You have entered the comedian's column...there aren't
any comedians here at the moment-they have all
slacked off, but have a drink (non alcoholic if
you're under 18!) sit back and laugh yourself
silly!
Guys don't take this personally, and girls,
heheh we know it's the truth.
"The patient's family gathered to hear what the
specialists had to say." Things don't look good.
The only chance is a brain transplant. This is
an experimental procedure. It might work, but the
bad news is that brains are very expensive, and
you will have to pay the costs yourselves."
"Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the
relatives. "For a male brain, $500,000. For
a female brain, $200,000." Some of the younger
male relatives tried to look shocked,
but all the men nodded in understanding,
and a few actually smirked. Then the patient's
daughter asked, "Why the difference in price
between male brains and female brains?"
"A standard pricing practice," said the head of
the team..... "Women's brains have to be marked
down because they are used."
Another joke of that calibre.... Three men found
a genie's lamp and rubbed it. The genie pops up
and grants them all one wish. The 1st man wanted
to be 25% smarter, his wish was granted, he
was happy. The 2nd man saw the first man so
happy, so he wanted to be 50% smarter. His wish was
granted so he was even more happy. The
3rd man saw the other two men happy, so he wanted
to be 100% smarter. His wish was granted
and he turned into a woman!
What is the quickest way to a mans heart?
With a sharp knife through his chest! heheheh...sorry.
Why did the elephant paint his balls red?
Because he wanted to camouflage into a cherry tree.
What is the loudest noise in the Jungle?
A giraffe eating cherries....heheh doesn't that just put you off cherries altogether?
Okay last one....
Two nuns, Sister Marilyn and Sister Helen, are traveling through Europe in their car. They get to Transylvania and are stopped at a traffic light.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, a diminutive Dracula jumps onto the hood of the car and hisses through the windshield.
"Quick, quick!" shouts Sister Marilyn. "What shall we do?"
"Turn the windshield wipers on. That will get rid of the abomination," says Sister Helen.
Sister Marilyn switches them on, knocking Dracula about, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns.
"What shall I do now?" she shouts.
"Switch on the windshield washer. I filled it up with Holy Water in the Vatican," says Sister Helen.
Sister Marilyn turns on the windshield washer. Dracula screams as the water burns his skin, but he clings on and continues hissing at the nuns.
"Now what?" shouts Sister Marilyn.
"Show him your cross," says Sister Helen.
"Now you're talking," says Sister Marilyn as she opens the window and shouts, "Get the F*%K off our car!"
hehehe, that was a cute one wasn't it?! :)
