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Part two of Big Al Stud's RP...for the great intro type thing, read part one...
The camera then shows up inside a typical midwest Illinois young mens christian association's basketball gym. Inside the gym, some people are playing some half court basketball. There is Big Al Stud, some guy with bleached hair, but red roots starting to show. They appear to be on the same team, along with a shorter person with a stocking cap on his head, and a few piercings on his face. They are playing a guy with a rather large head, a guy who looks really good, and a guy who looks like dewy from malcom in the middle. They have been playing 3 on 3 for a while with Stud guarding the guy who looks good. The good guy gets the ball and then hits a three pointer right in Stud's eye. Stud utters some obscenities and checks up the ball. The bleached kid shouts out the score being 20-20, win by 2. Stud then passes to stocking cap boy, and gets the ball back and fakes a three. The good guy jumps up and Stud dribbles around him and hits the game winning three. After this there is much celebration by the winners, and eventually Stud slips out before he gets the 20oz All Sport poured on him. Stud then exits the YMCA where ICW camera crew is suprisingly waiting for Stud in his Silver 2001 Pontiac Firebird. Stud gets in the car and starts driving around and talking into the camera as if its nothing and hes been doing it his whole life, but hes only been doing it for about 2 years.
Big Al Stud: Yo, what up ugly fat hippie who holds the camera for me while I give my promos. OH really, well you suck also, anyway I can kick your ass. So lets just get back to buisness. Lets see where I left off earlier, well I basically just talked about Mr. S's bullshitness of booking this match, and told the world why I am going to win, because I am a great tag team and singles competitor. I gave my tag team history, and now I am going to give my history against each of the people who we are facing in the tag team triple threat title, fuck, match. Those were almost all tees!!! But who shall we start with, I think we will go in chronological order, and start with the people that Jonny Jacobsen, the first real movie star of ICW, just beat in...you guessed it guarapudo a major tag team match. At one point, this was the biggest match in the year 2001 in any federation. Then there was Max Powers vs Savage, and that was hardly even a fair compairison. So lets see, this is and was my first and only encounter with Julian and Blizzard, and lets just review how the match went down. Jonny started the match off with a bang by beating down that pretty boy looking Joe Max wannabe Julian. Johnny was really on a role and Julian was realing so Blizzard was tagged in. I didnt expect Johnny to just jump a woman, so she got a quick advantage, and almost won the match out of the shear niceness of Johnny 'The Star' Jacobsen. Then I came in, and I figured hell, Ive kicked Chyna's ass, Ive kicked Christian Devyne's ass, I've kicked and tapped Super Ho's ass, so if theres anything wrong with hitting a girl...too late. So I clocked Blizzard a couple times and brought Star Studded the advantage again. Then I'll admit it, Id like to pork Blizzard, and I got a little bit excited and/or overzelous and tried to make a slim move on Blizzard and she capitolized. But all in all I got up and hit the devastation device and covered Blizzard far before I was supposed to, and The undefeated streak of Blizzard and Julian came to an end. On the other hand, thanks to lack of all around good ness, a new streak begin, and not that same streak of naked ming chee. This streak is the undefeated streak of Star Studded, Johnny 'The Star' Jacobsen and Big Al Stud. Julian and Blizzard have no other matches with myself or Johnny, and they are about to get round 2 of their real schooling thanks in a large part to not only me, but the Star. I forsee more beatdowns on the duo of Blizzard and Julian, if u want it in alphabetical order for some reason. I forsee RWO losing their precious stables titles to the great and elite stable of IT...and for those of you who dont know because you all only care about me...Julian and Blizzard just happen to be in that stable known as the Rage World Order.
