| Who is TV James? | TV James Bio #2 | TV James Bio #3 | Who is Erika Amato? |
| Who is Jeff Pruitt? | Who
is RD? | RD Bio #2 | RD Bio #3 | RD Bio #4 | RD Bio #5 |
| Who is Todd
McIntosh? | Who is Apollo? | Who is Ty?
| Jeff P.
Season 3 Spoilers | JeffK's ~mere~ bio
| Who is ~mere~? |
Back to the Bronze (no frames, of course!)
Disclaimer:
All of these bios are in jest. Any similarities to actual events
(other than their respective relationships to the
"Buffy" series) are purely coincidental!
All VIP bios on this page are written by Angle Man.
Ty King is the grandson of Anastasia Romanov, the last of the Russian royal family, his family in hiding sent him out for adoption for his protection. Moving to Hollywood at the age of 16 he worked as driver for Heidi Fleiss, with many hollywood connections as a result Ty was a regular on many hollywood sets. On one of these sets he met Joss creator of Buffy. a shared obession over Fluff 'n nutter let to a firm friendship.
Ty under his guise as
writer of Passion and SAR is waiting for the start of the next
russian revolution.
Jeff Pruitt is a five time decorated war hero. The sequence in Forest Gump running through the woods carrying Gary Sinise was taken from Jeff's personal memoirs, however the experience left him in shell shock. One day, while begging for change, Jeff saw Joss Whedon attacked by a group of rabid goats. Leaping into action Jeff rescued Joss who, in gratitude, hired him as the stunt coordinator for Buffy.
Occasionaly troubled by memories of the war Jeff can be seen talking to his rubber duck Bubbles.
Season 3
Spoilers from Jeff Pruitt
SPOILERS FOR SEASON
3------------
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Angle Man appears in Sunnydale selling hyped up stories to the
National Enquirer. One article, entitiled, "Six Degrees of
The Velvet Chain" enrages Joss Whedon - who vamps out and
appears at his doorstep at midngiht (with an ax). After murder
and mayhem, the 5th Slayer appears (Anna Nicole Smith) riding a
wild goat. This leads up to the return of Angle (who is now
played by Lon Chaney's second cousin twice removed) and all hell
breaks loose. Soupy Sales dates Buffy. Tom Selleck reprises his
role as the "friend" who dates Willow. And the guys of
Sunnydale all sit around listening to old Kiss records and
drinking Schnapps. ---- That is season three in a nutshell.
(*please don't tell anyone that I told you)
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-btw - Sophia sez "Hi"-
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-END OF SPOILERS
TV James is the love child of Bill Gates. Vowing revenge on his father, who refuses to acknowledge him, TV James has become a hitman with the Yakuza. His nickname comes from his favourite method of execution: shoving his victim's head through a televison screen. While waiting for the opportunity [for revenge on his father] to strike, TV James developed the Original Bronze Posting Board at Ultimate TV.
TV James was in the inspiration for Doogie Howser, MD - except that James was a computer science genius, and he was only 10 years old when he graduated university with his Phd. Despite his awesome IQ, James would always point to the television when Doogie was on and say "That's me! I'm on TV. I'm TV James". The name stuck.
After Doogie Howser went off the air TV James devoted his energy to other projects. Between dinner and dessert one evening, TV James created the original Bronze and Buffy website. (Of course, no one actually understood why until the show premiered 9 years later.)
James is currently exploring the business world through his genetically altered gerbil now known as Bill Gates.
TV
James Bio #3
November 5, 1998
Erika Amato, secret
love child of Paul McCartney and Yoko Ono, (that explains a lot
don't it? ;-)) was raised in London in foster care until the
death of John, at which point she was brought over to live in New
York. Tired of having to be kept a secret, Erika fled New York
and her dance career and went to LA to pursue the role of a
singer. Joining with the band Velvet Chain, she has appeared
on the NKaBotFD episode of Buffy. It is rumoured that if you
play their CD Warm backwards you can hear the true story
about Ringo and Flossie the sheep.
Velvet Chain Site
RD is the youngest son of Don Bruno Giovanni, the mafia king of San Francisco. Wanting to escape the life of fast money and faster goats, RD moved to LA and tried to live life right. RD made his living as a tour guide to the dead movie star homes. It was during this tour he met David Greenwalt, co-executive producer for "Buffy". David was heavily in debt, and was on the run from the local mob. The goons, recognizing RD, ran. RD used his connections to pay off David's debt, and he in gratitude hired RD as his assisstant. Despite his new life. RD is tormented by -mere-, an FBI agent determind to probe RD until she can find the dirt to bring down his infamous father.
RD is the long lost heir to the throne of England. Born of the Plantagenent family, desecended from Edward IV (one of the supposedly murdered princes) The Plantagenet family or Price as they were calling themselves (the PRICE of freedom being the loss of their name) survived it's way through trials and tribulations of history by being quiet and unassuming, carefully keeping track of the family history, should the chance arise to take the throne. However mounting such a claim will take much money. So RD travelled to Hollywood looking for big money. He found it in the role of blackmailer, in his unassuming role as Personal Assistant to Buffy Co-Executive Producer David Greenwalt. RD has collected enough dirt on various celebrities both in and not in the cast to amass a 'King's Ransom' Together with his bodyguard/personal assassin -mere- they wait for the death of Elizabeth II for the perfect time to strike.
