Subject: What software version are you running? I'm currently running the latest version of GirlFriend and I've been having some problems lately. I've been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 forever as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I've tried have always conflicted with it. I hear that DrinkingBuddies won't crash if GirlFriend is run in background mode and the sound is turned off. But I'm embarrassed to say I can't find the switch to turn the sound off. I just run them separately, and it works okay. Girlfriend also seems to have a problem co-existing with my Golf program, often trying to abort Golf with some sort of timing incompatibility. I probably should have stayed with GirlFriend 1.0, but I thought I might see better performance from GirlFriend 2.0. After months of conflicts and other problems, I consulted a friend who has had experience with GirlFriend 2.0. He said I probably didn't have enough cache to run GirlFriend 2.0, and eventually it would require a Token Ring to run properly. He was right - as soon as I purged my cache, it uninstalled itself. Shortly after that, I installed GirlFriend 3.0 beta. All the bugs were supposed to be gone, but the first time I used it, it gave me a virus anyway. I had to clean out my whole system and shut down for a while. I very cautiously upgraded to GirlFriend 4.0. This time I used a SCSI probe first and also installed a virus protection program. It worked okay for a while until I discovered that GirlFriend 1.0 was still in my system. I tried running GirlFriend 1.0 again with GirlFriend 4.0 still installed, but GirlFriend 4.0 has a feature I didn't know about that automatically senses the presence of any other version of GirlFriend and communicates with it in some way, which results in the immediate removal of both versions. The version I have now works pretty well, but there are still some problems. Like all versions of GirlFriend, it is written in some obscure language I can't understand, much less reprogram. Frankly I think there is too much attention paid to the look and feel rather than the desired functionality. Also, to get the best connections with your hardware, you usually have to use gold-plated contacts. And I've never liked how GirlFriend is totally "object-oriented." A year ago, a friend of mine upgraded his version of GirlFriend to GirlFriendPlus 1.0, which is a Terminate and Stay Resident version of GirlFriend. He discovered that GirlFriendPlus 1.0 expires within a year if you don't upgrade to Fiancee 1.0. So he did, but soon after that, he had to upgrade to Wife 1.0, which he describes as a huge resource hog. It has taken up all his space, so he can't load anything else. One of the primary reasons he decided to go with Wife 1.0 was because it came bundled with FreeSexPlus. Well, it turns out the resource allocation module of Wife 1.0 sometimes prohibits access to FreeSexPlus, particularly the new Plug-Ins he wanted to try. On top of that, Wife 1.0 must be running on a well warmed-up system before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with MotherInLaw which has an automatic pop-up feature he can't turn off. I told him to try installing Mistress 1.0, but he said he heard if you try to run it without first uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.0 won't install anyway because of insufficient resources. Indian Girl Jokes Q: What do you call an Indian Girl with half a brain? A: Gifted! Q: Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, an Indian girl, and a good looking Indian girl are walking down the street when they spot a $10 bill. Who picks it up? A: The Indian Girl. why? There is no such thing as Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, or a good looking Indian girl. Q: How do you drown an Indian girl? A: Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool. Q: What do Indian girls and dog poop have in common? A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up. Q: How do you get an Indian girl to marry you? A: Tell here your a doctor Q: What is the difference between an Indian girl and jello? A: Jello moves when you eat it. Q: What an Indian girls ideal house? A: One with no kitchen and bedroom Q: What is the difference between a good looking Indian girl and Bigfoot? A: Bigfoot has been spotted. Q: What do you call a good looking Indian girl? A: An indicator of a really bad hangover. Q: Why do Indian girls have legs? A1: To get between the bedroom and the kitchen. A2: So they don't leave trails, like little snails. Q: How do you get an Indian girl to laugh at a joke on Friday ? A: Tell it to her on Monday. Q: What can strike an Indian girl without her even knowing it? A: A thought. Q: What do you call a basement full of Indian girls? A: A whine cellar. Q: what do you call an Indian girl with 2 brain cells? A: pregnant Q: Why did the Indian girl cross the road? A: Never mind that! What was she doing out of the bedroom?!? Q: How do you confuse an Indian girl? A: You don't. They're born that way. Q: Did you here about the Indian girl who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed. Q: What do you call an Indian girl in an institution of higher learning? A: A visitor. Q: Why should Indian girls not be given coffee breaks? A: It takes too long to retrain them. Q: Why do Indian girls work seven days a week? A: So you don't have to retrain them on Monday. Q: What do you say to a Indian girl that won't give in? A: "Have another beer." Q: How many Indian girls does it take to change a light bulb? A1: One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her. A2: Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, "Daaady!" Q: What's the difference between trash and a Indians girl? A: Trash get picked up at least once. Q: Why did the Indian girl only change her baby's diapers monthly? A: The box said "For 20 pounds." Q: How did the Indian girl try to kill the bird? A: She threw it off a cliff. Q: Why was the Indian girl proud to finish her jigsaw puzzle in 6 months? A: The box said "2-4 years." Q: How does an Indian girl high-5? A: She smacks herself in the forehead. Q: What's the difference between a Indian girl and a terrorist? A: You can negotiate with a terrorist. Q: What's a Indian girls favorite wine? A: Dadddddy I waaaannnnt to go to Maaaimmmi Q: What did the Indian girl say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase? A: "It's OK Daddy, I'm not hurt." Q: What did the Indian girl say to the physicist? A: "Why, I just _love_ nuclear fission! What do you use for bait?" Q: How do Indian girls braincells die ? A: Alone. Q: Why didn't the Indian girl want a window seat on the plane? A: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much. Q: Why did the Indian girl cross the road. R: I don't know. A: neither did she. Q: What do you get when you offer an Indian girl a penny for her thoughts? A: Change. Three Indian girls were walking along the beach and one stubbed here toe on a bottle, they wanted to see what was inside so they opened it and out poped a genie. He was grateful for letting him out so he decided to grant them all one wish each. The first Indian girl said she wanted to be smart. so the genie made here smart. The second girl said that she wanted to be smarter than the first girl, so the genie gave her unbounded though. The third girl saw what happened to the other two and wanted to be smarter than both of the previous girls. The genie said that was the easiest wish of them all he turned her into an Indian Guy.