Big Al Stud: Speaking of the extremely crappy Rage World Order...another suprising member of this stable, is the leader...none other than Rage himself. Now, I was being sarcastic of course, because one would assume that Rage was in the Rage world order, since the egotistical cock sucker named the damn stable after himself. But then we move onto names, and we see that Rage has by far the crappiest and most unorigional name in ICW history. I mean Rage used to have a little bit of presteige in Internet Championship Wrestling. I mean we look back and see one of the best tag teams ever, aside from Big Al Stud and Patrick Webster...so we will call them the second best two man tag team of all time. This tag team was known as the Demolition, and it was composed of RAGE, and cage. No, not the same Rage we see sucking it up in the ICW ring today, parading around with the tag team belts like he is something special, or like his feces doesnt stink. Rage thinks just because he got lucky and beat some jobbers and made some sort of streak out of it, that he is god's gift to wrestling. I mean aside from a title, he gained nothing. He got no respect, no McDonald's commercial, nothing. Wait, come to think about it, he gained a huge ego....but thats nothing to brag on. Lets take a look back at the history of me and the crappiest Rage to ever give the name of Rage in ICW a bad name...Rage. When Rage first came to ICW, he beat me a couple times when he got lucky and they were tag matches with not as good partners as I currently have, so really they dont count. Then Rage, with a bunch of people, beat Main Event with many less people, for just the shear reason that they out numbered us, in a beach brawl for the stables titles. That wasnt really a good exibition of either mine or Rage's true skills in the ring, because it was on a beach, and it was esentially a glorified handicapped match...but what the hell, so is our match this Friday. But soon after my non glorious days of being paid to job to Rage, my career was nearly ended and definately cut short by injury. When I came back to ICW, my second match back was against Rage, in his favorite match for reasons that remain obscure...the dumpster match. Anyway, I kicked the shit out of Rage much like I will again this friday. Rage proved to be nothing when he was dominated by just one man in his special match, the fucking dumpster match. A damn match that I had never before taken part in, and he had clearly taken part in the match many many times in his sub-illustrious career. Then at the very next card Rage got another shut at trying to stop Big Al Stud from beating him again in a fatal fourway match. Again I knocked Rage like a crappy piece of wood in which I would knock on like knocking on wood. Alright, that wasn't very good, but I can't just hit a backspace button on words that I already said, can I? Alright I'll shut up. Basically that is my history with ever so crappy Rage, who likes to emerge nightly, sometimes twice on sundays.
Big Al Stud: So then I move onto my history, or lack there of...with the Shanghai Kid. Now, really there is only one event in which I squared off with the Shanghai Kid, to little success I might add. Now in this event, I had Shanghai twice in the night, and both times were to my dismay, and I am quick to admit that. This dismal event was Beach Brawl of 2001, back in July of 2001 of course...and one of the matches was the beach brawl match. But firstly El Oslo and SHanghai Kid faced Big Al Stud and Patrick Webster. In this particular match up, after Blu Cantrell's smash hit, aptly entitles Hit Em Up, played, Shanghai Kid made the match a Hardcore match, which Webster was so nice to accept for us, which we all know, I am not a hardcore wrestler. I am a damn fine exibiter of the lost art of submission backgrounds and technical perfection. So this match went on, hardcore rules...with nothing that I could do about it, I still had to please all of my fans. What happened was I jumped Shanghai Kid and immediately started to beat him, so like the coward that he was and still is over half a year later, he slid out of the ring to get in contact with weapons, perhaps the only way that he could and can still beat me. SO I was thinking, ah what the hell, if worse comes to worse, I can weild a chair slightly affective. I mean, I dont have one of the best chair shots, I perhaps have one of the worst chair shots, but hey...hitting someone in the head with a solid metal object usually can do the job, so I grabbed a chair and proceded to hit Shanghai with the chair, thus teaching him the valuable lesson that hardcore matches are bad, and you can really get hurt by them. All in all I was trying to help Shanghai with this learning experience. Again I started to take advantage, this time of El Oslo, untill Patrick decided he could now handle things on his own and decided to use illegal moves in a normal match, to my dismay. Then Shanghai came in and started beating up Webster, because thats just what happens always...so being the valiant tag team partner that I truly am, I came over to help Webster and I suplexed Shanghai Kid, and he just happened to feel what the best technical wrestler in ICW can do, when you casually land yourself on a