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~Adam Lee Oftedahl~

I love Adam so much and I miss him so much..on here yAh can read about the day he died..about MY day.. if you want. its long

Click on the 'Stuff for Adam' link & yah can write what yah wanna in it...And you can read what other people have written.. it only shows one of them at a time here..

This is my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE pic of Adam, Carrie, Kelsey, and Bri.. don't they all look so perfect n happy...notice the date it was taken too..

My StorY oF APRIL 26, 2000..
Adam was my 2nd cousin ~ but since him and my whole family were so close to eachother, we always considered ourselves 1st cousins. On Wednesday, April 26th, 2000, I was in school having probably one of the best and one of saddest days of my whole life ~ little did I know that it would soon become the most memorable. See, the whole 7th grade was having an all-day thing where we would play some games, sing songs, learn about peer pressure, socializing, and all of that. When it was about time to leave, we did something I thought was so wonderful. They had everybody sit in a huge circle. In the middle of the circle was a bowl of water surrounded by small stones. There was also a microphone. They played very soft, soothing music. They called this "The Pebble in the Pond," because whoever wanted to could go upto the bowl, put in a pebble, say whatever they wanted to about life, and leave the ripple they made in the water to effect everyone else sitting there listening. It was such a sad thing to do...people went up there telling about how much they cared about their friends, how much they wished they wouldn't have done and said so many bad things, what effect other people have had on them throughout their life, or gave advice to the other people through experiences they have had. Most of the people were crying, some left, others left to help them, some couldn't even talk when they got up to the microphone because they were so choked up. Well it was just a little bit after I had went up into the middle of the circle and said sorry to a few people that someone came to get me. They took me out of the gym to where i found my aunt waiting for me. Instantly I knew something was wrong. I thought it was my parents or my siblings...I was so wrong. She just put her arm around me and said that I had to leave right now. I kept asking what was wrong, I was so scared, confused, and frightened, and I was already crying due to the earlier events. Finally she said, "It's Adam." I asked what happened. She told me he was in a farming accident. I asked her if he was ok...she said "No, he's not ok." I said, "Well what's wrong? Is he gonna be ok?" She just said, "No, I'm sorry Gussy, but I'm afraid Adam isn't with us anymore." I could not believe it. I just started bawling and yelling and screaming...we were walking up the stairs to my locker. I know kids probably heard me and thought I was crazy, but that's probably because I was. I didn't even care about my homework, I just grabbed my backpack, furiously closed my locker, and said "Ok, let's go." We walked out to her car without saying a word, her arm around me, still crying. We got in and she started driving. She told me we were going to the hospital so that I could see my parents, and so that they could see me. She told me Audrey, Sara, Wendy, Anton, Perry, and Deanna were there too. She told me Josey was at Dean's house trying to rest. Other than that it was just silence. But in my mind, it was much more than that. So many thoughts were going through my head..."It can't be true. It's not true. I'm just dreaming ~ no I'm not dreaming..yes, I am ~ YES you are, gussy, you're dreaming ~ It's NOT real. It's not happening. Adam...O Adam...Why? What even happened? A farm accident? What kind? Wasn't he in school? Where? What am I gonna do tomorrow? What will I say to my friends? What will they think, do, say? I wonder if Kara and Amber are still mad at me?..Why doesn't Jacob like me?...God Gussy, you're so selfish. Stop thinking about yourself and your little problems ~ what about Perry, Deanna, Carrie, Kelsey, and Bri? What about Kelsey's birthday? What about the baby shower? What about the house? What about graduation? What about the family reunion? Where will we have it? Will it still be at Adam's? He won't be there. I wouldn't have any fun. Last year was so fun. I remember when Adam gave everyone a ride on his four-wheeler at one of those family reunions. I was the one in the very back, and everybody had gotten off so he could do a U-turn to go back home. When people got back on, I was still in the back, and I wasn't fully on yet. Adam started driving away and I fell off the back and burnt my leg on something in the back of it. They had to stop and pick me up. By the time I got back I was bawling (I've always been known as the cry-baby of the family). Another family reunion I remember is when all the bigger