... I'm Neko, click me to follow your curser
Click me again to stop


Monstervision Movie Reviews and Host Segments, and 100% Wierd Listings for your viewing pleasure this month
Monstervision 1997 logo

Welcome to the Mostervision page.

FAQ (frequently asked question): What's the difference between Monstervision on TNT and Mystery Science Theater 3000 on the Sci-Fi channel?
Monster jokes "There are 3 types of people in the world - those who are good at math and those who aren't."

Past movies have included Star Trek 2: The Wrath Of Khan, all 3 Poltergeist movies (in a row, the same night), Back to the Future, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, Stephen King's The Dead Zone and Christine, and even a couple of films they also made fun of on MST3K...
Following the Monster Vision movie or movies was a film that TNT considers "100% Wierd". Sometimes it has something to do with the evening's selection (2 Godzilla movies were followed by "All Monsters Attack") and sometimes not. Sometimes "100% Wierd" was just a short film, Bigfoot: Man or Beast ... which is about 50% wierd. Or the classic Japanese TV-series Ultra 7, or Gilligan's Island, which is just plain silly. Each summer, Professor Joe Bob Briggs would conduct his own Summer School

These movies continue to run on TNT, TBS, and even the SYFY Channel in their original form. Simply print out the host segments for the movie when it comes around and read Joe Bob's comments on each segment as you watch the movie. It's the next best thing to having Joe Bob on the couch next to you...

Books by Joe Bob Briggs are available from his Amazon.com direct link

In addition to being Joe Bob Briggs on MonsterVision, John Bloom also appeared on Comedy Central's Daily Show to comment on Godstuff.
John Bloom's Godstuff page at Comedy Central. John Bloom does most or all of his own writing