chair. I mean I assure you that I, a great Canadian Hero, would not use hardcore tactics like that unless someone was plotting to get weapons like in the earlier case, this was shearly coincidence that Skid landed back first right through the chair. Esentially, I was left to do what was seemingly my chore in this match, while my man...Shanghai Kid rolled out of the ring. I had to turn around and help out that little mooch Webster, because EL Oslo was going for the kill. So, I was picking the the chair up, to simply move the chair out of the ring...cause my great fans wwant to see an entertaining match, not a hardcore match...and El Oslo dropkicked the chair right into my face and tried to pin me. Of course I kicked out, or I would have if Patrick did not make the non needed save. So apparently Shanghai Kid grabbed a chair, like the selfish little wench that he is and hit me with the chair. And then he hit Webster, and I WOULD HAVE HELPED HIM, but because he was a selfish mooch and didnt help me, he was S.O.L. Shanghai then hit him in the head, and hit the Shanghai Drop for the victory. Shanghai Kid did not pin me, nor could he ever pin me, as I have kicked out of his little Shanghai Drop before, and as far as I know...I am the only man to ever do so. After that a couple men wrestled for the title that I made famous, and Skid is currently dragging down, the United States Title. After that was the infamous second meating, a month later. I am sorry I said it was the same night, cause it wasnt. At Escape From Reason...Shanghai Kid has just a week little match with that jobber Brian Brisbane, and was not tired, but me...I had to save all of my energy for the main event, which I obviously did not do a very good job of. In the Elimination Stables match, I thought I would get some revenge at the Shanghai Kid, but he decided he would be better off with a signles career...so there was no battle between us...leaving a disapointed me, and a worry free Shanghai Kid, who did not get my retribution. This leaves 6 months of anger, anger at Shanghai Kid, anger at El Oso, anger at Patrick Webster...all for losing the tag titles, this anger has been boiling up and is ready to blow Friday Night in my first tag team title shot since losing the belts in July. Shanghai Kid...I'll see you in the ring and you have no idea whats comming to you.
The camera has faded from Stud talking while he drove around the midwest town, and he is now magically in the United Center in Chicago Illinois, like the true midwesternian that he is. He is just chilling in the back, in his own person dressing room (It pays to be in good with the commish) Stud is just lounging around in a Chicago Bulls Ron Mercer jersey and his wrestling gear, getting ready for his big tag team title match, physically and mentally. Stud notices the camera men are in his locker room, like most often...as if someone notified him that it was time to start his promo, his sits up straight, sets down his pepsi, and starts to talk...
Big Al Stud: Well it seems as if my fans and the rest of the general public just cannot get enough of Big Al Stud. Certain higherups have not requested, but demanded that I cut yet another promo because one and I suppose its now a half, dont cut it here in ICW. Apparently I am supposed to have three solid promos, which are going to technically only be three, but the question is will there be more to come in the great scheme of Stud speaking? The world may never know, untill Friday about 4 central. Anyway, first and foremost I want to address something I was not told to address, and that is the fact that Volcano is yet to accept my challenge for a rematch at that IC Title. Now, onto what I have been told to talk about, me feelings on my opponents in this tag team title triple threat...
Big Al Stud: Well, lets start with Julian. Julian seems to be a pretty good wrestler, and I dont really have any beef with him. Actually I can say some simple facts about things that I dont like about the guy. I am not going to say hey Julian you suck and I am going to kick your ass. But Julian, I don't think you are as technically sound in the ring as I do...and quite frankly you dont seem like my kind of guy...and no not in that way. I would appreciate it if everyone got their mind out the preverbial gutter, so to speak and think logically here. Anyway, Julian you are not my kind of guy, for the simple fact that you come off as kind of a weirdo. No not the kind of guy who voulenteers to run the slide projector every day in class for their favorite teacher, which happens to be all of them. But you come off as more of the boring weirdo, that frankly I wouldn't want to be chilling with in my last five minutes of my life. Now this is nothing against you personally, and really what does this all matter many people are probablly thinking. And for that simple question I have a very simple, yet logical answer for it. My answer is that it does not matter, there is nothing personally against Julian, and I really was just rambling on. Frankly, Julian, you are a good competitor and I am going to be sure that I do not over look you. And even if you werent a great competitor, you would still have one thing going for you that could hekp you out...Bizzard.
