Back to the suck for another summer
Now Playing: "Dusty Road" - 4Seen
(Yes, I realize it's been a LONG time since I wrote in this damn thing. But, boredom makes a person do crazy things. So after a lenghty hiatus, I've decided to update and give you a fill on what's new with me and whatnot. Enjoy)

Another summer is upon us people, what a great time of year, except for the fact that I've decided to return to the Valley once again. Why you ask? Money. Plain and simple, just like that. A summer in Boulder would be awesome, but my poor Mexican ass can't afford to make it happen. I weighed the pros and cons, and unfortunately the pros of coming home outweighed the cons. I mean, a guaranteed internship making bank, plus not having to pay for rent or utilies and shit like that... it's a no brainer. Of course, it comes with a price, mainly my social life taking a serious hit. And since I'm not the type to be hanging out high schoolers and classmates that dropped out of college, I can already tell I'm gonna be sittin on my ass quite a bit. But whatever, I survived last summer, I think I'm up to the challenge of round two. But I'll admit, it's a little weird coming back to a small community like here in the Valley when you've been living in Boulder for a year. It usually takes me about a week to adjust. Ask Nate, I'm not bullshittin about this stuff. The people here are completely different. Example:

Things to do at night
Boulder: Go to a party, drink keg beer, play beer pong, blackout and steal liquor store signs then catch the bus unaware that you're carrying a 20 foot Budweiser sign.
The Valley: Cruise Main St. for hours on end seeing if anyone might be throwing a party, drink Skol/Kentucky Deluxe, hang out at Wal-Mart/movie theater.

Things to do during the day:
Boulder: Sleep off last night's ridiculous alcohol consumption and/or pot smoking. Wake up at 4, days are over rated anyway. I thought you knew that.
The Valley: Yell obsenities at the Mormon missionaires. Hang out at Wal-Mart.

Great accomplishments:
Boulder: Going 11-0 at the beer pong table, polishing off the last of that bottle of Jack, and ripping the bong like you're a direct decendant of Cheech Martin all in the same night and not puking.
The Valley: Going to Denver for the weekend.

Cruisin to the radio:
Boulder: Whatever's clever
The Valley: Country or Tex-Mex. Take your pick

Eye candy:
Boulder: Rich white girls from California
The Valley: High schoolers that aren't pregnant. In other words, good luck man, it's slim pickings.

Walking down the street you might be pestered by:
Boulder: Homeless bums, hippies, those annoying "Do you have a minute for the environment?" people.
The Valley: Mormon missionaires

Okay that last one is a draw. But still, now you have a small glimpse into the environment that I'm placing myself in this summer. Not good people. Wish me luck, I'm gonna need all I can get to keep from going clinically insane over the next 2 and a half months.

Salud

Bone Thugs-N-Harmony. Wasteland Warriors
Now Playing: Days of Our Lives - Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
Yeah, I went to a Bone Thugs-N-Harmony concert. It was the best experience of my life to date. I'll just start from the beginning, there's much to tell.

So me and Derek meet up with Raven and Nema and leave for Denver around 6:30. We get to the Odgen and there's hardly anyone in line, which is surprising. I mean the line was longer when we went to see Tech N9ne. Anyway, we wait in line, Derek gets harassed by some crazy homeless guy, you know, the usual routine. So we get into the Odgen and I start to get the chills just because the place brings back memories of Tech's shows. Again, we manage to get up front, like second row.

The first act finally comes on, they were garbage. I don't even know who they were, they didn't even promote themselves, they just sucked. Plus the crowd gave them no love, meh, step ya game up and maybe things would change. That was followed by even more waiting, lame. Then the second act came on, I don't know who he was either but he was a huge scary guy from L.A. I guess he's E-40's cousin, which one though... i have no idea. But he was sick, way better than the last group. He had one single called "Make Noise" or something like that, it sounded like it almost could have been a Tech N9ne track.

Anyway, back to waiting for Bone Thugs to come on. I'm getting antsy and the joint in my pocket sure isn't helping. So they finally come on and by the second beat I have that J sparked and ready to toke. Hey, if you're going to see Bone Thugs that's just something you HAVE to do, it's practically required. Anyway, passing it to Derek was by far the hardest thing I've ever had to do. We're both so excited that we're shaking like an epileptic kid on crack. But had to be the fastest I've ever smoked a joint, I think that thing was done in like 3 seconds flat.

But the concert was amazing. It would have been even better if Bizzy Bone would have been there. Of course, all of 'em are just blasted. I mean Krayzie's just leaning on the DJ booth pouring shots, poppin open bottles of beer, and smoking more pot than Nate on payday... all in between verses. Layzie is going crazy jumping in the crowd and givin love back to the fans (I hugged him by the way, that's not that gay shit either) all while Wish is just being that ruthless thug on stage. It was funny too because when Layzie jumped down into the crowd the security guard was trying to pull him back on stage, Layzie just turned around waved his hand and said, "Fuck no."

They did all of their old shit, alot of songs from East 1999 Eternal. Crossroads, Mo Murda, First of Da Month, East 1999, Ecstacy, Fuck The Police, Thug Love, Blaze It, Wasteland Warriors, Days of Our Lives, Notorious Thugs, Hip Hop Baby, plus some new shit. That's just the tip of the iceberg too.

The best was when they did "Blaze It." The lights went out and was pitch black for the entire song. When they came back on there was so much smoke in the venue you couldn't see the ceiling. Giant hotbox.

Towards the end of the show the cops were trying to get them to stop by flashing their lights at the back to let them know time was up.

DJ Ice: 'ey, tha cops want us to leave. They at the back, they comin for us man.
Krayzie Bone: What??
DJ Ice: yeah, man. We gotta split.
Wish Bone: Fuck that, I'm not ready to leave.
Layzie Bone: Yeah, we just barely getting started man.
Wish Bone: You know what I say? I say FUCK THA POLICE.

That's when they played "Fuck The Police." So sick, I think me and Derek had a vertical that would have made the basketball team jealous. Then they played "Hip Hop Baby." That was a religious experience, I've never been so into a song than at that particular moment.

But sadly, after an amazing set it was finally time for the show to come to an end. I don't think any of us wanted to leave. I think it still had to soak in, Derek and I were still both in shock. But they quickly shuffled us out of the venue. Derek looked like he just got out of the shower, I swear that kid sweats like a gallon of water when he goes to concerts. THAT SHIT IS GROSS.

