So, dude... After like a couple of months, I've realized that I have all these quotes that I've been wanting to add to my page. So here they are. But before you get to my quotes. I need you guys to read the funniest story I have ever read... go here: http://web.mit.edu/naptime/www/stupid.txt
I don't know how many of you guys remember this page, but I had it on my old, old, old homepage. Remember the http://mira.homepage.com days? Well maybe not. But it's back when everything was navy background with white words and I experimented with the hover colorchanging links and everything was layed out on Frontpage Express.... Before my experiments with frames... Ehh, still clueless? Never mind. :) Anyway, this is just a small glimpse into the funny things that come out of the mouths of people that I know. Unfortunately, I am not always thinking of my website, so I am unable to record all the dumb things that come out of my friends' mouths (and let me say, they say a lot of dumb things. Haha, oh well, you're loss I guess... But enjoy! And if you have anything you want me to add, just e-mail me!
Mira: A sad Mira is not a happy Mira
Mira: (drowsily) Oh! I had a thought. Oh. I forgot it. Oh no! But... it was a smart thought... It was a good thought. Oh no. What was my thought? (so on for another 10 minutes) Oh, I'm going to be stuck on this thought for a while... But it was a good thought. (Amy starts singing "I Drive Myself Crazy" by 'N Sync) Oh! I remembered my thought! Oh! Uh oh... (Mira starts laughing) It wasn't a very smart though... (keeps laughing) Uh oh... It was a stupid thought.
Mira: I feel kinda stupid now.
Amy: I can't imagine why, Mira... Rats, no, it can't be.
Amy: If a fly guy walks by, I'm dropping my pants.
Jen Chen: Did you know that you need a modem to get on America Online? It said "Insert disk and run" so that's what I did.
Amy: (whacks her forehead because Mira started singing "Please Don't Go") Uh oh, I think I popped my skin disease.
Mira: (On phone with Gloria) I think you should do your paper on Khruschev.
Amy: (in the background of Mira's house) She's going to ask you who Khruschev is.
Gloria: What's a Krueshub?
Amy: You you you you, why's it always about you? It's not about you. It's about me. Me, me, me, me, me. It's all about me.
Gloria: What? What? I can't hear you, my glasses aren't on.
Ik Tae: (Looking at Edmund's Ultimate jersey that Amy is wearing) Oh yeah! I forgot that you and your brother have the same last name!
Edmund: You guys are so immature... I'm going to go spit in your sago now.
Amy: (to Edmund) Do you love me? ... (5 minutes later) ... Hello?!
Mira: (whispering during movie preview) Amy, I don't get it. What does "Zoo Cigarrettes" mean?
Amy: You idiot, it's "200 Cigarrettes."
Mira: I'm a dorkus maximus.
Mira: What was that old movie called with the dinosaurs? There was a dinosaur called... Littlefoot!!
Amy: Yeah, that movie with the dinosaur who played with a leaf! ... (an hour later) ... I remember! His name was Littlefoot!
Mira: I said that before.
Amy: I thought you said that he had a little foot.
Mira: I'm not assuming. To assume makes an ass out of you and me.
Amy: (5 minutes later) Ohh! I finally get it! (giggles) I get it! I get it!
Renée: Is this tacky? Cuz it's Gloria's.
Wenni: Bye Mira, see you later.
Mira: Bye Mira, see you later.
Gloria: (staring at Daniel's stomach, six pack) Can I see it?
Amy: (for Gloria) Can I touch it?
Viv's Mom: Is that Amy's boyfriend?
Viv's Mom: Oh. Is that your boyfriend?
Viv's Mom: Okay because I didn't think you would go out with a guy like that.
Mira: (measuring Amy's height) Amy, stand up straight!
Amy: I AM!
Daniel: What the phone number for Port Authority?
Mira: I dunno. Try 411.
Daniel: Oh, that's the number?
John: My friend said that you look like a Hong Kong superstar.
Mira: What does a Hong Kong superstar look like?
Janet Kim: Do all Asians have jaundice?
Mira: (to Amy scratching her skin disease) Don't scratch! It sounds like you're scratching dry skin. (Amy continues to scratch) Eww! Eww! Stop!!
Amy: It smells like wet rain.
Mira: (after reading that) What smells like wet rain?
Amy: You don't get that do you? (Mira looks at her) ...all rain is wet.
Mira: Oh yeah...
Gloria: How many quarters are in a game?
John: ... Stupid Italian goon.
Eric Shih: Teeheehee... I'm not a ditz! You are! (to Mira)
Amy's Mom: (In Chinese to Amy's dad) This tastes like crap. Here, you eat it.