Big Al Stud: Now, I am not saying that Blizzard is a much better competitor than you, nor am I saying that she is good at all. What I am saying is also not that she is bad...what I am saying that Blizzard is one fine looking woman, and rumor in the back is that you guys are an item, so never again will I try to kiss her in the middle of the ring...cause that kinda shows you up a little but Jule. But Blizzard, I think perhaps...but not to be a male shovanist...that you would be better off fighting other women in ICW. There have been come great competitors in ICW like Super Ho and Christian Devyne to name a couple of the more recent ones, and I know that I for one would night mind seeing you guys grapple in some random form of sexual match, and I doubt that many would mind. But you are wrestling against me Friday night...and there is nothing I can do about it. No act of god is going to stop you from doing what you want to do, and you know what...I have hit a woman before, and I will be forced to do it again. If not just to win the match, it is just showing that I am not at all sexist and I try to keep women and men on an equal basis at the work place. Hell, in this case, being the great guy that I am, I will bust you from ear to ear and beat the living piss out of you...just to show my character...
Big Al Stud just looks into the camera and does his little smile, at the thought of how good of a person he really is...or at least what he thinks he is.
Big Al Stud: Yeah, I am a great man...I heard I was going to be in the top three running in TIME's man of the year poll. But I know one man who is not going to be...and that is Rage. For one, the guy is ugly, and wasnt blessed with these beautiful looks that I was...before that bastard Tom Hanks stole them for that movie where he couldnt walk, and he played ping pong, what a joke. But seriously Rage, you have some ego. I mean, if I could buy this guy for what he thinks hes worth and sell him for what he is worth...ah shit. HOld up, if I could buy this guy for what he is worth, and sell him to someone for what he thinks he is worth, i would make a shit load of money. But you know what? I dont have to resort to petty selling of goods, because by beating Rage in the ring tonight I will be making a shit load of money. I mean, with another title reign, my third tag team title reign...do you know who much money Big Al Stud will be worth? I mean think about it, my value alone will skyrocket, and we all know that for just a newbie, Johnny Jacobsen is very valuable as he could always just fall back in his movie career, and from what I hear...Spike Lee is interested in using BIG AL STUD, in his next "joint." But we get back to the subject of Rage, and we can just ksip over him not being TIME's man of the year. We can get down to his wrestling ability, which is more of a hardcore ability for the man who held the hardcore title for a breif time...unlike myself. I mean I could go on and on about the benefits of knowing great counter holds over how to swing a lead pipe. I could talk about all of the great oldschool wrestlers and how they could dominate teh hardcore champion jokers like that norman smiley fellow. I mean do you think a Ricky Steamboat could beat a Bryan Knobbs? Yes of course he could, because technical wrestling is and forever will always remain supreme in the world of wrestling. But thats not what I am going to talk about Rage for, in fact...this whole topic disgusts me and reminds me of the dirty, filthy, disgusting, trash filled dumpster that I almost went into, and put Rage in instead and how he didnt wash for like a month...sooooo I'll move onto the Shanghai Kid.
Big Al Stud: I dont have as big a problem with the Shanghai Kid as I do with Rage. I mean his ego is slightly smaller, and sure he cuts promos that stray way off subject like talking about HATE, and old stable, and talking about King Crasher. But there is one thing that the Shanghai Kid has that many wrestlers don't and never will. This is something very beneficial to his career, or at least it could be. It is not every day that you hear me compliment a wrestler...but right now I am going to do it, so record this moment forever in your minds or VCRs. And you DVD richboys are out of luck cause here I go...when I look at the Shanghai Kid, I see a younger Big Al Stud. Now, after that blockbuster...please allow me to explain why I said that. I mean you look back at Big Al Stud, I mean sure I didnt really climb the ICW's supposed ladder in the same way that the Shanghai Kid did, but he is somewhat following in my footsteps anyhow. I mean we see that Shanghai Kid as already a multiple time tag team champion, much like I was. The first time with a nearly complete waste of space in El Oso...his Andrew Smooth. And the second time with a good wrestler, kind of...Rage. Rage is his Patrick Webster. But too bad for him he won't have a reign nearly as long as myself and Patrick Webster did. But the similarities dont stop there. Shanghai Kid is a former, and a once great champion of Canada, and he respected the Big Al Stud Title you see around my waste like old times. Shanghai Kid also is hoping to one day be a world champion, like I used to be and am again. But there is one polar opposite, Shanghai Kid thinks he is the greatest United States Champion of all time, and I am the greatest United States Champion of all time. I mean I know he is just trying to follow in my footsteps again, and they say immitation is the sincerest form of flattery...but enough is enough and that is wear I cdraw the line. Shanghai Kid you are a crappy world champion and you defend against jobbers like Max Powers. But Still Vman, I'll give you a little bit of props, you have beaten these non US Title material opponents. I mean thank god your not letting 2 or 3 other men bring down the value of my great work for that title, it is only you bringing the title down. But yee with little faith...has little faith. But I do have some faith Shanghai, when I look at you, I see that perhaps you can bring yourself up soon and then bring some prestigue to the asian title...whenever you bring it in.