MonsterVision movies transcripts list so far

                  On TV, Cable & Satellite (EST, subtract 3 hours for Pacific for some feeds)
1/18/15 Sunday
8am       Turnabout (1940, a bickering couple accidentally switch bodies)             Turner Classic Movies
5pm       Transformers                                                                TNT
5:30      Terminator 3                                                                American Movie Classics
5:45      The Bourne Identity                                                         TBS
6pm       Taken 2 (2012)                                                              FX
6pm       Batman Forever (1995)                                                       ION
6:35      Scary Movie 4                                                               Encore
6:35      Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch & the Wardrobe                    Starz
7:45 & 10pm  The Terminator (1984)                                                    Sundance
8pm       The Librarians (2 hour, new eps)                                            TNT
8pm       To Kill A Mockingbird (1962, Gregory Peck defends a black man accused of rape) Turner Classic Movies
8pm       X-Men (2000, first of the movie series, followed by X2 @ 10:30)             American Movie Classics
8pm       Die Hard (1988)                                                             Encore
8pm       Hot Fuzz (2007, in London)                                                  BBC America
8pm       Last Exorcism 2 (2013)                                                      Showtime 2
8pm       Fast & Furious (2009, Vin Diesel)                                           TBS
8pm       Sinister (2012)                                                             The Movie Channel
8:30      Batman & Robin (and Poison Ivy & Schwarzenegger & George Clooney & Batgirl) ION
8:30      Psycho (1998 remake)                                                        Showtime 2
9pm       Girls (new ep)                                                              HBO
9pm       Muppets Most Wanted (2014)                                                  Starz
9:30      Nat. Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (1989, Chevy Chase vs. squirrel)          IFC
10pm      Pacific Rim (2013, see plot of Battleship, Transformers, etc)               Cinemax
10:15     Duel In The Sun (1946, Jennifer Jones)                                      Turner Classic Movies
10:30     Hellboy (2004)                                                              BBC America
1/19/15 Monday
12pm      The World, The Flesh & the Devil (a woman, a racist & a black man survive WW3) Turner Classic Movies
5:45      Glory (1989, an all-black unit in the Civil War)                            Turner Classic Movies
6:30      Looper (2012, a time-traveling killer)                                      FX
6:30      The 5th Element (Bruce Willis)                                              SYFY channel
7:15      X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)                                                HBO
8pm       The Defiant Ones (escaped convicts, white & black, are chained together)    Turner Classic Movies
8pm       Gotham & Sleepy Hollow (new eps)                                            Fox
9pm       Raiders Of The Lost Ark (1981, back when Lucas and Spielberg made good movies) SYFY
9pm       Divergent (2014)                                                            HBO
10pm      Practical Magic (Sandra Bullock)                                            POP
11pm      Transporter (2002 thriller)                                                 IFC
1/20/15 Tuesday
11am      Operation Pacific (1951. John Wayne in a submarine)                         Turner Classic Movies
3pm       A Face In The Crowd (1957, Andy Griffith turns mean)                        Turner Classic Movies
6:25      Raiders Of The Lost Ark (Harrison Ford vs. a really big boulder, and snakes) SYFY
7pm       The Bourne Legacy (2012)                                                    FX
7:15      Basic Instinct (1992)                                                       Sundance
8pm       Marvel's Agent Carter                                                       ABC
8pm       The Flash & Supernatural (new eps)                                          CW
8pm       Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007 lame sequel)                American Movie Classics
8pm       The Wolverine (2013, in Japan)                                              Cinemax
8pm       After Earth (2013)                                                          Encore
8pm       Practical Magic (1998)                                                      POP
8:30      Runner Runner (2013)                                                        HBO
9pm       Interview With The Vampire (1994, in old New Orleans)                       Starz
9:40      Aliens (1986, Sigourney Weaver)                                             Encore
10:05     Snake Eyes (Nicolas Cage)                                                   The Movie Channel
11pm      Nat. Lampoon's Vacation (Chevy Chase, first of the movie series)            IFC
1:15am    The Great Gatsby (1974, Robert Redford)                                     Turner Classic Movies
5:30am    Day Is Done (1955, a bugler during the Korean War)                          Turner Classic Movies
1/21/15 Wednesday
6am       The Mad Genius (1931)                                                       Turner Classic Movies
11am      Doctor Who: Blink (don't turn your back on weeping angels)                  BBC America
11:15     The Boy From Oklahoma (1954, Will Rogers is elected sheriff)                Turner Classic Movies
4:15pm    Here We Go Again (Edgar Bergen, Fibber McGee & Molly)                       Turner Classic Movies
6:30      Divergent                                                                   HBO-2
6:30      Indiana Jones & the Temple of Doom (its ok, no crystal skulls in this one)  SYFY
6:45      Pacific Rim (2013, see plot of Godzilla, Transformers, etc)                 Cinemax
7pm       The Bourne Legacy (2012)                                                    FX
8pm       Arrow (new ep)                                                              CW
8pm       007 in Casino Royale (2006)                                                 American Movie Classics
8pm       Smokey & the Bandit (Burt Reynolds hauling illegal beer)                    CMT
8pm       Die Hard (1988, first of the movie series)                                  Encore
8pm       Kill Bill 1 & 2 (4 hour sequel to Pulp Fiction)                             Showtime 2
8pm       Star Trek Insurrection (1998)                                               The Movie Channel
8:30      G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra (2009)                                              Spike
9pm       The Cell (2000)                                                             Starz
9pm       Bruce Almighty (2003, Morgan Freeman as God)                                ABC Family
9pm       Hot Fuzz (2007, in London)                                                  BBC America
9pm       2 Guns (2013)                                                               HBO-2
9:07      Indiana Jones & the Last Crusade (1989, with Sean Connery)                  SYFY
9:50      Godzilla (2014)                                                             Cinemax
10pm      Nazi Mega Weapons (new ep looks at the SS)                                  PBS
10pm      American Horror Story Freak Show (new ep, last of season)                   FX
10pm      Volcano (1997, Tommy Lee Jones)                                             FXM
11pm      Dazed & Confused (1993, two potheads in 1976)                               IFC
