"If you'd judged Sekhmet guilty, there was a chance that the dead would have destroyed her. At the very least, it might have given us some more time." The Doctor shook his head. "As it is, you've probably set her free."

 Bernice stopped and leaned against a wall. "Doctor, what the hell is going on?"

 The Doctor sighed in frustration. "Sekhmet was a prisoner of the Osirians, because she was one of the very few who believed in Sutekh's teachings, that the Osirians should be a much more active part of the universe and control the destinies of the lesser races. She was sealed in this tomb and the dead were set to guard her. Now that they've gone, Sekhmet is, or will be, set free. And we haven't got time to talk about this any more, so let's go!"

 With that, the Doctor raced on.

 At the focal point of the pyramid, a figure stirred into wakefulness. Rising from her sarcophagus, Sekhmet gathered her bearings and looked around at the temple.

 NOW SHALL THIS INSIGNIFICANT WORLD BE DESTROYED.

 [Cue Indiana Jones theme music ...]

 Doctor Who
The Crossover Internet Adventures #3
****************
Indiana Jones and The Osiran Legacy
Episode Thirteen: "Too Many Deus Ex Machina!"
by Jeffery Beuck

 Until a few minutes ago, Indiana had believed he was in good physical shape. What with being chased by tribes of natives, Nazis, and giant rolling boulders every time he went exploring, he had to be, didn't he? But he could hardly keep up with this middle-aged Doctor fellow as he strode quickly through the temple, toward its center.

 By the time he caught up with the Doctor, panting from lack of breath, the eccentric fellow had already begun stringing up string in a seemingly random pattern all over a temple antechamber, winding it all around pillars and tombs and statues in a chaotic pattern. "What are you doing, Doc?"

 "Laying an extremely clever trap for Sekhmet. Pardon me," he said as he unrolled his ball of string just in front of Indy's face.

 Benny came into the chamber next, even more out of breath than Indy. "What--"

 "Laying a trap for Sekhmet."

 "Oh."

 Marcus made it into the chamber several moments after Benny. He looked about ready to collapse.

 "There's our rotten egg," Benny joked. "Doctor, is there anything we can do to help you?"

 "Thank you, no, just try to stay out of the way and don't disturb anything. I'm laying a very precise pattern and the slightest strand out of place could ruin the entire plan."

 A fireball erupted, seemingly from nowhere, just missing the Doctor by inches. It plowed into the side of a sarcophagus, charring the stone black.

 In the doorway to the central chamber stood the unmistakeable form of an Osiran.

 "No!" hissed the Doctor in anger. "I'm not ready yet!" He turned to Indy and Benny. "Distract her for a few minutes while I finish the pattern!" he whispered.

 "Excuse me??" Benny whispered back incredulously. "You want us to distract a being with godlike powers who could incinerate us with a wave of her little finger while you rig up some pathetic cat's cradle that she could cut through like melted I Can't Believe It's Not Butter?"

 "This pattern has a profound significance to Osiran engineers... I just hope Sekhmet recognizes it after being locked in a tomb for several millenia... and that she happened to have taken an O-level class in Osiran physics."

 "Oh, splendid. You're going to owe me a drink when this is over."

 "WHAT IS THIS?" boomed the thoughts of Sekhmet as she noticed the strange pattern of string criss-crossing the room.

 "Aw, hell with it," muttered Indy. "Out of the frying pan..." Ducking between a few strands of the Doctor's string contraption, he dodged out into the center of the room.

 "Indy, you idiot!" growled Benny. I'm not going to let him be the hero of this adventure, thought Benny, gritting her teeth. No, who are you fooling, Summerfield? You're a sucker for a handsome man in a leather jacket. You'll never get to kiss him if you let him die. Knowing she'd probably regret it later, she dived under the string after him.

 The Doctor weaved and bobbed with his ball of string, creating one more complex pattern with the string, then coming over to the pillar where Marcus was standing and wrapping it around the pillar once. "Put your finger here," he requested. Marcus obliged. The Doctor tied the string in a little knot, took out his knife, and cut the string short. "One more thing to do," he whispered to Marcus.

 "INSIGNIFICANT CREATURES... NOW SHALL I LAY YOUR WORLD TO DUST."