So we head to the car, stop by Wendy's to grab some food. Now if you've read my previous entries from the Tech N9ne shows I think you might know what's coming.

Guy: Welcome to Wendy's, can I take chu order mane?
Derek: I NEED 10 WATERS, GOT DWAM!!!!
Raven: okay, settle down spaz.
Raven: yeah this is gonna be two seperate orders. On the first one we want "blah blah blah, two large cokes."
Guy: uhhmmm.... ok, I gots, "Two Biggie Cokes, a #3, and a Bacomushroom sanwiche.
Raven: On the second one we want two double stacks w/ cheese, two junior deluxe, and two large cokes.
Guy: uhhh... what? Two ghunior deluxe, uhh... biggie coke?
Derek: GIVE ME MAH FOOD DAMNIT!!! AAAHHHHHHH
Raven: And two double stacks with cheese.
Guy: oh shit, mah bad.

That wasn't even the funny part. So before we left the Odgen Derek wanted to see what merchandise they had for sale. All they had was some hoodies that said "Thug Life" in big script.

Derek: Dude, there's no way I could wear that hoodie. I'd be that kid. The one wearing "Thug Life" everywhere.
John: Hey man, you could say it's tough growing up in the suburbs.
Derek: Yeah man, it was rough as hell. One time, I broke my tricycle, that shit was fucked up. We was true thugs, hell we'd play checkers in tha middle of tha mothafuckin street man. Crazy!
John: got dwam son
Derek: yeah, then when i was 11 I got shot nine times... with a water gun. So rough!
John: Hey there ya go son, that's your gateway into the rap community. "yeah, I got shot 9 times with a water gun, gimme an album. Call it 'Waterproof.'"
Derek: Hell yeah, cuz. I got that new single, it's called "Drippity Drop" featuring Lil Drippy.
John: Yeah, back in tha day they called it Water Balloon Warfare.
Derek: Yup, that WBW was rough. I had to keep my SuperSoaker X-3000P at my side at all times. it was like "clack clack phissssss" I'm already working on my follow up album. It's called "Get Wet or Die Dryin'."
John: that shit's off tha hook.
Derek: Hell ya son. The first single is gonna be sick. It's featuring Aquaman... called "Puddles." Pick that shit up

How in the hell did we get into college???

So we finally get back to Boulder. Me and Derek head over to Caitlin's, but by the time we got there I was too exhausted to even stand. So we bounced, I came back to the house, rolled into my room, fell in my bed and immediatly passed out. That's what a Bone Thugs-N-Harmony concert does to a person, well... plus lots of weed and a giant hotbox for 3 hours. I'd have to say that this concert was by far the best I've ever been to. Way better than Tech, and the Game/Snoop Dogg concert.

"Wasteland soldiers.
These are the days of our lives
I've been strugglin', hustlin', thuggin' it forever.
Come and look deeply in my eyes.
Now come into my world, and you can see that we are more than thugs.
With just a little twist of harmony, we're smokin' lethal warriors."

Salud.

Does anybody still read these?
Well... do ya??

Where we going??? ..."To hell if we don't change our ways"
Now Playing: Loked Out feat. Chingy - DJ Quik
You know, I just cannot keep up with my blog anymore. I guess this year is just packed with so much more shit to do that I never have the time to write. Sad times eh?

Anyway... here's the update... errr, if you wanna call it that.

Well this weekend was about half a success. Friday night was good. Drankin with Dirty D and the 206 clique. Played some flip cup (well, I played with Jack & Coke, yeah I'm smart)... that sent me into that oh so familar land of inebriation. I met a lot of people there, got some phone numbers... shit I'm networking people. So long story short, we decide to head over to the Sigma Nu annex (don't worry it's not the actual frat). Again, I met a lot of people, got some more numbers, drank some beer. Aaron Q. from back home finally showed up, which was weird because he just happened to walk into the same house that we were at. We're there for a while when Aaron asks me to help him find Lesondra (another Valley kin), so we venture outside to begin our search... but it didn't take long because apparently she was standing right outside the house but was either too drunk or blind to see that was the right house. So we're having a good time at the house when Lesondra starts bugging me about leaving. Yeah, she actually wanted to leave this party. Why you might ask??? Because she's a freshman and doesn't know better. No Lesondra, the cops aren't going to bust this place, no the party isn't way too loud, no there aren't too many people here... But she's freaking out because there isn't a backdoor in case the cops really do show up, relax... that's what windows are made for. I guess someone lost sight of their inner Mexican. Tragic.

Finally everyone decides to leave, we head back to my place, drink some mas, fire up the hookah. Some random girls walk up and are facinated by the hookah, so they come up. Once again our house quickly turned into the spot to be. Meh, parties happen. So me and Aaron split to take Lesondra to the bus stop since she lives in Wil Vil. We head back to find Nate is back from work, good times. Him and Nate head off to pick up his car cuz Aaron doesn't want to move it in the morning. But when they get back we're informed that someone broke into his car and stole pretty much everything. Talk about a buzzkill.

That was pretty much the end of Friday... well, to the best of my memory anyway. However, when we woke up in the morning we found a ton of popcorn all over the fuckin apartment. I guess while me and Aaron were gone another group of girls walked in and one of them had a bag of popcorn. This bitch must have been really drunk or had THE worst basic motor skills on the planet because there was popcorn everywhere. The living room, the balcony, the kitchen, even in the fucking bathroom!! I wish I would have been there at the time, I would have punched that whore in the stomach and then threw her off the balcony. I wouldn't have minded so much if we actually had a vacuum to clean it up with, but alas... we are broke.

Saturday... well there's not much to say about saturday. It was pretty much a bust. Meh, whatev. However, I did manage to catch the worst pick up line in the history of man while eating at Abo's. So there was a pretty cute cashier working that night and then this drunk doucher walks in...

Guy: *blank stare* ...uhh, can I get a slice of cheese?
Cashier: yeah, that'll be $2.45.
Guy: uhm.. I'm sorry, what's you're name?
Cashier: Dani
Guy: Dani? cool. yeah... I'm in here all the time
Cashier: Great. WHO'S NEXT?

Denied! The best part was watching the guy's reaction... he looked like a lost kid at K-Mart.

