I can still remember the pain I felt as I drove home, the sad, sickening pain. Twice I had to pull over to the side of the road because my tears were so thick that I couldn't see. Then, when I got home, I laid in my room and sobbed for hours. The only man I had ever loved was gone, away on a tour and who knew if he would come back.
It had been two weeks since he left when I flipped on the TV and saw the Backstreet boys in concert. I sat down on the couch and listened to Nick Carter sing, images of our short time together in my mind. Our last kiss before he boarded the plane.
They started singing 'Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely' and tears rolled down my cheeks. As he said his lines, my heart nearly burst with the longing and desire I felt for him.
After the song, Nick looked at the camera and winked. I imagined that he was winking at me and the tears slowed slowly. I stood, flipped off the TV, and walked into the kitchen. Feeling sick at heart for waiting so long to tell Nick that I love him. Then I wished that we had had more time to get to know each other, fall deeper in love. I could still feel the taste of his lips rocking over mine, our tongues dancing to a secret, silent dance.
Deciding that I was no longer hungry, I turned and walked onto the patio. The sun was going down and I wondered where Nick was and what he was doing at that exact moment. I wondered if he was thinking of me or if he was courting another girl.
My phone ringing brought me out of my thoughts. I walked inside and picked up the receiver, "Hello?"
"I love you." Nick's familiar voice said into the phone.
I smiled, "I love you, too, Nick."
Nick laughed softly, "Did you see the concert, I winked at you."
My heart did a flip flop and tripped over itself at his words. Right at that moment all I wanted to do was pull him into my arms and kiss him passionately. To sooth the desire that was burning in me like a forest fire. His warm, love filled voice sounded sincere and my heart melted as I imagined his gorgeous blue eyes under his blond hair.
"I figured that. Did you guys have fun?"
Nick laughed softly, "I knew you would. It would be a lot more fun if you were here. I love you so much, I just wish I could take you into my arms and kiss you and kiss you and kiss you and kiss you…"
I laughed, "That's a lot of kissing, Mr. Carter."
"I know." I could almost see the mischievous glimmer in his eyes. "Sounds fun."
I giggled, "You know, you're right. When you get back, we'll have to try that."
Nick sighed, "I wish the tour were over right now!" in the background I heard AJ scream.
"Nick!!!!"
Nick howled with laughter, "AJ found my little present, I see."
I laughed, "What did you do, Nick?"
Nick chuckled, "Nothing! I swear!"
I just laughed again as a door slammed over the phone. Then I heard Brian singing something and Howie laughing about something. A smile covered my lips as I listened.
"Nick," Kevin said, "Time to get off, we've got an interview."
Nick groaned, "Fine. Lisa, I'll call 'ya again sometime, I love you."
I sighed, "I love you, Nick." I hung up with a heavy heart. Somewhere on Earth Nick, my Nick was on his way to an interview and laughing with his friends. My heart hurt as I walked into the living room and sat down, flipping through the channels.
Two months later I was still in pain. Nick could only call once a week because of his schedule and even then he was rushed by Kevin. All in all, I felt our relationship was in danger. What's worse, there was a rumor about Nick seeing somebody he met at a concert and a girl in Ohio was getting the title. The girl's name was Shauntae Feagle and I wanted to cry when she made a statement on national television that she was in fact dating Nick. I had grown up with Shauntae and we, along with Deena Strausbaugh, were best friends. I had made the mistake of telling this to Liz after I had moved away and Liz must have mailed Shauntae telling her of my relationship with Nick. I sat on the couch, sobbing as I watched.
"Mrs. Feagle, is it true that you and Nickolas Carter are dating?" a woman reporter asked.
Shauntae nodded with a smug look on her face, "Yes."
A male reporter looked confused, "Then who is Lisa Booze?" this question caused an uproar from the crowd.
Shauntae waved her hand, dismissing the question, "A mistake."
Anger boiled inside me. That little…!!! I stood and turned my TV off with an angry slap. An enraged squeal escaped my throat. Why didn't Nick put a stop to this? My phone rang.
"What?" I demanded.
"Lisa, are you okay?" Nick asked.
"Yes, fine." I said sarcastically.
"Are you sure?"
