Once I mastered them I started on electronic security devices. I had a knack for those. Next came computer crime. She'll never know it, but Will couldn't hold a candle to my hacking ability. I've used this summer to hone my craft. Tonight I'm working on a monster score. I hired myself out to a local mob figure, Jimmy 'The Wrench' Gardino, to break into the regional FBI headquaters and wipe all of there records. Jimmy's a good guy. He helped me get set when I first got started in town. Ironically Jimy works for the Irish mob, says they pay better. I figure that the hundred and fifty grand thatJimmy is going to give me will keep me in beer and skittles for awhile, and I owe him a favor for all he's done for me.

* * *



YOU HAVE TO LOVE A MAN THAT LOVES HIS WORK

It's funny, but when I started this job, and I mean way back when I first started training myself, I was just in it for the money. Over the years, especially over this summer, I've come to love it just because I love it. I like to think of each job as a puzzle that has to be solved. Hell, I've even written up plans for jobs I didn't even pull. Most of those I sold to Jimmy, though. I think the only down side is that I'll never be able to tell the guys about it. I love Buffy, but I doubt she'd look to fondly on my chosen path. Will would pitch a monster fit, and Oz might even be forced to say something. Oddly, I like to believe Giles might think it was kind of cool. Well, maybe not Giles, but Ripper would think it was cool. Under that cool librarian exterior beats the heart of a street tough. I feel a huge smile spread across my face under my ski mask as I lower myself down the elevator shaft with my personal robotic winch system. I love this job, so many gadgets, so little time. I could never give this up, not even for Buff. Jimmy understands me, that's why we get along so well. He believes in the romantic ideal of 'Honor Among Thieves'. He actually once told me that he hoped I might be able to make it real. What can I say, we're a couple of half full boys. Fifth floor, my stop. This is the archives. I made sure thee were no open files on Jimmy and his boys, so all that the feds have should be here. I check my bag to make sure everything is secure. Then I pop the door and swing in.

* * *

UP IN SMOKE

I decided that the best way to do this is messy. I originally had planned on using some high end gear to wipe all of there computer files. Then I realized I could use a few Thermite charges and make it look like either it was an accident, or like any number of other people could have done it.

I'v been told by people that know of whiich they speak, that I am the best there is at what I do. I don't know if this is true or not, but I try to prove them right with every job. I set the charges carefully around the room. Each is hooked up to a radio detonator. I just have to push a button, and WHOOSH, everything is just dust in the wind. I ride back up on the winch. I then detach it, and put it back in my bag. I go to the edge of the roof and use the compressed air launcher to shoot a grappling hook to the next building over. I then hook the gun to the ledge. I now get to play Xander Wallenda, and cross the tightrope between the buildings. Once I'm on the other side I tug on the line in a special way, which brings the gun across. I put it back in the bag. While I'm in the bag I pull out my 'street clothes' and a remote control. Once I'm done changing I push the button. After a few moments, flames come pourig otu of the fifth floor windows. Another huge smile blossoms on my face as I head to the stairway. I love this job.

Well? Should I go on?