In other news...

My sis came back from her honeymoon in Costa Rica. They came over the other night to visit. They did however bring me back some stuff from Costa Rica (my sister is WAY better than your sister, eat it). A soccer jersey from one of the teams down there (we don't know who though) and a Costa Rican cigar (she wanted to get me a real deal Cuban, but her husband was afraid that customs would find it and ban them from America or something). Still though, legit stuff.

Fall is in the air and I hate it! Fall is by far THE worst season ever invented. I mean, it's getting colder, the days are getting shorter, everything is dying, and you know that winter is now just around the corner. Depressing. But the one thing that keeps me somewhat positive is the fact that it's still way warmer up here than it is in the Valley. Shit, I wouldn't be surprised if they got snow tomorrow.

My beloved Buffs fell victim to the 'Canes. I swear, everytime we play a nationally televised game we choke. Oh well, what can ya do? Except maybe fire Barnett and bench Klatt... but what do I know? You're talking to the guy that has a drinking problem and is addicted to weed (wait, I just described Boulder... nevermind).

This week is gonna suck, lots of homework to do plus a 10 hour calc lab to finish. TERRIBLE

Salud.

Back home for a weekend
Now Playing: Back Up Plan - Chamillionare
Many of you may or may not know that I went home last weekend for my sister's wedding. Good stuff. It was a hella long drive though. I left Boulder around 5 on Friday and didn't get in until 10:30 PM. Wtf. There was a huge back up in between Springs and Castle Rock for like 3 miles, no joke. It took like 40 minutes to finally get going again. When i passed the crash site it looked like someone's truck just blew up, all that was left was a charred shell that resembled a truck. Then once I start getting into the Valley and get off the pass, it starts raining like a bitch. That only delayed me further... so i was pretty pissed off and tired once I finally got it.

Saturday rolls around, not too much happened. Played a round of golf with all the guys, pretty relaxing. Headed back home, got ready, blah blah blah. Hell we cleaned up pretty damn good if I had to say so myself, only downside was having to wear a pink tie since it was what my sis wanted (hey I can't go against the grain on my sister's wedding). The only thing I hate about having to go to a wedding is taking pictures. Everytime you turn around they wanna take a picture! Whatever...

So after all the picture taking and whatnot we make our way to the golf course for the reception. On the way there I've been informed that it's open bar complete with Killian's on tap. Fuckin score! If you know me, you definitely know that I'm gonna be taking advantage of that. Dinner was pretty grub, ribs and grilled chicken, baked beans, salad and all that other nonsense... although I don't think I've ever seen ribs and baked beans at a wedding. Meh, what can i say, my sister is unique.

But the best thing I love about traditional Mexican weddings... La Marcha de los Novios. Its this long, complex march that you do with a partner all around the dancefloor. Not very many people know how to lead it anymore, luckly we had our cuz DJ'ing that night (he knows how to throw shit down). Then, since the groom was Jewish, they did a dance that's traditional for Jewish weddings, I'm sure you've seen it in movies or something like that... anyway, pretty fun too.

So the night progresses, I head to the bar to check up on the game since my beloved Buffs are playing, who were killing the Aggies by the way. Lemme give ya a little info before I proceed. So there are two of the groom's cousins that attended the wedding, both were pretty good looking. I think both were from Isreal, one lives in Denver the other still lives in Isreal. So my brother hit it off with the one living in Isreal, she's pretty good looking... so I'm like good job Dom, get yours. They've been dancing all night and whatnot. So I'm chillin at the bar watching a bit of the game when the one from Denver comes up to me...

Danielle: How come you're not outside dancing?
Me: Because I wanted to check up on the game
Danielle: Oh... well you really need to take Natalie to dance.
Me: uh... why? she's been dancing w/ my brother
Danielle: Yeah, but she finds you extremely good looking.
Me: aahh... What about Dom?
Danielle: What about him?

Okay, now... generally I wouldn't swoop on my bro, its just something I don't do. So I just decide to play it cool... whatever. So I head outside, grab another beer. Natalie heads over, asks to dance... and well, I'm just not gonna go any further with that.

However... here's a fun fact (which I didn't find out until later). I was talking to one of the groom's friends later that night...

Kevin: Hey did you guys know that Natalie is a professional wrestler in Isreal?
Ryan: Huh?? What are you talking about?
Kevin: Yeah! I was talking to her aunt and she said that she's a professional wrestler in Isreal, kinda like the WWE here in America.
Ryan: No fucking way!
Me: You for real?
Kevin: Yeah, she beats bitches up in Isreal for a living!
Ryan: Fuckin sweet

Yup, so I was dealing with a real deal female wrestler. Weird things.

So the night starts to wind down, people start heading home. We and the girls and some of the guys decide to head to their hotel to keep the party going. So we score some more liq, and headed to the room. Good stuff.

And I dunno what it is with me and having these type of encounters, but they keep coming up... Nate can testify. Here's the scenario. Everyone's pretty schwasted (naturally), the girls are lying in the bed, I post up on the side, they then force me to lie in the middle (okay, not like it was against my will, but they literally forced me). Kevin turns over and sees that the scenary has changed...

Kevin: What the fuck! Look at this fucker, fuckin lying in between these two ladies. *stumble* Fuckin game ladies and gentleman. Now...... ...I'm straight as a motherfucker, okay...?? ...yeah... don't get me wrong, ok? But... normally when I... I... come to things like this... I'd say i'm the best looking guy there..... but this kid... this fucker here, was the best looking fucker there.... fuck yeah...
Me: uhhh.... what????
Kevin: fuck yeah! why you think he's the only guy in the fuckin bed and we're all standing like fuckin dumbasses... fuckin game...
Me: yeah... sure, uhh thanks dude.

I was halfway expecting him to bust out with the infamous line, "Damn, you one pretty motherfucker." (See "I actually do things in the Valley for once" if you don't get this joke... dummy).

All in all, it was a good time. I'm glad I went home (well, not like I'd miss my sis' wedding in the first place anyway). The only thing that sucked was having to drive back on Sunday, that sucked bawls. But I won't get into the debacle.

In other news...

School sucks a big one right now, so much homework to do, so little free time. Not only that, but I'm getting sick, which totally sucks nuts if you have class from 8 AM til 5 PM, not a fun thing people.