 Indiana Jones strode pathetically unmenacingly up to the great figure of Sekhmet. With one hand on his whip, he doffed his hat with the other. "Hello, Indiana Jones. Pleased to meet you. As a representative of the planet Earth, I'd like to welcome you to our insignificant little planet, and would be happy to offer my services as tour guide... I know this great little restaurant in Japan where the ladies--"

 "INSECTS! I SHALL DESTROY YOU ALL." Sekhmet raised her hand to fire at the intrepid explorer.

 "Stop!"

 All eyes turned toward the Doctor.

 "I wouldn't do that if I were you, Sekhmet," the Doctor announced smugly, resting his hands on the red question-mark-handled umbrella before him. Indy could have sworn the Doctor hadn't brought that in with him.

 "YOU ARE POWERLESS TO STOP ME..." Benny felt a light touch across her brain. "... TIME LORD."

 "Oh, am I?" The Doctor twirled the umbrella on one finger and touched it to the nearest piece of string running askew between two pillars in front of him. "In case you didn't notice, you're currently standing in the midst of a high-energy neural feedback net. Now that the circuit is complete, if you try to fire one of your little psychokinetic energy balls at us, you'll find that the energy will be turned back upon you and magnified a thousand times. Not to mention the fact that if you touch the net, your mind, your will, and all of your psychokinetic powers will be diluted to nothing and you will cease to exist."

 Benny had to admire the Time Lord--he had gall.

 "YOU LIE."

 The Doctor frowned.

 "THE MINDS OF THE HUMANS BEFORE ME REVEAL THAT THE NETWORK IS COMPOSED OF NOTHING MORE THAN STRANDS OF A CRUDE VEGETABLE MATTER. THIS IS A TRICK."

 "N-no, it's not!" the Doctor said, a little too hurriedly. "They believe it is simply made of string, but it is in fact a super-psycho-sensitive Time Lord polymer. I assure you it is quite effective! And you dare not try to read my mind to see if I am telling the truth because I am outside the loop and your mind will become trapped inside of it if you try to reach beyond it!"

 Benny cringed. That sounded weak, even to her. The Doctor's pitiful plan wasn't going to work this time. She tried to think of a Plan B, but nothing came to her.

 "ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE." Sekhmet raised her hand to release an energy bolt. Well, it's been fun, Benny thought, as she and Indy dived to the ground.

 "No, Sekhmet! Don't!" the Doctor pleaded, flipping a switch on his umbrella and touching it to the string one last time.

 Sekhmet released an energy bolt.

 As soon as the bolt crossed the Doctor's network of string, the entire network of string lit up with an eerie blue light. The bolt flashed back and forth between the strands of string faster than the eye could follow, magnifying in power with each bounce, until at last it flew back over Benny and Indy's heads and smacked into Sekhmet, illuminating her in a deathly electric glow. For a moment, as the energy bolt sizzled around Sekhmet's body, Benny imagined she could see Sekhmet's skeleton illuminated by the blast.

 Sekhmet gave an unearthly howl of pain. As the energy strands finished playing around her body, she collapsed to the ground.

 "Well, I'll be dammed," mumbled Indy, as he and Benny slowly inched back toward the Doctor.

 "Don't cross the energy net!" the Doctor yelled to his companions. "It's still active!"

 Benny looked around, but could see no way out of the net other than to exit through the door in which Sekhmet had come. "Well, how are we supposed to get out of here?" Benny called.

 "You... shall... not..." whispered Sekhmet with her vocal cords, crawling towards them. Unsure how much power Sekhmet still possessed, Indy and Benny began to back away from her.

 "You... tricked me... Time Lord..." the Osiran whispered.

 "You tricked yourself," the Doctor retorted disdainfully. "Now that your power has been drained, you have only one recourse open to you."

 Sekhmet breathed heavily through damaged lungs. She didn't reply. Instead, she began dragging herself slowly toward a control panel along one wall which somehow hadn't been covered by the Doctor's network of string. "I shall... return... Time Lord," Sekhmet hissed.

 "Doctor, what should we do?" Benny asked.

 The Doctor stared stoically at the crawling Osiran. "There's not much else we can do," he replied. "Sekhmet will go to Mars and rejeuvenate herself. It will take many years, though, now that Mr. Brody has dispersed the minds that Sekhmet was planning to feed upon. That will buy the Earth some time, though not enough, I'm afraid."

