Gene Therapy


  Society is degenerating.  The population was said to have exploded a while back in the United States.  What they didn't realize, was that it was a slow rising crescendo.  The reason society is degenerating is that people with undesirable genes are doing more breeding than people with desirable ones.

  What we need to do is experiment with human gene splicing to flush out all the undesirable genes and replace them with better ones.


  The first step would be to organize a society to oversee all measures used to revitalize america's gene-pool. This organization would be led primarily by me, of course. The next step would be to fine tune gene-splicing techniques, map the human genome, and create a list of all undesirable genes.

  Of course, to be able to do these things we would need a large number of culturally diverse gunea pigs.  For this purpose, I have selected a large number of insignificant, disposable humans; the entire male population of Texass.  I realize that there are some genes that only effect women, but the best way to crack these would be to import only women suffering from these bad genes to the research facilities.  Female genes to be eradicated would include, but not be limited to;

  It is debatable whether or not being gay or straight is caused by genes, however, one of the goals of the research team will be to decide definatively either way, and if it is gene related, they will start incorporating the bisexual gene into all women.  This may not be ethical, but it would be fun.

-Desirable Genes

  Other general purpose genes to be killed off would be;

  These are only the bare minimum of genes that need to be changed to revitalize the human population of America.  These three genes are the leading causes of degradation of the American gene-pool and they must be destroyed before our country is overrun by these defective genes.

-Measures (cont.)

  The next step in this process is to sterilize all americans in an effort to stop defective recessive genes from resurfacing.  We will do this by controlling all pregnancies through gene-splicing.  In this way, women would be able to have children together without interference by men.

  This would be a costly and ongoing practice needing constant supervision by my gene research operation, but I am prepared to give my time and effort for this cause.


Author's Note;

If you've read any of the resto of my vast collection of pseudo-comedic essays, you will have noticed a great lack of offensive vernaculars.  To make up for this, I will provide a link to the material containing all of the deleted expletives after the "Philosophy" section.


I am usually a happier person, prone to optimism, but oddly enough, I'm intelligent too.
-Proceed to Deleted Expletives-