Salud

Fuck 'em up, fuck 'em up, GO CU!
Now Playing: Celebration - Kanye West
So much to do, so little time to spare. So as many of you know, this weekend was the CU vs. CSU game. Let me tell you something about this game..... I live for this game. This is what I wait 8 odd months for. It could not have come any sooner. So here's the scenario, kick off is set for 1:30 PM on Saturday (dumb, this game SHOULD be a night game), the night before we had been drinking. Actually, I lie, the night before we were PRE-GAMING for a gig that never even existed in the first place. Jaymie leads us over to Moorehead for a party hosted by none other than Andrew Zahn (John-Zahn). So we get there... and uh..... nothing. Its like 6 drunk people just sitting around the couch being idiots. We were all very disappointed to say the least, figures anyway... Moorehead sucks. But I digress... so we stay up 'til 3ish in the morning smoking hookah and whatnot. Now since kick off is so damn early, we all agree on setting the alarms for 8:30 AM. Now what does that tell you about our priorities???? I can barely wake my sober ass up to go to a 10 o'clock class much less do it at 8 AM when I'm drunk. But here in lies the difference... we're not only getting up to go to the game, we're getting up to drink. Yup. We're winners damnit. We start the day off right by downing some Keys, liquid bread people. Nate made a sign for the balcony, "CSU loves the double anal." We received a number of comments on it, both positive and negative, meh, fuck those CSU douchebags. We head to Brad's uncle's tail-gate party around 11ish. Now I've been to this thing with Brad last year, good shit, lemme tell ya whhat. No lack of beer (no no no, not Keystone you idiots, Coors, these people actually graduated and therefore have this thing called "money." look it up), plus they got the grill fired up. I quickly killed a couple Coors (not the regular 12 oz cans, the doubles), aaaaand... i'm drunk. Me and Nate keep and eye on the clock and time is starting to run low, it's 12 o'clock, okay, we're antsy. After several pleas to try and convince Brad that we need to depart, we realized that it was gonna be in vain. I came to this realization after the line, "FUCK, do I need to hold your hand all the way into the stadium???" Ow, my pride. So me, Nate, Jaymie, her friend, Tom & Ben split cuz we want to make sure that we score some choice seats. Good thing we left early cuz we got some bangin' seats right on the 35 yard line. Who's the dummy now, Brad???

It was good to come through those gates and see Folsom Field in all its glory. The green grass was gleaming like a lost gem in sun, the glint off the helmets brought a tear to my eye, and a CSU t-shirt quickly earned the wearer a swift kick to the crotchular area. They finally let Ralphie out of her corral and it hit me like a Mac truck... I'm home. I then proceeded to yell my lungs out.

There's really not much to say about the first half, pretty subpar for the most part. We looked a little rusty out on the field, I will admit that. But what can you expect, it's the first game of the season. So halftime rolls around, Nate leaves for work, sadly, Joe leaves for a halftime party. Jaymie and Shelby then depart soon after play resumes (Jaymie, explain something to me, why pay $50 for a ticket and then leave at halftime... especially when it's the CU vs. CSU game???? This is like the best game of the season we're talking about!) Great, now its just me... all by myself, stuck in a sea of drunk people just when I'm starting to sober up. Brad finally shows up with about towards the end of the third. Now the game really starts to heat up. I don't think I was ever more pumped than when Hugh Charles ran into the endzone with a 1:20 left in the fourth to take the lead. Everyone was my best friend and we were on the top of the fuckin world. CSU quickly answered back, but it would all be in vain after we quickly marched into field goal range (which could have been the Colorado/Wyoming state line considering Crosby's leg). Mason Crosby once again came up big in a clutch situation and nailed it right down the middle from the 40 yard line. With four seconds left it was pretty much in the bag. Hell, we even ended the game with a pick... how you like that Ram Nation??? HOW'S IT TASTE MOTHAFUCKA?!?!?! So we promptly rush the field, I'll admit, I was afraid of the possibility of performing a faceplant while attempting to jump the rails (much like some unfortunate schmuck ahead of me last year). But my adrenaline was pumping, I hurdled that shit and was gone. I did have the priviledge of congratulating Mason Crosby, I think the guy walked out of there with a concussion.

However, quite possibly the most satisfying sight was seeing all the CSU fans walk out with their heads hung low. They looked like a kid that misbehaved and just received a beat down from mom and dad. Not so cocky now huh???

Kalee, Clay, Aaron, anyone else that I know that goes to CSU... face the facts, CU kicks ass. It's scientific. Don't worry though, I won't hold it against ya guys ;)

In other news...

Three day weekends kick ass, especially when it lands on a weekend like this. Perfect timing.

I gotta go back home next weekend for my sister's wedding. Should be a good time, even though it means I have to miss the CU-New Mexico game. Meh, it'll be the same as last year's North Texas game, I'm not worried.

Salud

First week... and i'm already distracted
Now Playing: Hip Hop - Mos Def
Yes... I know, it's been forever since i last updated. Well here ya go beeotches... enjoy.

Ok, where to start. So much to recap... Okay, so the wait was finally over, Friday finally arrived, the day I move in. After much packing, picking up my final paycheck, and hitting up the bank (twice), we were finally on our way. The drive was very long to say the least, I thought we'd never get to Boulder. Get in to Boulder, go to the office, pay the Dude, get my keys, and start unpacking all of my shit. I really didn't think I'd be packing in so much shit. Granted, most of it was stuff for the apartment. Anyway, the night rolls around and we decide to have a "little" get together. Note: little. So we pregame at Derek's a lil, get kinda shitty, get down on some beer pong. Good stuff. There was a good amount of people there, I approved. We head back down to the "Rad Zone" as Nate likes to call it. We sit out on our porch for a lil bit, make fun of freshman, drink beer... and then we see Mandi and the "Vu Crew." So they come up, and her friend Jenifer goes right to work. This bitch knew what was going on, she starts pulling out a frickin wet bar out of her purse. Shot glasses, bottles of various liquours, martini shakers, i was just waiting for her to pull out a thing of those little minature umbrellas. She starts taking shots of white rum and goes from midly buzzed to schwasted in 3.6 seconds flat. Mandee invites a few more friends over, more people show up... and our place went from like 5 people to 20 in 10 minutes. Then Margarite shows up with some friends, Ben and Tom show up too, Derek and Dylan come down, ah fuck lets just invite the whole fuckin street in. So blah blah blah, party is going strong, then i look over and Margarite's friend is passed out on the couch, like stone cold. So we make them get her to the bathroom where she proceeds to puke her guts out. She was in there for a LONG time, she that rotten bitch even broke our towel rack! Okay, so she gets back to the couch, everything is back to normal. PSYCHE! Now Mandee's friend is passed out on the other couch, great. Everyone's freaking out, she keeps yelling that she's fine (actually it was more of a mumble, she was wicked drunk). They get her some water, blah blah blah. Then Tom comes up to me and is like "dude, she puked all over your couch." FUCK! I finally tell Mandee that her friend has to go, out, gone. There's a line, and that bitch drove a fuckin Mac truck over it when she puked on the couch. Long story short, Dom and I finally had to drag her out our door, down the stairs and into the car. This was no easy task folks, I won't go into details because I'm seriously scarred from what happened and I get uneasy just thinking about it. What a way to kick off the first night back in Boulder eh???