 "Bugger."

 Sekhmet reached the panel. "Farewell, Time Lord... the next time we meet... you shall not be so fortunate." She reached out hesitantly and pressed a switch.

 Benny grabbed Indiana's hat from his head and threw it after Sekhmet.

 Both Sekhmet and the hat vanished.

 "What did you do that for?" Indy growled. "That was my best hat!"

 "I'm just restoring the web of time." She took the hat from her head and plonked it onto Indy's head. "There. Back where it belongs." She turned to the Doctor on the other side of the energy web. "Okay, Einstein, how do we get out of here?"

 "Well, you can either wait several weeks for the energy in the net to dissipate..."

 "Or?"

 "Or you can escape the same way Sekhmet did--via the transmat, with a little coordinate reprogramming, of course."

 "So," Marcus piped up, "that takes care of Sekhmet, then, doesn't it?"

 The Doctor sighed. "I'm afraid not. Sekhmet has returned to Mars to regenerate. I'm afraid I've only bought the Earth some time. In a few years, she'll be as powerful as ever and will return here to destroy the Earth."

 "Noooo."

 Everyone turned toward the sound. Zeitflur--no longer possessed by the Pharoah--was leaning in the doorway to Sekhmet's tomb, using the last of his strength. "I will not allow the god to return. I will make the Earth safe for the Third Reich. The Pharoah has shown me how."

 Indy stood up and drew out his whip. Zeitflur shambled toward him and raised his hand. Indy staggered backwards into a sarcophagus. Benny took a step toward him, and she likewise was repelled. Zeitflur staggered over to the transmat control panel and stabbed at several buttons.

 "No!" the Doctor called. "Zeitflur, you don't know what you're doing!"

 "Bwa-ha-ha," Zeitflur hacked, coughing up some blood. "I know *exactly* what I'm doing. Sekhmet shall never return here." Zeitflur pressed one last button and collapsed to the floor. His eyes stared into space, dead.

 Benny and Indy could hear a throbbing, humming sound at the edge of their hearing which slowly became louder. "He's set the pyramid's energy source to auto-destruct!" the Doctor called, panicked.

 "Um, Doc, we're still trapped on this side of your stringy thing!" Indy pointed out, a note of panic beginning to creep into his voice also.

 "Zeitflur!" the Doctor exclaimed. "The Pharoah must have known a secret entrance into the tomb! Quickly! Look in the other room!"

 Benny wasted no time grabbing Indy's hand and pulling him into Sekhmet's tomb. They instantly went to work looking for a secret door, fanatically pressing bricks and moulding and pulling and twisting statues. The humming became louder.

 "Well, future girl, didn't your special archaeological training teach you any futuristic tricks to finding secret doors and panels?" Indy asked, pushing and prodding items in the tomb at an ever-increasing pace.

 "No, I'm afraid that's still something best left to experience," Benny replied, kicking at panels on Sekhmet's tomb.

 "Or luck," Indy announced as he pushed the glyph of an eye and a hidden door swung inward. They looked at each other for just a second and darted through it. Behind them, part of the ceiling in Sekhmet's chamber collapsed. The throbbing of the energy source grew louder.

 "I don't suppose you brought a lamp?" Benny asked as they quickly found themselves in complete darkness. Indy stopped, stared at her, and then ran back toward Sekhmet's tomb. "What are you doing?!" Benny called after him.

 "Getting us some light!" Indy called. Dodging some falling debris, he ran back into the antechamber where Marcus and the Doctor were waiting impatiently for them. "We found another way out--I hope," Indy told him. The Doctor breathed a sigh of relief. Indy grabbed a wooden staff stuck into the wall and snapped it off. He then bent over Zeitflur's body and started going through the pockets. He pulled out a book of matches triumphantly. The matchbook had a swastika embossed on its cover. "Nazi matches," Indy muttered. He lit one and held it to the staff, impatiently waiting for it to catch fire. "Go on, Doctor, Marcus; we'll meet you outside."

 "Take care of yourselves," the Doctor said compassionately.

 "Good luck, Indy," Marcus called.

