"What are you doing?" he demanded.
"I'm 30 years old, fat, ugly and I've never even had a date. There's no way I'll ever get married so this electronic device is my substitute husband."
Several days later the daughter comes home from work and sees her dad sitting in a chair watching TV. He's got a beer in one hand and her vibrator in the other.
"What's going on?" she asks.
"Just having a beer with my son-in-law." he says.