Cut to Day 2. We pick up five 30 racks of 'Stones, and then cirlced the block for like 30 minutes trying to find a damn place to park. Brad comes back with some P-Town girls... and its pretty much just us and Jaymie for a while. Then people start showing up out the ass. Most of which I didn't know, meh. It got bumpin' in no time. It was like twice as packed compared to the first night. The beer went really fast, Probably would have been a better idea to get a keg (hint hint, nate). Everything was gellin great, except for this really tall and creepy kid that no one seemed to know. Derek claimed that the kid was trying to hit on him, wierd. Meet a lot of people that night..... and then forgot their names 4.2 seconds later. However, mad props to Joe for taking care of that creepy kid, that was clutch.

Joe (to me): Hey.... uhhhhh....... we're gonna head out, so.... uhmmmm...... i'll see ya later. Oh, and I'll take care of that creepy guy.
Joe (shouting): OKAY, WELL SEE YA LATER JOHN, THANKS FOR HAVING US, GREAT PARTY....
*turns to kid* Alright, you ready to go man?
Kid: Uhhhhhh.... huh?
Joe: Alright, great! Lets split man!!!
Kid (to me): uhhh... i don't even know this guy.
Me: Sweet! Well thanks for stopping by, you guys be safe!

Right about there is where I pushed 'em out the door and then slammed it. All in all, a kick ass night for a kick ass spot. If you didn't stop by, you should have, you missed out dummy... now go sit in the corner and think about what you've done.

In other news...

Although it kicks ass, our apartment is still pretty bare. Mostly in part to lack of funds. Don't worry, that should all be straightened out soon. We STILL don't have a TV (wtf Rael??), so if any of you have an extra boob-tube on your hands, please take pity on our TV deprived souls and make a contributions. Don't worry, you can write it off as a charitable donation on your taxes, plus we'll let you watch ON DEMAND.

I hate going to the bookstore, everytime I enter that place my wallet shudders. Plus, I'm convinced that everyone at the campus bookstore is either a) on a power trip, b) pissed off, c)a big bag of douche, or d) all of the above. Seriously folks, if you're 30 and still working at the campus bookstore thats not our fault... that's your fault for being such an ignorant asshole. Plus that place always rips you off in one way or another.

Send food.... or beer.... actually, send anything so long as it's free.

Sauld.

T9X
Now Playing: What's Your Purpose - Potluck
okay folks, here we go... this is the T9X, please return your seats to their upright position and hold on to your butts.

Roll into Boulder around 4:30 Thursday, stopped by Dylan's place to see my degenerate Valley kin, Nate. Since he's now officially homeless he's taken refuge in Dylan's place. We did a whole lot of nothing, dropped off his girlfriend's car (which was really nice btw, I felt like stealing it). We get back to Dylan's, the whole crew was there. Saw Jaymie for like, .2 seconds. It was good to be back in boulder and see everyone again, nostaglic. anyyyyway... So we all cram into Derek's friend's car (which was really hard considering Derek's brother is the size of Rhode Island) and roll over to Kaitlin's pad. They're place is fuckin bomb, how in the hell are they paying less than us??? I'm declaring bullshit. Long story short, we find some Admiral Nelson's and make some makeshift Faderade. It got the job done.... and then everyone sucked for about half an hour. And by everyone I mean me, Derek, and Nate. We eventually make in into someone's Jeep and make our way to Denver. It was here that I came to the conclusion that Derek and I are two of the least functional people on the face of the earth (excluding Nate of course).

Derek: I'm so stoked
John: I'm drunk
Derek: What???
John: meh
Derek: HAAAAAAAAAHN????
John: Huunh?
Derek: What?
John: Yea.
Derek: Some people say cucumbers taste better pickled.
John: Huunh?
Nate (from the trunk): You don't own the universe! So quit acting like you do!
Derek: here, drink this nigga (hands over a flask)
John: Huunh? What is it?
Kaitlin: It's Apple McCormicks
John: *dry heave*
Nate: *dies*

Yeah we all suck a lot, meh. A-block.... bitch. Get to the Odgen, park, yada yada yada, more on that fiasco later. So we finally get inside and there's hardly anyone there, which is fortunate for us cuz we were able to get all the up to the front, like on the rail practically. Wait, yada yada, whatever. The show finally starts, Cool Nutz opens up. I'm not sure if I liked his performance or not, I was kinda on the fence on that one. And who really titles they're album "I Hate Cool Nutz" anyway???? Gay.

Potluck comes out next. To tell the truth I was skeptical that they would be any good, but to my surprise they actually did a damn good show. All I have to say is that little white guy can rap. Got Dwam! Ooh, and... they threw out free blunt wraps, I snagged like 5 of those things. Score! I'm gonna be really REALLY high when i use 'em. So while we were waiting for the next act to come out the guys in front of us sparked up a blunt. Now these guys were rolling they're faces off and were making little to no sense. But before the show they would not stop talking about this blunt that they had. So we're like cool, whatever. I manage to bum a few hits, something that I would later regret. These guys were talkign about how they never smoke schwag and they only roll chronic blah blah blah blah blah... if you only knew how many times I heard that before. Them fools was full of shit, they gave me some bad reefer man. It even made me sick, I felt like i was gonna black out, and the worst part of all... it didn't even get me high. I finally realize that I need to get some air ASAP or I'm gonna pass out before Tech comes out. So I'm making my way to the back when the lights dim and I hear "Tech tech tech tech tech...." PSYCHE! I make a complete 180 and return to my kick ass spot, fuck air, there's tons of air outside but there's only one Tech inside. Tech came out and I instantly forgot about being sick, fuck that I needa see Tech damnit. Long story short, kick ass show. In fact, if it would have kicked anymore ass there would have been a negative amount of ass in the world. An anti-ass if you would. Tech was his usual self. Weird. I think I saw Derek shrink before my eyes, that foo sweats so damn much. Nate and I touched Tech N9ne, I'm never washing this hand again.... well, minus the shower I just took of course.

