Jefreys Have Social Conscience
ST. LOUIS, Missouri -- Noted pop rockers and 2016 presidential candidates the Jefreys made a generous donation to Somalian hunger relief last Saturday night. Both Jefreys took advantage of a promotion at The Billy Club in which patrons could give a canned good in lieu of the five dollar cover charge to see rock band Stevie Las Vegas and the High Rollers.
"Really, we just wanted to save some money," Bryan Erwin, Jefreys guitarist, said. "Think about it. The green beans I gave them cost me what? A dollar and a quarter? That saves me enough to get another beer or two."
Jefreys lead singer Matt Zimmer was bitter that the band had to provide payment of any type at the door.
"I thought they (Stevie Las Vegas and the High Rollers) were our friends," Zimmer said after downing several alcoholic beverages. "They could have at least put us on the guest list. Ungrateful bastards. We'll see if they get into the next Jefreys show for free."
When asked when the next Jefreys show will be, Zimmer had no response. He could only mumble something about the band being "on sabbatical" to "spend time with their families" and then cursed the reporter for suggesting the band was too unpopular to secure a gig in town. Erwin, still sober because of his role as designated driver, had to step in.
"Let me just reiterate that we're really happy to help the cause," Erwin said. "It really makes me feel good to know that we're helping starving Asians. Oh, it's in Africa? Well, whatever."