Mira: He's tall... he's asian. He's kinda doofy.
Megan: (at 100 meters in the air) I hate you, Gloria.
Ellen: I cleaned the screen of my TV so that I could see his face better. (referring to Allan Houston)... (later upon reading what she said) Actually, I cleaned it to kiss his face.
Mira: (talking about "Meet Joe Black") We wanna see his back.
Edmund: Sure, I'm sure that his back is the only thing you want to see.
Mira: No, no! It really is!
Amy: The sad thing is, that's the truth.
Jisun: (to Amy) Did I just hear you say teehee? You've been around Mira too long.
Great Adventure Man: Which one of you is going to pull the rip cord? Amy, Megan, Gloria: What's the rip cord?
Josh: Steven spells funny.
Dinah: Do you guys wanna hear a joke? I made it up myself.
All: (groan) Okay. What?
Dinah: I was talking to my friend and he said "Frankly, I don't want to." And I said "Bobly, I do."
Amy: My Nuts is in good condition.
(Mira: (asking Amy about the quote) Good condition or perfect condition?
Amy: Nope it can't be because my nuts aren't perfect.)
(After reading that conversation)
Arnold: Amy's got balls?
Amy: No no, I have nuts.
Amy: I was not giving him a blowjob, I just couldn't get up.
Larry: (to Amy) I don't know. All I know is that you owe me 70 cents and I can see your cleavage.
Vivian: John's the head penox.
Amy: What about Tomwoo? (Talking about Tomo. Thinking about Namwoo?)
Mira: I almost said "Am I the only one with healthy balls?" but I stopped myself.
Grace: (while waiting for a really slow elevator to come up) Maybe I should press up because we're up here.
Mira: That's like spaying a cat after it's gone through menopause.
Ellen: Where are you getting this from?
Ellen: These dumb jokes.
Mira: My head.
Mira: I wanna go to France.
Vivian: Why don't you go to Ireland? My school went there.
Mira: Because I can't speak Irish.
Vivian: (laughing) There is no such thing as Irish. They speak English there.
Mira: Oh. I can't... Wait, I almost said "I can't speak that either."
Mira: I'm hungry.
Josh: Eat me.... I meant something.
Amy: (after motioning to Edmund underwater) I just wanted to hear if you could see me.
Amy: (after her trip to Puerto Rico) Rump roast!!! ... (later) ... I can't believe my butt's fried.
(once again, same time period)
Amy: My butt is sunburned.
Jae: Oh. Eww, what were (weren't) you wearing?
Amy: I was swimming.
Jae: But how does your butt burn IF it's covered?
Amy: I'm just *sniff* unlucky.
Jae: Amy wears kinky swimwear.
Amy: (reason for giving Larry a blowjob) I was trying to find the floor!
Vivian: (at a restaurant) Hahaha! You're sitting next to Mira!
Amy: Oh fart. But who's sitting across from her?
Vivian: Uh oh.
Arnold: Larry, you said you're last haircut looked good I'm afraid to ask.
Amy: I was just kissing.
Vivian: I like sitting on things because it feels comforting...
Amy: I just bought a $5 shirt, 3/4 sleeve at GAP. Guess how much?
Mira: Um. $5?
Amy: How'd you know?
Amy: I feel cheated on by my best friend and my husband.
Mira: I'm not cheating on you.
Amy: Yeah, you are! You're cheating on me with Arnold!
Amy: Mira's going on a date... with a boy.
Edmund: You're only supposed to go on a date with girls! At least that's what I always did... and all of my guy friends.
Edmund: Mom if I don't come home, you don't have to wake me up at 9 tomorrow morning.
Amy: I need a screw. I'm down on my knees looking for a screw.
(On New Year's Eve)
Mira: 7 minutes left!
Steve: Damn! That means my calendar has run out!
Arny and Amy on colleges: Do Purdue and Colgate have anything to do with the chicken and toothpaste companies?
Mr. Wray: Every teacher is bribeable to a certain point. You give me enough so I can get down to retirement..... (Aww! I miss him!!! He was such a cute bumbly man!)
Arno: I'm not sure if I have a good cock; I might hafta buy a new one.
Amy: Oh yeah, I forgot I'm easily replaced. xP
Arnold: Hahaha. No, you're just easy.
Amy: I want ice cream but I'm freezing my balls off.
Mira: But you don't have balls.
Amy: I know, but if I had balls they'd be frozen off.
Amy: (to Arnold) Stop shoving your monkey into my mouth.
Steven: Hey, I'm not the one drooling over 98°. (5 seconds later) No, wait, yes, I am.