 "Thanks," Indy said, as the staff caught fire. Just as he moved toward the door to Sekhmet's tomb, a pillar crashed into the spot where he had been standing. He shuddered to think that he might have been caught under it, then jogged back to Benny who was still waiting for him in the secret corridor.

 "'Let there be light,'" Benny quipped. She let Indy move forward and lead the way with the faint light of the torch.

 About five steps later, Indy fell through a weak spot in the floor. He grabbed for the edge of the hole, dropping the torch. He heard it hit water and fizz out about 2 seconds later. They could hear the rush of water about 30 feet below them, barely drowning out the sound of the energy build-up of the pyramid's auto destruct.

 "Stay back!" Indy yelled.

 "Where are you? I can't see anything!"

 "I'm about a foot in front of you. Get down on your hands and knees and feel for the edge."

 Benny dropped to her knees and cautiously made her way toward the edge. The pyramid shook ominously, unbalancing her.

 "Ow!" Indy yelled as her shoulder fell onto his hand.

 "Sorry!"

 The pyramid shook again and some of the floor crumbled away from Indy's injured hand. Indy lost his grip and swung precariously by one hand.

 "I could use some help here!" Indy called.

 Benny felt along the edge of the hole. "I'm trying to find you!"

 "Who's up there?" another voice called from beyond the hole in the floor.

 "Jock? Is that you?"

 "Indy?"

 "Jock!"

 "Indy! It's me--and Xicowl... we were trapped in the pyramid by a stone collapse. Where are you?" Jock's voice was becoming precariously close.

 "Jock! Stay back! There's a gigantic hole in the floor!"

 "What? How do you know?"

 "Because I fell through it and I'm currently hanging on for dear life by one hand!"

 The darkness was shattered by a scream. Jock yelled, "Xicowl!" They heard a splash below. "I think Xicowl just fell through the hole!"

 "I'm going to be joining him very shortly if someone doesn't pull me up here!"

 The pyramid shook once again, and this time the tremor was terrible. Benny found Indy's hand and grabbed it, just as the floor all along the corridor began to fall away. "Oh, cruk!" Benny yelled as she suddenly found herself in freefall, holding Indy's hand, surfing through the air on a rough chunk of stone which had once been the floor. In the second she had left before she hit, she pushed away from the rock and hit the water like a cannonball, letting go of Indy's hand, and trying her best to find the surface. After several agonizing seconds, her head broke the surface. She could hear torrents of rushing water all around her. She was in some kind of underground river, being carried along by the current. After spitting out a mouthful of water, she called, "Indy!!"

 A few feet behind her, she heard a cough and a splutter. "Benny?" More coughing and choking. Benny felt herself thrown into and over a rock. That was going to leave a bruise. In the utter darkness of this nightmare river, anything could be lying ahead -- rocks, waterfalls, rapids, perhaps even a tunnel where there was no air. Benny took a deep lungful of air before being pulled underwater again temporarily.

 When she resurfaced, she could hear someone shouting from up ahead. "Who's there? Is anyone else still there?" Her head dunked underwater for a second, but when she bobbed up she heard a familar voice nearby.

 "Benny? Keep talking -- I'm almost to you!" It was Indy.

 "Hello?" came a call from far ahead. It was just barely audible over the rushing of the water.

 "I'm here, Indy. Who's that up ahead?"

 Something living touched her arm, and Benny nearly sucked in a mouthful of water to scream. She felt a human hand grip her and breathed a sigh of relief. "Benny? Is that you?" It was Indy.

 "Right here. I'm glad you're all right."

 "Hello?"

 Nearby.

 "Jock?" called Indy.

 "Right--" some splashing and panting "--here. I've found a piece of timber to hang onto. I'm fine."

 "You wouldn't happen to have found a piece for us, would you?" gurgled Benny between breaths.

 "Help!" came a cry from far ahead.

 "That sounds like Xicowl," Jock said.

 Benny could hear the deep sound of rushing water grow louder ahead.

 "Damn," said Indy. "Do you hear what I hear?"

 "If you're referring to the imminent waterfall, then yes, I hear it too."

 "I was hoping you wouldn't say that."

 A scream from far ahead. It lasted several about two seconds.

 "Get ready for it!"

 The next few moments were among the tensest of Benny's life. She was being carried along an underground river, blind, helpless, knowing she was about to be pitched off the edge of a waterfall at any moment. The sound of falling water grew louder and louder with each passing second.

