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Letters to Destiny
Hi. I read that some of the topics you might be good with are relationships with boyfriends and girlfriends and parents. Well, the question I have kind of touches on all those things. I am a parent and my daughter has just turned 16. I also thought you might be able to help me because you are right around her age. From what I read on your response page, you sound like you have a good head on your shoulders too. You know what is good for you and what is not and how to set good boundaries for your life, even if it is painful, like choosing to put yourself in custody. I hope for my daughter to be the same way, to know what she needs and do what is best for her. I think she is very smart, but as a parent, I really do worry sometimes. I am concerned because she just got her driver's license and sometimes she wants to borrow the car to go and meet friends, or to go out with guys. This is wonderful and I am happy for her - she's very attractive and gets a lot of attention. She has dated boys before, but since she was a little younger, I would always take her and drop her off somewhere, or take them both to a movie, or she would go out with a group of friends. One way or another I would always get to meet to the boy or there would be someone there that I knew and trusted. But now she wants a little more freedom. I am torn on this issue. I do trust her and I think she should have the freedom, but I don't necessarily trust the boys. There are a lot of bad things that can happen. I want to find a way that we can compromise and both she and I can feel comfortable. But I'm afraid of being too much of a controlling Mom or not enough of a protective and responsible Mom. I would like to know your opinion. What do you think some good guidelines or rules are? What are some things that I can tell her? I think a curfew is definitely a good idea, but what time is reasonable? Above all, I want her to know that I don't distrust her, but I worry about her safety and I need to feel at ease. Help! Delia |
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