Norm-isms

Sam: Hey, what's happening, Norm?
Norm: It's a dog eat dog world, Sammy, and I'm wearing Milkbone underwear.

Sam: What're you up to, Norm?
Norm: My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall.

Sam: What's up, Norm?
Norm: My nipples.  It's freezing out there.

Woody: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Let's talk about what's going in Mr. Peterson.

Woody: Mr. Peterson, Jack Frost nipping at your nose?
Norm: Yep.  Now let's get Joe Beer nipping at my liver.

Norm: Women.  You can't live with 'em... pass the beer nuts.

Coach: Can I draw you a beer, Norm?
Norm: No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one.

Coach: How about a beer, Norm?
Norm: Hey I'm high on life, Coach. Of course, beer is my life.

Coach: What's the story, Norm?
Norm: Thirsty guy walks into a bar. You finish it.

Coach: What's shakin', Norm?
Norm: All four teeth and a couple of chins, Coach.

Coach: What would you say to a beer, Normie?
Norm: Daddy wuvs you.

Sam: What's new, Normie?
Norm: Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach. They're demanding beer!

Norm: Morning, Sammy.
Sam: Little early for a beer, isn't it?
Norm: So, float a corn flake in it.

Norm: [coming in from the rain] Evening, everybody.
All: Norm!
Sam: Still pouring, Norm?
Norm: That's funny, I was about to ask you the same thing.

Norm: Woody, you in pain, buddy?
Woody: No, I was just thinking.
Norm: Yeah, well, the first time is always the worst.

Woody: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: A flashing sign in my gut that says, ''Insert beer here.''

Woody: What's the story, Norm?
Norm: ''Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer.''

Frasier: ...I'm not getting any.
Norm: You got off easy.

Quotes & Insults

Coach: Cheers.   Just a sec.  Is there an Ernie Pantusso here?
Sam: That's you, Coach.
Coach: Speaking.

Coach: How come you and Vera never had any kids?
Norm: I can't, Coach.
Coach: Gee, I'm sorry, Norm.
Norm: I look at Vera, and I just can't.

Norm: You wanna know what I love?
Sam: Beer Norm?
Norm: Yeah, I'll have a quick one.

Norm: See ya in the morning, I guess, huh?
Sam: Yeah.  I may be a little late.
Norm: Ah, that's okay.  I had a key made.

Frasier: Hello in there, Cliff.  Tell me... what color is the sky in your world?

Frasier: Woody, you must be an idiot savant!
Woody: Yeah, but I cover it by smiling alot.

Frasier: And Lilith.... is a good woman. Strong. Durable. Reliable.
Norm: She'd make one hell of a radial tire, huh?

Carla: Oh come on, Sam, you know my philosophy.  If you can't say something nice... say it about Diane.

Diane: What could be more enjoyable than opening your heart with holiday cheer?
Carla: Opening yours with a can opener?

Cliff: I'm ashamed God made me a man.
Carla: I don't think God's doing a lot of bragging about it either.

Cliff: Hello, Pierre.  Yeah.  Cliff Clavin over here at Cheers.   Heeeyyy that's Mr. Weenie to you, pal.

Cliff: ...I spent a good part of my youth in a laboratory.
Carla: And you'd still be there today if the chimpanzee hadn't taught you how to open your cage.

Diane: What can be more enjoyable than opening your heart with holiday cheer?
Carla: Opening yours with a can opener?

Diane: I'm sorry I'm late, but you'll be delighted when you hear why.
Carla: We were just delighted that you were late.

Carla: You're not cooking up something that is gonna humiliate my friends and make them look stupid, are ya?
Rebecca: Why, yeah.
Carla: How can I help?

Carla: Aw, come on, Sam. You know my philosophy -- if you can't say anything nice, say it about Diane.

Cliff: Just like all women -- if they're not turning down your proposal of marriage, they're accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingere changing room.

Lilith: Do you realize that when I publish my book on Borderline Psychosis, every penny I've spent in this bar will be deductable.