REAL NAME: Unknown
OCCUPATION: Aluminum shaper, Wood Cutter
PLACE OF BIRTH: South Bay, Aquabania
KNOWN RELATIVES: Unknown
GROUP AFFILIATION: The Aquabats, Dig Bun AE, The Blue Whales, The Goodwin Cycle Club
HEIGHT: 5'9"
WEIGHT: 75
EYES: Blue and Green sometimes
HAIR: Brown-Green
STRENGTH LEVEL: Pretty much down there
KNOWN SUPER HUMAN POWERS: Good aim, razor sharp action chop!
WEAPONS: Exploding Guitar, Numbchucks
TURN ONS: Raja dance music
TURN OFFS: Band Practice

It just so happened, Chainsaw Karate was born to a humble family of woodcutting martial artists deep in the hills of the Southbay. He was born in a lodge made of sticks and moss and with one sigh of relief, he was born. And so it was. Chainsaw was born...one day.

From the early stages of he game, it was apparent that Chainsaw had juice. That's right, homeboy. Juice. In his small hamlet of wood-chopping martial artists he soon became known as the child prodigy, Woodchop Master. He was only five months old.

One day in a fit of rage, Chainsaw sold his family heirloom toboggan (widely used by wood-chopping artists for such useful tasks as transporting logs and sliding down snow-covered hills in the winter time.), and was thrown out of the lodge by his father,Jerry,who was very upset.

Now homeless, friendless and beardless, Chainsaw made his way down to the local country fair and jamboree where he planned to spend some of the $73.48 he'd acquired from the sale of the family heirloom toboggan. First he bought a ticket for the pancake batter chug-a-lug to be a contestant. The ticket was $10.00,and the contest started at 4:00am the following day. Then he bought a trick dog leash with an invisible dog on the end for $7.99. After that he bought some indian jewelery, a turquoise buffalo chip for $34.95. Chainsaw then entered a hair farmers contest and the entrance fee was $9.99. With the average tax rate at 6.34%, how much did Chainsaw have left before winning the Pancake Batter Chug-a-Lug?

Well, that doesn't really matter, because just then, Chainsaw heard something that changed his life forever. There in the pavillion, he saw his future. A band called The South Bay Surfers were playing "Wooley Bully" with such . . . comittment, with such. . . majesty, that our young woodchopper knew he wanted to make rock'n'roll guitars, and play them for his new heroes, The Aquabats!

The End.