Other ambitions include getting to the cookies before -mere- does.
RD is the last of the global explorers. Since the age of 6 he has sailed the oceans looking for uncharted islands. 5 years ago he found one. Naming it Pricenia, RD went to Hollywood to try and sell his story. Not only was he rejected by every studio, but the Rand corporation took over his island and mined it for rare minerals. Completely broke, RD took a job as the Personal Assistant to David Greenwalt (co-executive producer for Buffy). Currently RD is exploring apartments searching for the hidden cookies of NE and StG.
RD is the inspiration for the movie "The Full Monty". A former steelworker, he turned to stripping when the plant closed. His natural dancing ability (as well as other talents), caught the attention of others and he became a professional (dancer) Hired for Joss' bachelor party as a joke by his fiancee. RD was so nervous, he tripped and ruined his ankle costing him his job. Joss, feeling guilty, got him a job as co-executive producer David Greenwalt's assistant.
RD's ankle has since recovered and he now moonlights as a private dancer (a very private dancer, if he wants to live ;-)) It's good work, but the cookie crumbs in the g string are very uncomfortable.
RD stands for Recreation Droid, a state of the art android prototype designed to be the ultimate trophy husband for Hollywood wives. (The female model, known today as Pamela Anderson had some serious flaws in it's AI program.) After sufficient testing RD was given a trial run in the populace. All was going well, and Ms. Zsa Zsa Gabor was ready to take permanent possession, when RD got attacked in a mugging. The beating somehow caused him to develop a sense of will, and he left. RD eventually got a job working as the personal assistant to David Greenwalt (co-executive producer for Buffy), where he is happy. RD has since been tracked down by Dr. -mere-, the original personality programmer for the RD project. By allowing him certain freedoms, combined with giving him a careful diet of cookies, Dr -mere- has succesfully re-established RD's original programming - including a reset of the devotion protocols, much to Ms. Gabor's disappointment.
Todd McIntosh was born Piotr Ivanov Tresnyev in Russia. Child of an acrobatic family in the Moscow circus, Piotr traveled all over. Happy times ended when young Piotr saw the KGB 'replace' a diplomat who was putting his nose into the wrong corners. On the run for years, Piotr learned all the tricks of disguise and makeup. This came in handy while hiding in LA. The FBI persuaded Joss to hire Todd, as he is now known. Joss readily agreed, to avoid an incident with a certain personal assistant and the Torrance High School Mascot coming to light. Todd waits to testify against his former country while learning English and the proper way to order coffee in Starbucks.
Apollo is named after the NASA rocketship program, because he was the the first child born in space. (a secret program testing the viability of humans living in space) Tired of the numerous tests, Apollo left NASA at the age of 18 and moved to California where he got a job as the Webgod for the Buffy site. He is content but still every night he gets the urge to go home, which explains the collection of various engines and pieces of sheet metal growing in his backyard.
(This one was written by JeffK, not by Angle Man)
The person of ~mere~
exists only as an online persona. The name is used by any of the
BtVS cast members when they want to discreetly post on the board.
Therefore, ~mere~ really is Aly ,SMG, and Joss. ~mere~ is also
Nicky, James, Charisma, and whoever else wants to use the name.
The most frequent ~mere~ perpetrator, however, is RD. He
continually posts as ~mere~ (notice how they're always together)
in an effort to maintain a credibility and consistancy to the
~mere~ persona. This has been going on for some time now, and the
truth was destined to come out sooner or later.
-JeffK
IFS, WPWP
PS- The original ~mere~ was captured shortly after her arrival in
LA, and is currently being held prisoner, chained to the wall of
the fraternity house basement set from Reptile Boy.
Before her appearance in the Bronze, almost nothing is known about -mere-. But once she arrived it was apparent that it would soon become her personal playground. She quickly gained devotees through her charms, her evility and threats of using her stilettos of death. Once the Bronze was subdued, next stop the world. Teaming up with Blade, their "They Don't Suck" campaign worked wonders and she became Vice President of The Whole Wide World. Once the entire world was under her sassy shoe, she focused her attentions on LA, working slowly as a personal assistant on the show Strange World. It is inevitable that she will be the next Joss, and just maybe she'll be able to talk to him without nudging.
btw under all that evil she really is, well, not nice
If you are in
possesion of an Angle Man bio that isn't on this page,
please e-mail it to the address below! I'll run it by Angle
Man and, if he ok's it, I'll add it to the page.
(-Lisa)
Back to the Bronze (no frames, of course!)
Back to the PHBA Home Page
Disclaimer: All of
these bios are in jest. Any similarities to actual events (other
than their respective relationships to the "Buffy"
series) are purely coincidental!
Email: ldw_bookworm@hotmail.com