Big Al Stud: Lets get down to another fact...no its not that The Shanghai Kid is really ugly and he wears a mask to cover it up. I mean we all know he wears the mask because he has a small penis...obviously, but thats another story. I mean the real story that I want to talk about, is that there is no real connection in my opinion between Asians R Us over there with the tag team titles. I mean, its not like they have fueded with each other in the past, and I think that is because both are truly afraid to face each other because they dont like real challenges. But who says that Rage won't high-tail right out of my United Center at the first signs of trouble. Shanghai, do you really think that Rage wouldnt leave you high and dry just to save his own ass? Cause we have all heard the way that Rage talks, and we see the name of the stable he is in. The RWO. Rage is an egotistical, selfish, self-centered, no talent leach and if he can't use you to keep the titles he will turn on you. And Rage, do you really think that the Shanghai Kid wont just leave you like you are nothing to him, because that is exactlly what you are to him. You are nothing to the Shanghai Kid, he has said that he doesnt really care about the RWO in the back. And do you really thinks he gives a shit about keeping the tag titles? I mean what happens if he loses? He still has the United States Title to fall back on, unlike you who has nothing but the pathetic stables titles. I mean look back at when the Unholy Alliance faced Main Event, Shanghai Kid left you right before the heat of battle, to do what he felt would better his own personal career. And the US Title will better his career more than the tag titles, and he has that no matter what. But me and Johnny are far more dangerous and hungry than anyone else in this match, because we have nothing to lose and everything to gain. I mean we have no singles titles or even stables titles to fall back on if we lose. I mean I dont see either of us losing, but you realize that we want and need these titles, because this is all that we have to go for at this point...and for that reason alone, I know that I can trust Johnny and he can trust me...
Big Al Stud: Now, this randomly brings me to my next tid bit of information to speak of...the star care series match. For some reason prior to this moment, the whole match between me and Rage slipped my mind. Of course, this was the third straight time that I not only beat, but dominated Rage in that ICW ring, and what brought this up? My friend Rage's first promo, which I am also going to discuss a little bit. Basically this promo was hardly even dedicated to myself as well as my partner, and a little bit about the team that we are facing in this match. But Ill talk about what Rage said just to me, in the three verbal stanzas he talked about the match in. First he talked about all of my reigns and how under rated I am, and I agree with it all, but this is of course, no time for sucking up to greatest US and Canadian Champ of all time, because I'm not going to be letting up at all. He then just talked alot of good talks about how I beat him, and how the fates will change this time, but then came part duex. In this one he basically trashed the great state of Chicago, and for that the "man", and I use that term loosely will pay. It does not matter what he said with the rest of the damn promo, because just for that he will have to answer to me...tonight tonight, its Rage and me tonight. But thats not entirely true, because Shanghai Kid...whom I have never beaten in a match in ICW is also there. And of course we cannot forget to include two capable combatants, Julian and Blizzard. They have a chance but its slim, as they are comming off the rebound of losing to Star Studded just three short days ago. So you know what, me and Johnny Jacobsen, its cool I assure you, but we will beat every member of the RWO tonight. Except Volcano, and you my friend are just the next pawn for me to playin this big game of human chess we call ICW...
talk about starcade series and then respond to his RP
Stud then stops talking and picks up his pepsi and starts drinking out of it again. The camera then pans away from Stud, and points to the hardwood floor, and then to the door. Then the camera fades to...BLACK
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