50 Ways to Annoy/Scare People (Believe me, I know...)
Why Should You Read these?
You most likely know me, and when I ask you if you have read this yet, you can answer truthfully...(what a novel idea..)
These are fun to read, I love them...
I have included things that you might think sound a trifle farmilliar...
In no particular order...
Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
Sit in your yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see
if they slow down.
Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
If you have a glass eye, tap on it with your pen while talking to = others
Sing along at the opera. (and sing the wrong words)
Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
Practice making fax and modem noises.
Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
Staple papers in the middle of the page.
Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE. ( If you know me, you know
I HATE this)
type only in lowercase. (*ahem*)
Dont use any punctuation either
Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets ( love this one!!!).
Repeat the following conversation a dozen
"Do you hear that?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
Ask people what gender they are.
While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet. (I like this one too.)
Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
Ask your coworkers mysterious questions and then scribble the answers in a notebook. Mutter something about psychological profiles. (one my my favorites!)
Walk down the street making pig noises at people.
Tell people about a great book, and bring them a book with blank pages. Blame it on the "black market" version.
Suggest a game such as blind tag, in a sand box with barley wall, and a new concrete sidewalk near by...
Go to a concert and sing along, but sing the wrong words, or hmm classical...(unless it is classical).
Nodd and agree with people, then every 2 minutes turn your head back and forth, and blibk your eyes 10 times very quickly and then wask "What? Sorry, missed that..."
Say "Quitters never prosper hey will you cover for me for a while, I need a nap..."
Repete the SAME quote again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again...
Say "You have to times 3 by 4"
Get the last peice of cake, them go inot another room, and tell people how goodi it is and they have to go get some in the other room.
By a person a piece of cole for christm,as as a joke that they have "been bad" but them never get thema realy gift.
Say this when you make a list,"I need bread and eggs and grapes and apples and pie and cake and ham and cheese.
Never use commas.
Spell every word wrong, then yell at people who correct you...(ahem)
Go to a movie theater, and let out a screech every five minutes. When people ask, say it's a disorder, you you have a problem with those who need extra help...
Walk down the street with your arm up singing "Let's go fly a Kite".
When a person sits next to you on a bus them start pretend crying becasue they "squashed George".
Go up to a man with a women and say, "Oh so you have another wife now, so me and Judy weren't enough."
Ask people if they have seen the new episodes of shows that have been long retired. But leave before they ask when and what channel they are on.
Buy a great set of Marbles but refuse for 2 years to tell your friend where the store is.
When you are about to take a test, say" wait so ok, Sam Atoms wrote the Declairation of Independance (oh I can't spell...), Im so glad she taught us how it is a guarded fact, and Thomas Jefferson ended up getting the publicity." Tne when they all get it wrong say,"Oh, sorry, that was a the dream"
Go up to someone and say," oh my God it's you!!! Long time no see! How's the wife..." (even if they don't have a wife...)
Turn your TV so the sound is off, and then when the other person complains, turn it up, but since it is muted you won't hear anyhting. When they stil complian turn it up al the way and say, "God you must be deaf, it's up all the way..."
Tell someone you have the latest info. The give them a peice of paper with made up stuff on it. At the end write "Sucker!!!"
Go into a neighborhood woods behind the houses and yell "TIMBER" really ludly. See if people duck.
If you are alone on a street and someone walks by scream and yell "Did you just see that??" If they ask don't answer, just repete it over and over.
Tell people there is actually 50 things on this list when actually there are only 49...