 Suddenly, she was falling again.

 She screamed.

 She felt Indy push away from her so that he wouldn't land on her--or vice versa. A moment later, she hit the water below with a mighty splash. Just as when she had fallen through the hole in the pyramid tunnel, she found herself struggling wearily toward the surface and its precious air. She was so tired. She almost wanted to cease the struggle and give up. Then her head broke the surface and she was safe again... for the time being.

 Benny took several mouthfuls of air, then heard Indy's voice from several feet away: "Benny? Jock?... Xicowl?"

 "You can't... get rid of me... that easily..." Benny managed to call.

 She heard Indy splashing toward her, then felt the warmth of his hand on her arm again. "I'm not sure the others made it--I caught one of my feet on a rock on the way down the waterfall. If one of the others hit it head on, they're probably done for."

 Benny let the current carry them forward.

 A few seconds later, they smacked into a wall.

 "Wonderful. I was afraid of this," said Indy. "This water's got to go somewhere... probably an underground tunnel. I hope we can find it."

 "I can feel a current tugging at my feet. I think we're fairly close."

 "Get your breath back, and then take a really, really deep breath. I hope it's enough to get us through the tunnel."

 Just as Marcus came to believe that the pitch of the energy generators in the pyramid couldn't rise any higher, the Doctor pushed him to the ground, and the Great Pyramid exploded. A thick layer of dust and debris fell atop them. Marcus tried to get up and then decided to stay where he was. He heard the Doctor rise next to him and brush dust off his jacket, then grab Marcus' hand and pull him up.

 "Thank you," Marcus said. "I hope Indy and Benny were able to find another way out of the pyramid before..." he gestured toward the crumbled stone blocks that were all that remained of the once awe-inspiring monument.

 The Doctor smiled. "Professors Summerfield and Jones are quite resourceful. I'm sure they managed to escape somehow. They'll probably be waiting for us back at my ship." The Doctor and Marcus began to walk back in the direction of the TARDIS.

 Benny suddenly found herself spat forth from the tunnel, out over a small cataract, and into the Amazon below. Indy wasn't far behind. Benny struggled wearily to the surface for a third time, and then relaxed in the smoothly flowing water of the world's greatest river. She spread out her arms and floated lazily. They were safe now.

 Indy paddled over to her. "Don't relax yet... you can relax when we're safely on land."

 Benny groaned. "You're no fun."

 A yell cut the air, and Benny and Indy turned to see another person ejected from the tunnel into the river below.

 "Was that Xicowl?" Benny squinted.

 "I think so."

 Xicowl's head broke the surface, and he saw them and smiled. He began paddling towards them.

 "Xicowl! Have you seen Jock?"

 "No! Have you?"

 Suddenly, Benny felt a bite at her ankle, near the place where her leg had been scraped by the rock in the underground river. "Ow!"

 Indy turned to her. "What?"

 Something nipped at her ankle again. "Something's biting me!"

 "Oh, hell," Indy said. "Piranhas."

 "What??!"

 Xicowl continued swimming toward them, making large splashes in the water. Suddenly, he screamed.

 "Stay completely still!" Indy called.

 "They're biting me!" Xicowl screamed, kicking and splashing at something underwater.

 "Stay still! They're attracted by motion and blood!"

 Xicowl screamed again, and Benny could see the water near him turning red. Benny felt another nip on her leg. She felt like she was going to be sick.

 "Get them off! Get them off!" Xicowl cried. He panicked and began splashing and kicking even more furiously.

 He disappeared under the water.

 "Now," Indy said, "start paddling slowly toward the shore." Benny nodded and did as he suggested. Bubbles of air and blood erupted from the spot where Xicowl had been. As they distanced themselves from the piranhas, they picked up speed and began swimming steadily for land. After an eternity, they reached it, and collapsed upon the muddy bank.

 "Please tell me we're not going to be attacked by alligators now," Benny joked, lying face-up in the mud, too tired to move.

 "I doubt it," Indy panted.

 Benny heard a twig snap and summoned the strength to turn her head to look in its direction.

 And immediately wished she hadn't.

 "HUMANS," Cleo spat.

 Indy scrambled to his knees. "This ordeal is never going to be over, is it?"