The show ends, sadly. We get outside and get to the parking lot when some guys comes up and informs us that if we're looking for our car that we're out of luck cuz all of the cars in the lot got towed. WTF? Apparently that wasn't a public parking lot so they towed like 15 cars out of that piece. So we're like, where's the fuckin sign??? And where is it??? Neatly tucked in the back corner of the lot posted up on the back wall of the building. Nicely played you towing bastards. Okay... so just call the number, find out what we gotta do to get the car back, and head our merry way home right??? Nah, that would make John's life to easy. We get the answering machine which informs us that they only take calls from 9 to 5. How in the hell??? What kind of fucking company only takes calls from 9 to 5 but tows cars at 11 PM???? These guys really chaffed my ass. So we camp out at the local 7-11, buy like 15 gallons of water between 7 of us and are forced to sit there and feel like the scum of the earth.

Derek: this is so fucking gay. *drinks from jug of water* mmm.... water.
Nate: word doggy, now hand over that water. I'm really poor
Derek's brother (Grant): Well atleast we get to sit down for a while *sits on the hood of Kaitlin's friend's jeep* mmmm... Hyundai.
John: huunh?
Derek: Cucumbers.
Nate: ssssshhhh, shut up. That homeless couple is fighting over a cigarette.
Lauren: that's sad
Nate: nah I'm actually kind of enjoying it.

So after some phone calls we finally round up enough cars to make a trip to Boulder. Get back to Dylon's, do nothing for a while. Try (note the word "try," it's key) to grill up some hot dogs. Actually, they're were TOO bad. But after eating them the general consensence was that we all felt really weird. I think those 'dogs were laced with something. Meh. We attempted to do things, but failed miserably and ending up watching Dylan and his old roommate play foosball at they're new pad.

All in all, it was a very successful trip. The Vintage didn't act up on me at all. Actually she ran pretty damn good, she deserves a snack. It was good to be in Boulder again, sans the rain part. Saw Jaymie, even though it was for like .2 seconds. 117 returned to all it's retarded glory once again, Derek and I really should do something about "getting a life,"... pfft, whatever that means. The Tech N9ne show was SIIICK. That towing company is really shady, once I make it back to Boulder I'm gonna have Brad call 'em up and berate the fuck out of 'em (take that bitches). Nate is really poor, but God bless him in all his homelessness. Two more weeks.

In other news...

I only have 5 more days of work left, my last day is this coming Saturday. So it basically boils down to me riding the palette jack around the backroom all day since it's my last week. What are they gonna do??? Take it away?? Wait, thats bad. I like riding that thing around.

Salud.

Some people say cucumbers taste better pickled
Now Playing: Be Warned - Tech N9ne
K, lots to update on... where to begin?

So the other day we decided to go fisihing. We went back to Summitville, I love that place, its so fuckin sick. Anyway, we took my cuz, he was pretty impressed. It was a damn good day for fishing lemme tell you what, we didn't see a single person all day, no clouds, very sunny but not hot. And since hardly anyone goes all the way up to Summitville the place is just teeming with fish. But they're just brookies, very small. You gotta sneak up on those fuckers and then drop your line, if they see you they swim away in a flash. Anyway, we walked out of there with 17 fish, very productive day.

Work is getting gayer by the minute. I had to miss Stampede, very gay. Everyone went to the carnival today, and it sucks cuz Stampede is the only time a DECENT carnival comes to town. Oh, and about a week and a half ago i asked my manager for the 4th - 6th of August off, no problem. So yesterday I go to look at the new schedule and he only gave me Tuesday and Thursday off. WTF? So I say fuck that weak shit, I'm callin in sick on Friday.

Tech N9ne is right around the corner, couldn't be more excited. Then its only two more weeks until I move into the apartment. ILL! I have a feeling someone is fall off the balcony while intoxicated. Most likely Nate or Derek. Word has it Vegas is giving Nate 3 to 1 odds, place your bets now.

I think I set a new pallete jack landspeed record today while at work. I decided to ride one around the backroom like a skateboard today after everyone left simply because I was bored and didn't feel like working. Are we starting to see a recurring theme anywhere??

Salud

I actually do things in the Valley for once
Now Playing: Thug Mentality - Bone Thugs-N-Harmony
So much went down this weekend (well, for me anyway), lets see... where to start.

Friday kinda turned out to be a bust. After getting off work I picked up Nate, we split to Manassa to see what was going down at Mormon Christmas (Pioneer Days as they like to call it). Just the standard carnival as usual, I got bored in record time, if I had not been smoking a cigar I wouldn't have known what to do with myself. It was then that I remembered why I haven't gone to Pioneer Days in like 5 years.... it sucks. Long story short, we saw a bunch of people that we didn't feel like running into and felt like punching many of them in the face. It's amazing how many people that I went to high school went have gotten fat, had a kid, and/or got married. It boggles the mind. Also, Nate and I came to the conclusion that we should have been born like 4 years later... there are alot of 15 year olds running around that look like they're 18, it's scary. So after a lot of walking around and asking around if anyone was gonna do anything it was apparant that the night was going nowhere fast. Everyone wasn't doing anything, and no one knew of anything going down (gay). So we decided to bounce back to La Jara and stop by Mitch's place. There were a couple people there that we knew from H.S. We pretty much just bullshitted all night and talked about how everyone got fat and pregnant. That's what happens here in the Valley folks, people go to school, drop out or resort to transfering to Adams State, get their girlfriends pregnant, have kids, and then end up working at McDonalds. That's why I went to Boulder. So instead of ending with a bang, Friday night went out with a fizzle. Again, gay.