Arnold: So what did you do today?
Arnold: You're studying for them again?!?!
Amy: No, I sat-- like sitted.
Ellen: I dug his balls really well... I had to get down really, really low to dig them.
Gloria: (to Amy) You know the only person I would crap with is you.
Dave Moy: You better tell Amy to do what she's gotta do... cuz I won't... I'm not one to tell others what to do.
John: (babbling about health and stuff) [I am] a fat boy ... a fat boy that doesn't like himself as much as he can ... a fat boy that wants to change ... to be more confident, more energetic ... to be stronger ... a boy that wants to show his potential ... and help others to like themselves ... to show them their potential ... to show them the way, once I get to where I want to be...
Mira: Hehehe. Okie... You just made me want to eat cake.
John: You're a big idiot.
Amy: I like sea otters!
Dave Moy: Werd... They`re mad cute.
Amy: Uh huh.
Dave: Steal me one!
Amy: (laughs) I'll try?
Amy: Heehee. I'll just lure it out with food or something
Dave: (laughs) You won`t have food... You would eat it first.
Amy: (laughs) Noooooo it's too cute too eat!
Dave: ...I meant the food.
Dave: I hate working.
Amy: I can tell... You're getting grouchy already.
Dave: Haha, well at least blue collar work. I hate manual labor. If I were pregnant, I wouldn't push.
Amy: Haha, what?!
Amy: You`re such a freak.
Dave: I would just let the sucker come out on its own.
Mira: Amy's my boyfriend.
John: Really... If she was male, you'd be highschool sweethearts.
Mira: Nah if she were male, I wouldn't be dating her.
John: I can say, without any hesitation, that Robert Downey, Jr. looks pretty damn good in those glasses.
Gloria: Jerry! (pointing to Jackson) Aren't you the guy that's the nicest person in the world?
Renée: (calls Amy's house, a few days after Amy's birthday) Hello Amy, can I talk to Viv?
Amy: Why do you wanna talk to Viv?
Renée: 'Cuz I do.
Amy: Oh, is this about the surprise thing? Am I getting another surprise party?! I am, aren't I?!?!?!!
Steve: So Mira... I must say that I am very mad at you......... Hey, don't ignore me when I'm mad at you!
Renee: Be nice to her, I love Mira.
Steve: I love her, too!
Renee: I love her more!
Steve: No, you don't!
Renee: I DO!
Steve: I love her more!
Renee: Who do you love more MIRA?!...MIRA!!!
(Viv and me, talking about Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back)
Viv: Are you sure it comes out tomorrow? Because I was pretty sure it comes out Friday...
Mira: Positive... Isn't tomorrow Friday? *laughs*
Viv: Yeah... Ha...
Jae: You live WHERE??
Renee: You work WHERE?!
(after learning that they live/work right next to each other... Guess who got yelled at next?)
Glen: I prefer a mike hard.
Wakana: (to Amy) I cannot remember you forgot!
John: Tuna from the can, my good friend.
Mira: Ice creeeeam time.
John: Never let others tell me how nasty you are.
John: Cuz you are so beautiful...to meeeee~
John: Talking to my tuna.
Arnold: I'm a nerd now. It's sick... If I weren't me, I'd poke me with a stick and laugh at me.
Mira: So are you a good dancer?
John: No... I have no rhythm whatsoever but I have five months to learn what rhythm is.
Mira: Hahaha, okay.
John: Do you dance well?
Mira: Not well, but not badly...
John: You're so full of yourself! Mira: How was that being full of myself??? John: "blah blablah blah blah....I don't suck at anything... blablah blah blah.."
Alice: (doing the "quack" part of the chicken dance> Yummy yummy chomp chomp!
Alice: I think I'm going to shoot myself.
(5 seconds later) Alice: This is the part where you should say NO!!!
Mira: (in a monotonous voice) No.
(trying to find a place to play Scrabble)
Mira: Let's play in my room so I can stalk Kazaa.
Thomas: Who's Kazaa?
Mira: I like how you assume my stalking someTHING, is stalking someONE.
Amy: Elli braided my hair last night, heehee, so it's kinda wavy now.
Arnold: Amy!!! Please tell me you're not trying to look like Mira.
(Alice throws her keys at Thomas)
Thomas: Alice! You hit my kidneys!
(Thomas looks at his camera with a puzzled look on his face)
Thomas: What is this red light? And why is it flashing at me?
(It was the timer, and it went off in his face)
(During the Superbowl Playmates Fear Factor)
Thomas: What is a Playmate?
Return to [ blahness ] Last updated: 02.10.02. from the University of ichiga!