 Benny barely managed to roll over onto her stomach when she felt a sudden pressure at her throat. Indy gagged.

 Cleo/Sekhmet had her hand outstretched toward them. "YOU SHALL DIE FOR YOUR PITIFUL ATTEMPT TO IMPRISON ME ON THE FOURTH PLANET."

 Indy gasped for breath but was losing the struggle. "It... was... nice... knowing you... Professor... Summerfie--ack!" he gasped, clutching at his throat. Cleo/Sekhmet smiled evilly.

 Just as Benny was about to lose consciousness, a gunshot rang out. Cleo's eyes glowed red for a moment more, then turned black. She pitched forward into the mud.

 Clark stood behind her, a pistol in his shaking hands. "I had to do it... she wasn't... Cleo any longer," he said, more to himself than to the duo he had just saved.

 Indy breathed in deeply, hands on his thighs. Benny just closed her eyes and said a prayer of thanks to whatever deities might have existed and seen her through this nightmare.

 "Thanks, pal," Indy said, rising steadily to his feet. He reached out with one foot and prodded Cleo warily, afraid the spirit of Sekhmet might still be alive within her. "Nope. Definitely dead this time. She must have used the last of her awareness to transfer herself to Cleo right before she zapped herself back to Mars." He looked down at the poor woman. "Dead as a doorknob."

 Clark knelt down before the remains of his ex-wife and cried. Benny managed to stand, while Indy walked down to the river and pulled out his hat, which had just happened to pick that moment to float by. As Indy wrung the water from his hat, Benny limped over to where Clark was sobbing over the body of his dead wife. She stood behind him respectfully as he grieved for his lost love.

 The Doctor stopped whistling. "Nonsense. I know for a fact... well, never mind. Anyway, here comes someone now."

 Jock stumbled out of the woods, a big smile across his face. "Ah! Civilization!"

 Marcus went over to him and greeted him. "Jock! You're alive! Have you seen any of the others?"

 "I was with Indy, Benny, and Xicowl in an underground river which we had fallen into when the pyramid collapsed, but then I managed to find a ledge with a tunnel leading back to the surface. I haven't seen the others since."

 "The others are right here," came the voice of Indy from the other side of the TARDIS. Indy stepped around the blue box, his arm around Benny, followed closely by a forlorn-looking Clark.

 "See? I told you," the Doctor grinned to Marcus. "Professors Jones and Summerfield. So good to see you again. I knew you'd make it out of the pyramid."

 "Xicowl wasn't as lucky," Benny said softly, then looked up at Indiana.

 He smiled at her

 She smiled back.

 He kissed her.

 The Doctor coughed for attention. "Well, now that we've found the answer to your little mystery, Bernice, I think it's time we were on our way."

 Benny pouted. "Can't we stay for just a little while?"

 "A stitch in time cleans grime. Chop chop. I'm sure Professor Jones and his friends here are eager to get back to America and put their treasures from the great Amazonian Pyramid on display."

 "Treasures? What treasures?"

 Marcus smiled sheepishly and held out several gold, Egyptian statuettes which he had managed to collect on his way out of the pyramid.

 "Tomb robber," Benny teased.

 "That's archaeology, my dear," Marcus smiled.

 Indy clasped her hand and shook it. "Well, this is good-bye then."

 "Yes," Benny said sadly. She grabbed him around the neck and kissed him one last time.

 The Doctor paused in the doorway of the TARDIS. "Um, would any of you like a ride back to America?"

 Benny laughed and turned to the group. "I'd stick with Jock if I were you. If you come with us, you're liable to end up on the other side of the galaxy."

 Indy smiled and shook his head. "Thanks, but I'm afraid there'd be a little too much explaining to do if we suddenly turned up in the middle of a meeting of old, bureaucratic faculty members in a blue box that just happened to appear out of thin air. Come on, Jock, Marcus. I think I'll stick to the Earth for a while."

 The Doctor disappeared into the TARDIS. Benny waved to the group and disappeared after him. With a loud wheezing and groaning, the TARDIS faded into nothingness.

 "Well, I'll be damned," Jock muttered, mouth agape in amazement.

 "Not yet," Indy said. "You've got to get us home." With a crack of his whip, they headed back into the woods toward Jock's plane.

 The End!!