Cut to Saturday night. Meet up with Nate at the carnival, more walking around and talking to people that we didn't really feel like talking to. We did however run into a few people that don't suck. It was good to catch up and whatnot. Anyway, Nate and I then get this brilliant idea to score some chronic. So we find our old classmate Adam (note: Adam was the only black kid in our class and the only one in the entire school since his brother Tony graduated). We find him talking to some people so we roll up casually. I just happened to be standing next to a big Hispanic guy that looked a little to GQ to be in the Valley. Peep this:

Guy: oh shit, who's this pretty boy??? Damn, you one pretty motherfucker
Me: uhhh.... yeah... i guess
Guy: yeah you pretty

I was pretty weirded out to say the least, I'm pretty sure that fool was blasted, atleast he better have been. Anyway... Adam's down like a clown, one of the coolest but grimiest idividuals ever to come out of the Valley. It doesn't take him long to score us some chronic, Nate and John are now giddy as school girls. So we cut to Adam's place, blah blah blah... we're stoned (keep in mind that I haven't smoked since I left Boulder). So we're just chillin and whatnot and out of nowhere we hear Adam's brother Tony outside yellin' at us. Now Tony just isn't any regular guy, oh no. Tony is probably the greatest athlete to ever attend Centauri High School. He made it to the NFL for crying out loud! He's one BIG motherfucker, what else would you expect of a defensive end? I think everyone in the Valley is afraid of Tony, Nate especially. here's how it went down:

Tony (from outside the window): WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN THERE?!?!?!?!?!?
(at this point everyone looks like a deer stuck in the headlights of an oncoming Mack truck)
Nate: oh shit, is that Tony??? Oh fuck! Fuck, I'm dead. He hates me, he's gonna kill me! Hide this shit, quick quick quick
Adam: Nigga chill, he don't hate you
Nate (scrambling to hide the weed): yeah he does, holy shit he's gonna kill us
Tony: haha, I'm just fuckin with ya. But my daughter is coming in
John: Do we need to like.... uhh... do things now???

I think my heart skipped a beat. But then again, we were high as fuck. People started to pour into the place in no time, we had a party on our hand people. I did a lot of mingling, well... as much as I could considering the condition I was in. That same guy that we ran into while talking to Adam showed up. He tried starting a fight with his cousin while outside apparently. It was then that I started to put two and two together. Here's this guy in the Valley, wearing a pink button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up, khaki Dockers, Doc Martins, and thick framed white sunglasses... he's calling everyone a faggot and saying that they're gay, he tried to get Adam to show him his dick because he was convinced that he had it pierced.... that nigga was gay! But I was WAY to high to take that in so I returned inside. We didn't do much after that. More of the same. Adam told us about some shit that he did while he was in Denver, it blew both of our minds away. I think we pretty much smoked up everyone there, meh... we're generious people. We then decided to head on home and that was it for Saturday night.

In other news...

My cousin from Mexico is spending two weeks with us. He decided to buy a PSP yesterday. I'm now very jealous. Also, I wish my Spanish was better. I remember being somewhat fluent when he spent a year with us like 5 years ago, but now I'm having such a hard time getting my point across.

Tech N9ne is approaching rapidly and I'm very stoked. I still need to buy my tickets though, remind me to do that please, I'm very lazy and forgetful.

Only 20-some days until school starts, fuck yeah doggy. Can't wait to move in and start blacking out. sscchhllll.......

Salud

Boredom sucks
Now Playing: Summer Nights - Lil Rob
Just thought I'd share this with everyone. Hey it made me laugh:

I used to hate it when the guys I dated drank without me because I didn't know what trust was before [John], even though he puked on Halloween and passed out in my bathroom..while wearing aviators (that's classy, ladies!).

I completely forgot about the whole Halloween debacle. I have no idea where I got aviators from, too bad I didn't keep 'em... I'd have a sweet pair of glasses if I had. meh, I was obviously very drunk.

And whoever thought that boredom could turn out to be so entertaining??? After having a discussion with Brad over messenger that the Orange Fantana looked like a man, I took it upon myself to do a little editing to fix the situation...



After that, boredom took over...




Yes, I know... I have far too much free time on my hands.

In other news...

Pioneer Days AKA Mormon Christmas is this weekend. It's pretty much just an excuse to party. Nate should be down, good stuff. Too bad I have to work, major buzzkill. Anyway, it should still be a good time, stoges shall be smoked, beer shall be consumed, and laws will most likely be broken. Go us.

Salud

watch the way i navigate
Now Playing: Feel Good Inc - Gorillaz
So I've recently decided that I hate my shift. Not the job, just the damn shift. 12 - 9 PM. It sucks balls. I mean, its pretty much my whole day. I usually sleep until i have to go to work, then by the time i get off I'm so tired that I don't feel like doing anything. I mean I've been passing out around 10-11! WTF.

Only four more weeks until school starts. Isn't it weird that before we were counting down until summer, now it seems like everyone is counting down to school. I myself think its a bit odd. But for me, school has become my oasis. A time when I can escape this living hell called "home." I can do my own thing and no one can give me shit about it, that's what I like the most about being away from home. I really wish that I would have stayed in Boulder this summer. I could have accomplished SO much more up there. meh. I guess I learned my lesson, being home sucks balls.

I watched Van Wilder last night, and even though I've seen that movie a million times, I was inspired. Not so much to spend 7 years in college, but rather to savor and appreciate the four (probably five) years that I will spend there. A year has already passed in what seemed like a flash. I don't want to have any regrets, which is why I've decided to live next year to the fullest (translation: never ending inebriation). College isn't just about earning a degree, its also about making lasting friendships and great memories... and then trying to remember them the next morning.

Salud

Who DOESN'T like sombreros????
Now Playing: Trying to Get at You - 8 Ball & MJG
I would update this and write about some exciting escapade that I had the other day or about how I got really wasted last night and passed out in a ditch, but sadly... nothing of that sort has happened lately. My life seems to have been put on cruise control. Nothing new, nothing exciting, nothing worth writing about that's for damn sure. What ever happened to summer being the "fun" part of the year??? I haven't done anything fun (minus camping and the Boulder trip, but that's only two things). All I've done is work. Work workiddy workwork. And for what??? Just to pay my fuckin rent come fall (which is ridiciously high, no thanks to Joe). I could live with it if I got to blow it on drugs or alcohol once in a while, but I can't even do that cuz I'm stuck in this fucking black hole of fun. And its not like I can go anywhere because my car is a piece of shit and I'm afraid it's gonna break down on me plus I work all the time which makes it hard to get time off. To quote Brad, "Work is dumb." There, I said it. I think it's safe to say that I've had the worst summer out of anyone I know, and if you think you got me beat then just try me.

