Meet the Jack Face Records Staff.

	This is yours truly, Herman Jackface. The man with a dream, the man who started it all. Herman is very proud of his achievements here with his label. The future is looking very well for this bright, young, handsome lad. He hopes to take back the music industry, run for President, and conquer the world. I'd say this is a quite a guy.
	This little vixen is Jenny. She's Mr. Jackface's secretary. Originally, when she applied, she was turned down because she was too stupid to even know how to turn on a computer. But, Mr. Jackface took pity on her and showed her the ropes, and she gave him a blowjob to seal the deal. She may look dumb, but that's only because she really is.
	This is our producers, Ronaldo and Rolando. They are in charge of making the music rockin'. They are currently illegal immigrants who get paid $1.23 per hour, but they wouldn't rather be doing anything else in their life. Mr. Jackface takes full advantage of them. He understands how hard illegal immigrants will work for such a low pay.
	This is Barbara, aka "Cold Blooded Killer", head of security here at Jack Face Records. If you get out of line, she'll really rough you up. Talking out of turn, that's a paddling, starring at her sandles, that's a paddling, paddling the company canoe, oh you better believe that's a paddling. I wouldn't want to mess with her, she's a black belt in Tae-Kwon-Do and has successfully decapitated 562 individuals who got in her line of duty.
	This is Miles, the janitor. He is probably the hardest worker employed here at Jack Face Records, that would explain why he has been employee of the month for 57 consecutive months. This guy gets the toliets so spotlessly clean you could eat off them, and he does. He is also a resident here at Jack Face Records, he has a nice tidy bunk in his janitor's closet. You have a mess to clean? He'll be there in an itch of a dick.