A kid is sitting on the side of the road, holding a bottle. A priest comes along and asks what he has in the bottle.

"Turpentine," the kid replies. "The most powerful thing in the universe."

The priest studies the bottle reflectively for a moment, then says, "Son, the most powerful thing in the universe is holy water. If you rub it on a pregnant woman's stomach, she'll pass a baby boy."

The kid says, "Shit, that ain't nothin'. You rub this on a cat's arse, it'll pass a motorcycle!"

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