Okay, enough of that bitchfest...

In other news...






k, I honestly had to stop and think if there's any other news, for like a good 3 minutes. I've come to the conclusion that there is no "other news."

Salud bitches

Happy B-Day America, lets get crunk
Now Playing: Heaven - Nas
So as noted in my previous entry, I had the 4th of July off. It was good to have the holiday off, I've been working my ass of lately. Anyway... I relayed the idea of making a trip up to Summitville to my dad since it was his old sheepherding range. Of course he jumped at the idea (he's been talking about going back there for years now). But, being the stickler that he is for going places on time, he got very upset when me and my brother weren't ready to go by 9 AM. So after some arguing and yelling and the usual family tension, he, my brother, and I were off. It was a pretty enjoyable ride actually. It's always fun to hear my dad talk about life on the trail (even though I've heard all his stories a million times since I can remember). It took a good two hours to finally get to Summitville, but it was worth it. Lemme tell ya folks, this place is absolutely beautiful. Just think of all the ghost towns that you've seen in movies or on TV... Summitville fits the description perfectly. Rustic and weatherbeaten buildings, deserted roads, and that one creepy building that sits on a ridge. Just a lil history for ya (cuz I'm cool like that):
-Summitville is often noted as one of the biggest mining boomtowns in the state of Colorado. In its hayday, the town reached a population of over 3,000. Outfitted with two hotels, nine mills, 14 saloons, a postoffice, and a schoolhouse this town was on its way to becoming quite the buzzing city.
-The Summitville mines pulled out the most gold in the state of Colorado. In fact, the largest gold nugget came out of the Summitville mine (I would ask my dad how big it was but he went to bed, loser).

That's just the tip of the iceburg, talk to my dad if you want to find out more. Seriously, he can go on and on and on and on about this place, you think he ran for mayor. Anyway, it's pretty tragic what has happened there. During the 1980s the site was reopened and open pit mining began there. Long story short, it was ran by some dumbass from Canada (blame Canada) who didn't take the proper precations and basically ruined the place. The chemicals that were used to separate the gold from the ore seeped into the ground and contaminated the surrouding streamwater which in turn contaminated the Alamosa River (which runs RIGHT behind my house) and killed off all aquatic life. Seeing that things were going south, the idiot fled back to his wretched homeland and left everything a mess. Today only half of South Mountain remains and there is now an ugly water treatment plant at the base of the mountain. It sucks. But other than that the place is pretty sweet, and it's so high up that hardly anyone knows about it. We did some exploring, my dad showed us where they would run the sheep. He said that during the summer they would have the whole side of the mountain to themselves, he said that they would use some of the old houses in town to store their supplies, it's pretty cool to think that they would have all that land to themselves. But then again I guess you'd need a lot of range for over 2,500 head of sheep.

Later in the day we did a little fisihing (well just my brother cuz he was the only one that brought his pole). My dad showed us this secluded beaver pond that he used to fish back in the day when he used to ride the trail, it took a good trek to get there since it was way off the road. Too bad we didn't have the right tack and worms or else we would have walked out of there with a buttload of fish. We're in the process of planning another expedition up to Summitville, my dad is all for riding the old trail on horses and packing our way up there. But if we were to do that it would take a good four days to get there, and I don't think I'd be able to get that much time off. But it'd still be hella fun to do. However, this next time we're just gonna have to settle for driving up there as usual.

So we finally get back home after a long drive. Me and my brother were gonna drive to New Mexico to buy some fireworks, but unfortunately we got home too late so we had to cancel. We were both pretty bummed cuz we really wanted to buy some Black Cats, bottle rockets, and mortars. I still think it's gay that you can only buy fountians in Colorado, it really ruins 4th of July. I mean, what's Fouth of July without high explosive fireworks and screeching bottlerockets???

The night ended with going to the fireworks display put on by the city of Alamosa. We went with my brother's family, the kids were pretty stoked. All in all it was a pretty enjoyable Fourth. I mean, as fun as it can be sans alcohol or weed.

In other news...

I've already started my new position at work. It's going pretty good so far. You gotta bust your ass all day and it's nonstop work, but time goes fast. Plus I'm getting $2 more to do it. I'll take everything I can get.
Salud.

C'mon and ride with me one time
Now Playing: Got Plans - Kutt Calhoun
So I recently got a promotion at work. Fuck yeah doggy that's some good cake. I'll now be moving to the Grocery department where I'll be working as a stocker. I think I'll be making close to $9/hour, but I'm not sure cuz they haven't told me the exact rate. Either way its still a helluva lot better than $6.50/hr. Of course, this new posistion also means that I'll be busting my ass nonstop. I have to unload and stock 65 cases in an hour, that's a big quota to fill. I think the last guy was only able to do 25 cases an hour, but then again he was slow as fuck and I think mildly retarded. Besides, I figure if I can buck 780 bales of hay within a day (loading it on the trailer and then unloading it into the barn) I'm sure I can handle 65 cases/hr.

Also, this means that if I want to transfer to King Soopers up in Boulder I'll have some experience at something other than carryout. I'm sure they pay more up there too.

Oh... AND I got nominated for employee of the month. Hopefully that carries a raise with it. That'd be tits. I told one of my managers that part of being employee of the month was hooking me up with her super hot daughter. She laughed and then said "Okay." I'm still trying to figure out if she was being serious or not.

In other news...

Tech N9ne, August 4th, get retarded... to the dome piece. However, I'm still trying to figure out how to work this out. I have a family reunion August 5-7. I'm pretty sure I could ask for the 4th though the 6th off, but as far as making it back in time is a little trickier. This is quite the dilemma. I dunno what I'm gonna do.

Management gave me the 4th of July off, they must like me or something. Anyway... its still gonna be pretty boring, I have no plans what so ever. I suck. I don't think we're even gonna drive down to New Mexico to buy illegal fireworks, how depressing huh? that was like the highlight of the summer growing up.

Salud