I'm on anxiety med's, have tried therepy, I dunno! It usually doesn't affect every day life except every once in a while. Sometimes I just can't "talk myself Down"
2:16pmJim
does stress have anything to do with it
2:16pmBarbara
It just seems to be when I'm thinking about anniversaries, lioke when I'm really thinkinj aboiut Mom.
Stress has a lot to do with it
2:17pmJim
ahhh ok... I can see where that would effect you
2:17pmBarbara
Sorry, my typing is bad!
2:17pmJim
no worse than mine
2:17pmBarbara
It was this time three years ago that we were saying goodbye.
2:18pmBarbara
Bill, Shelly. Mike and I weren't seeings things the same way
2:19pmBarbara
It hasn't been good for our relationship, but it's probably my fault
2:19pmJim
those are tough times trying to deal with all the options etc
2:20pmBarbara
Bill,Shelly and I haven't talked since then
2:22pmJim
Yes I know that
2:25pmJim
went to Bills in april week after his birthday
Mike came up the following week for a couple of days
2:26pmBarbara
Bill in my opiion had been pretty selfish. He came down on Mom when she needed help. Said the onle time she ever called is when she needed something
2:27pmJim
then saw Shelly when she was in state in June
2:27pmBarbara
He offered her a place to stay only to tell her it would be too much of a burden on him
She stayed her with Brina and me for 5 months untill she was diagnoesed
2:29pmBarbara
He then offered tro be her executor untill he said in his words "that you are sole bennificiary on her life insurance so you deal woth it"
2:30pmBarbara
I should say she Brian.........see I told you my typing sucked!
2:31pmJim
I knew who you meant
2:31pmBarbara
I said I don't want the money you can have it.......i JUST WANT MY mOM BACK.
2:32pmJim
yup Moms are special people
2:32pmBarbara
Sorry, I shouldn't unload on you like this.
2:32pmJim
no problem
maybe it will ease your anxiety a little
2:34pmBarbara
Maybe, I dunno. If it wasn't for Mike and Brian/ I'd feel very alone..
I guess I just maybe need you to know another side of the story, not just Bill's duluted one.
2:36pmBarbara
All the therepy I've been in actually directs my anxieties to my relationship with Bill. Not with You, Mom or Dad.
2:36pmJim
Bill never said much about it, just that there were disagreements about everything
2:37pmBarbara
Disagreements because everything had to be Bill's way
I love Nick andAlley, but I don't care if I ever see him agian
Shelly either
they are both hypocrites in my book
2:40pmBarbara
Mom gave them everthing she had to give plus and they just thought it wasn't enough
2:42pmBarbara
Tell them that...they seemed to blame her for anything and everything that went wrong in there lives
she never gave them anything but a broken home in there opinion
2:44pmBarbara
I'm so sorry, I shouldn't be putting this on you
2:45pmJim
its ok. sometimes you need to vent
2:46pmBarbara
I just really miss my Mom
2:46pmJim
I still miss mine too and she passed in 1968
2:49pmJim
well kiddo I have a meeting at 3:30 so I better get going
2:49pmBarbara
ok have a good night sorry for being a flake
2:50pmJim
no problem...you were not a flake.
2:50pmBarbara
thanks for being nice
goodnight
2:51pmJim
your welcome...
goodnight ...and get your self better......
you know nothing of myself and your Moms relationship. you have none of her traits...no inner beauty no compassion.. she would never act mean, hateful and vicious like you do. the only person or thing that abandoned you is your common sense so dont try to tell me what i can say or do about Mary!