cousins were watching Scream ~ the new scary movie that had just come out. I really wanted to watch, so I just walked in and sat down. Josey told me to leave because I would get nightmares ~ but Adam said I could stay. I stayed. Another time is when Adam and Teresa made a fire down in the woods and we sat there and talked. Another family reunion memory is when Aunt Ellie always had those treasure hunts. Adam was helping me find all the 'treasure.' I did good that year. (: I can't believe it...Why?" When we got to the hospital, Sara and Audrey were standing outside on the lawn. I got out and ran over to them and we hugged for the longest time. Just standing there sobbing...I walked inside and saw my parents, Perry and Deanna, and Wendy and Anton standing in the lobby. I had never seen my dad cry before ~ except for when my mom had cancer. I gave everybody a huge hug...I still can not believe it. My mom wanted Wendy and Anton to bring me home. On the way there, they made the mood of it all seem so happy. They didn't talk about Adam once. They just talked about 'what grade are you going into?', 'how old are you?'...Stuff like that. I was glad because in the days to come i knew it would be terrible. They dropped me off and I just went into the kitchen and sat down on a stool. I just sat. I don't even remember thinking, I just sat..I just sat..and sat..and sat...Audrey came home and gave my Dad a big hug and my Dad was like, "He was such a good boy.." And Audrey was like, "WHY??"...It just made me start bawling and thinking again. That night I did NOT sleep more than 4 hours ~ but I'm sure that's more than most people got. The next day I decided to go to school, because if I sat at home by myself all I could do would be to think, and I didn't want that. On the bus NOBODY said anything ~ except for some little boys playing with action figures...The bus that then took me to Clarkfield was different. I couldn't even sit down without starting to cry. I know people were looking at me like I was just dumb, but I didn't care. I could NOT help it. I sit with Jill on the bus, and by the time she got on, Brooke was already sitting with me giving me a hug. Jill knew right away and just sat where Brooke usually sits. I had no idea how everybody knew about it already ~ later I figured out that they all just 'heard' it...? But I guess you know how that goes...News travels fast...School was bad. I went straight to my locker and didn't talk to anybody. I don't think anybody wanted to talk to me ~ they all knew. Well the gist of that day was that after first hour I was just a wreck ~ I could NOT concentrate or think. I ended up not going to any classes after lunch...me and all my friends just sat in a room and talked, cried, laughed sometimes ~ very little, thought to ourselves, and just sat. We just sat. I did a lot of just sitting. I don't really remember much after that...well I do remember that the nurse just about ran out of Tylenol, and the whole school DID run out of Keenexes...that's pretty bad. In that little room, we all sat in a cirle and said a very long prayer. Everyone said what they wanted to ~ and every single person's little 'blurb' meant SO much to me, to Adam, to Perry and Deanna, to Carrie. And in that little room, we all found out how much friends REALLY matter, and how we should never leave a person without forgiving them, because it may be the last time you see them ~ until heaven...We were all so close after that. It was actually really awesome, I loved it. It was kinda like world peace ~ but not that big...I have to admit that it did get kind of boring at some points...(:...but that's not a bad thing.
I love Adam very much, I love my friends, I love my family, I love myself...the only difference is that I don't have to miss my friends, my family, or myself...and I don't have to live without them...and I don't have to think about why they had to die...and I don't wonder why they left me so suddenly...but the similar thing is that I love them all...and I always will...
So do me a favor, and always tell people how much they mean to you.. EVERY time you see them...and never EVER leave somebody hangin...always say goodbye...
Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to even write this? My whole body just starts shaking when I think about it...but I'm glad I did it...

Do you?...
Do you ever wonder what Adam is doing? Do you ever wonder why him? Do you ever wonder what really happened? Do you ever wonder what it's like to die? Do you ever wonder if god and heaven is really there? Do you ever wonder if Adam is as sad as we are? Do you ever wonder if you could've done something to stop it? Do you ever wonder why you didn't get to know him better? Do you ever wonder why it hurts so bad? Do you think about him every day?...Do you?...
I do...
..and do you know that Adam is truly our angel now?...

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Created: something 2000
Last Updated: April 8, 2001