I shook my head and sighed, "Nick, do you watch TV?"
"No, why?"
"Do you read newspapers?"
"Not now, why?"
I sighed, no wonder he didn't put a stop to it. "Nothing, never mind."
Nick sighed, "Lisa, are you angry at me?"
"No."
"Oh my bad."
I had to laugh, "Oh, Nicky!"
"What?!" he asked.
I laughed again, "Oh, how I love you!"
"That's what I wanted to hear!!" Nick exclaimed, "I love you too, Lisa, my darling Virgo."
Sadness entered me, "When are you going to come home again?"
Nick sighed, "Soon, I hope. Kevin wants us to stop by this tiny little country to meet fans and since I am dedicated to all my fans I said alright. Our tour will be over soon and then we'll stop there and then I'll be home."
I wanted to cry and I knew it showed in my voice, "That seems like forever."
Nick's voice sounded sad, "I know, but, baby, then I'll be home for awhile."
"I know…call me selfish but I want you here now!"
Nick laughed, "Call me selfish but I want you all for myself."
I blushed bright red, "Nicky!"
"Are you blushing?" Nick teased.
"No! What gave you that idea?"
Nick just laughed, "I can just imagine the blush!"
I sighed and leaned back into the couch, "Oh, Nick, I miss being in your arms."
Silence welcomed my statement and I listened more carefully. Faintly I heard a girls' voice exclaiming, "Look, look! Nick Carter!!!!"
I heard Nick gasp and I giggled, "Where are you?"
"Walking down the street talking on my cell phone. I know, I know, bad idea." Then he must have turned to the girls because he said, "Hey there."
A young girls voice seemed to scream, "Oh Nick, I love you so much! Your girlfriend is so lucky!!"
I held my breath and Nick seemed confused, "Um, sure. How can I help you girls?"
I let the breath out as the girl replied with, "Marry me."
Nick laughed, "I'm sorry, girls, I can't."
The girls stomped away as Nick and I laughed, "You mean you won't marry a fan?"
"Depends, are you a fan?"
I paused, "Yeah, kinda."
Nick laughed, "Um, Lisa, sorry but I have to go. Kevin is expecting me at the b-ball court."
"Alright, bye and I love you."
"Love you." we hung up and I closed my eyes, trying to picture his warm blue eyes and blond hair. It wasn't hard. I looked at my phone and made a foolish, yet hopeful, wish. "I wish Nick comes home soon and safely."
A month later I laid in my room and thought about Nick. My heart was constantly in pain and he was all I thought about. My radio was going and my bed room door stood open as I allowed myself to drift off to sleep.
As I slept I felt a object climb in bed beside me and hug me, kissing my ear. I glanced over and found myself staring straight into the most beautiful set of blue eyes I've ever seen.
"Nick?" I asked softly.
He nodded, "Yes, hi babe."
I threw my arms around his neck, jerking his face towards mine. Our kiss was a passionate one.
"Lisa? Lisa?" strangely his voice sounded like my phone.
I sat up fast, still shaking from my dream. I looked around but Nick was no where. I sighed and picked up the phone, "Yeah?"
"Lisa, I'm on my way home. Meet me at the airport." Nick said hurriedly, "See you in an hour, love 'ya!" Nick hung up.
I stood and dressed in a hurry. An hour later found me at the airport waiting anxiously for Nick. In the crowd I saw Shauntae Feagle, also waiting, Anger rose in me as the plane landed and the crowd cheered. Nick came out first, Brian shoving him through the door.
"Nick!!!" I screamed his name and, pushing past the security guards, dashed to him.
Nick dropped his bags, his blue eyes glowing, "Lisa!!!!"
I dashed into his arms and he held me close. Our lips met and the crowd cheered louder. AJ and Brian walked up behind us and watched. Shauntae darted forward and whispered in my ear.
"You're embarrassing me!"
I tore my lips from Nick's and turned on her. "Shauntae, I saw those news broadcasts that you made! You are NOT dating Nick!!"
Nick looked shocked and Shauntae pulled back, "Um…"
I took a step towards Shauntae, anger in every never of my body. Fear entered her eyes as the Backstreet boys watched nervously.