E-mail: brainysmurf16@hotmail.com
Summary: Willow's been having naughty, naughty dreams about our favorite lovable doof, and finds it hard to deal
Rating: PGish for this part
Feedback: NOW! (A vauge discalmer is no one's friend!
Notes: Thoughts are in ( )'s, Not EVEN BETA-ed!
Distribution: If you have others, take it, i just like to know where they are, bc it gives me a power rush to see them on sites!
How do you cool you lips, after a summer's kiss?
How do you rid the sweat, after the body's bliss?
*Again. You think I would have learned by now. How long have I been in love with him? Forever. What has it brought me? Nothing but pain, that's what!*
Willow Rosenburg stared across the table at her best friend. And the man she was in love with. She watched him kiss his girlfriend, and hold her hand, and look into her eyes. She watched and wished it was her. It wasn't that she begrudged him his happiness, it was just that she really wanted that happiness to be with her. No matter how much she tried to deny, her feelings for Xander always made themselves blatently clear. Like lately, she would wake up in Tara's arms with Xander's face on her mind. Her body still tingling from the dreams she had.
For over a month now, she had been plaugued with the same dream. They were outside, running through a meadow. He caught up to her and wrapped his arms around her, dragging her into the tall grass that surrounded them. He would kiss her and hold her, and do wonderful things that made her wake up flushed and sweating. Every morning she woke up with love in her eyes. And lately with digust in her heart. Tara looked at her and thought the look was hers. She had no idea. Willow felt horrible.
How do you turn your eyes, from the romantic glare?
How do you block the sound of a voice, you'd know anywhere?
The worst thing was she couldn't escape it. She couldn't exactly avoid him, now could she? Every night, it was either saving the world or hanging at the bronze. They still laughed at their inside jokes, and puzzeled the others with their memories. She still loved him. How could she not? The worse thing was that lately, she had been entertaining the horrible thought that he knew. She would look over to catch him staring at her. She knew it must be glaring obvious to him how she felt. How could it not be? She stiffened and pulled away everytime he touched her. Jumped when he talked to her. She was head over heels. With a sigh she realized that everyone was getting up.
"Are you coming?" Tara asked.
"Oh, uhh, in a few minutes. I want to her the end of this set."
"Ok, I'll see you when you get home."
"XANDER! HURRY UP!" Anyas shrill command cut over the music pounding from the club's speakers.
"I think I'm gonna stay, honey, I want to hear the band."
"Ok, fine. I'll just go home and do non-Xander things. LIKE NOT HAVING SEX WITH YOU!"
As half the club turned and stared at the display, Xander turned bright red and bid Anya goodbye.
Oh, I really should have known
By the time I drove you home
By the vagueness in your eyes, your casual good-byes
By the chill in your embrace
The expression on your face, told me
Maybe, you might have some advice to give
On how to be insensitive, insensitive, ooh, insensitive.
"Night, Wills." Xander told her as he pulled up in front of Willows dorm. "You want me to walk you up?"
"NO! I mean, uh, you've done so much already! I mean, you drove me home and everything."
"C'mon, Willow, I'll walk you up."
"Thanks."
The pair walked along the sidewalk leading up to Willow's dorm. Feeling the obvious tension radiating from Willow's body, Xander gripped her hand and pulled her off the sidewalk.
"Uhhh, whatcha doin?"
"We're taking a walk."
"Weren't we doing that?"
"Yeah, but now we're doing it for longer. So, out with it. What's wrong? Having some Tara problems? Cuz, ya know, I'm always here as a mediator. Maybe you could work it out through a nice mud wrestle. Oh, yeah, wonderful, problem solving mud!"
"Xander?"
"Went too far with the mud there, didn't I?"
"Yeah, just a little."
"Sorry. But really, what's up. You've been all pensive for the last few weeeks. A pensive Willow is no one's friend."
"Sure she is! She's friend to the pensive people!"
"Wills?"
"Uggh! God, Xander how can you NOT know!" Even as the words were escaping her mouth, she wanted to take them back. Nothing good could come of this! "You just sit there with your stupid girlfriend and your stupid Willow-free life!" A bit shocked at herself, Willow turned her gaze from his. As bad as this would make her feel later, it felt good to get it out. Like a burden was being lifted off of her chest. "You're my best friend! And I love you! And you don't love me! You love Anya and her stupid, stupid 'I'm a demon, I'm so tactless, look at me' antics!" Willow let a deep breath and thought about what she had just done. *Oh no, oh no, oh no, time turning back now, words going back into mouth! Oh, thats never gonna happen! Oh no, Oh no, Oh no!* "You're so insensitive!" She cried, running off.
A stunned Xander stood under a large oak tree watching formerly pensive newly angry Willow run to her dorm. "That was unexpected," he mused outloud.
To be continued...