12:45am   The Man In The Iron Mask (1939, rescued by the 3 Musketeers)                Turner Classic Movies
1/22/15 Thursday
8:15am    They Call It A Sin (1932, innocent chorus girl vs. the casting couch)       Turner Classic Movies
8:30      Galaxy Quest (1999, Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver)                            Comedy Central
Noon      Hellboy                                                                     FXM
2:30      The Green Hornet                                                            FXM
9:30      She Done Him Wrong (1933, not so innocent Mae West)                         Turner Classic Movies
6:30      Bruce Almighty (Morgan Freeman teaches Jim Carrey a lesson)                 ABC Family
7:35      Chicken Little (2005, animated)                                             Starz
8pm       Braveheart (1995)                                                           American Movie Classics
8pm       The Mexican (Brad Pitt, 2001)                                               Cinemax
8pm       The Vampire Dairies (new ep)                                                CW
8pm       Singing In The Rain (Gene Kelly, Debbie Reynolds, Donald O'Connor)          Turner Classic Movies
8pm       Elysium (2013)                                                              Encore
8pm       The Man With The Iron Fists (2012, China)                                   Spike
9pm       Chronicle of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe                   Starz
9pm       Gravity (2013)                                                              HBO-2
9:50      Unforgiven (Clint Eastwood)                                                 Encore
10pm      The Secret of My Success (Michael J. Fox)                                   POP
10pm      Indiana Jones (2008 sequel)                                                 SYFY
10:05     Blade Runner (rogue robots in 2019)                                         Cinemax
11pm      Vegas Vacation (1997, Chevy Chase)                                          IFC
11:45     The Mating Game (Debbie Reynolds, Tony Randall)                             Turner Classic Movies
1:30am    The Unsinkable Molly Brown (Debbie Reynolds on the Titanic)                 Turner Classic Movies
1/23/15 Friday
6am       The Oklahoma Kid (Bogart vs. James Cagney)                                  Turner Classic Movies
10am      Doctor Who: Voyage of the Damned (on the Titanic, in space)                 BBC America
Noon      The Green Hornet                                                            FXM
2:30      The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo                                             FXM
5:15      Nevada Smith (1966, Steve McQueen)                                          Turner Classic Movies
6pm       Dirty Dancing (Patrick Swayze)                                              ABC Family
7pm       Thor: The Dark World (2013)                                                 Starz
7:30 & 9:30  Enough (2002)                                                            Oxygen
8pm       Terminator: Salvation (2009)                                                American Movie Classics
8pm       Undercover Boss (new ep)                                                    CBS
8pm       The Fugitive (Harrison Ford vs. Tommy Lee Jones)                            CMT
8pm       Die Hard (1988, first of the movie series)                                  Encore
8pm       Immortals (2011)                                                            FX
8pm & 10pm  Enchanted (2007, a Disney princess is dumped into real world New York)    Bravo
8:30      Pineapple Express (2008)                                                    Comedy Central
9pm       Hellboy (2004)                                                              BBC America
9pm       Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014, with Samuel L Jackson)           Starz
9pm       12 Monkeys (new ep)                                                         SYFY
9pm       Mysteries At The Castle (new ep)                                            Travel channel
9pm       White Men Can't Jump (1992)                                                 VH1
9:30      Caddyshack (Chevy Chase, Bill Murray, Rodney Dangerfield)                   IFC
9:30      Fried Green Tomatoes (1990, Kathy Bates)                                    POP
10pm      Biloxi Blues (1988, Matthew Broderick as a WW2 soldier who's a virgin)      Turner Classic Movies
10pm      Dead Poets Society (Robin Williams)                                         The Movie Channel
10:30     Terminator 3                                                                American Movie Classics
12am      Seems Like Old Times (Chevy Chase, Goldie Hawn)                             Turner Classic Movies
2am       The Sunshine Boys (George Burns vs. Walter Matthau)                         Turner Classic Movies
1/24/15 Saturday
8:15am    Boom Town (1940, Clark Gable strikes oil)                                   Turner Classic Movies
12:15     The Poseidon Adventure (1972, Gene Hackman, Shelley Winters)                Turner Classic Movies
2:30      Patton (1970, George C. Scott as the WW2 General)                           Turner Classic Movies
5:30      The Spirit of St. Louis (1957, Jimmy Stewart as Lindbergh)                  Turner Classic Movies
6:30      Man Of Steel (2013)                                                         Cinemax
6:30      The Dark Knight (2008)                                                      TNT
6:40      Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)                                  Starz
7pm       Grease (John Travolta, Olivia Newton John)                                  ABC Family
7pm       Fried Green Tomatoes (1990, Kathy Bates)                                    POP
7:30      Scary Movie 5 (2013)                                                        Showtime 2
8pm       Assault on Precinct 13 (2005 remake)                                        American Movie Classics
8pm       Coal Miner's Daughter (1980, Sissy Spacek, Tommy Lee Jones)                 Turner Classic Movies
8pm       Mirror Mirror (2012 fantasy)                                                ABC
8pm       Pineapple Express (2008)                                                    Comedy Central
8pm       50 First Dates (2004, a girl with no memory)                                Encore
8pm       300: Rise of an Empire (2014)                                               HBO
9pm       Mythbusters (new ep)                                                        Discovery channel
9pm       Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl (here there be monsters) FXX
9pm       Black Sails (new ep)                                                        Starz
9:30      Grease 2 (lame sequel with different cast)                                  ABC Family
10pm      Austin Powers (Mike Myers)                                                  WGN America
1am       The Perils of Pauline (1947, Betty Hutton as a B-movie actress)             Turner Classic Movies
2:45      Vigilante (1983, they killed his son)                                       Turner Classic Movies
1/25/15 Sunday
2pm       The Harvey Girls (1946, Judy Garland in the old West)                       Turner Classic Movies
5:15      Hot Tub Time Machine (comedy)                                               Comedy Central
5:25      16 Blocks                                                                   HBO
6:10      Dave                                                                        Encore
6:15      Forbidden Planet (1956, an invisible monster vs. a space patrol)            Turner Classic Movies
6:10      Riddick (2013, Vin Diesel)                                                  Cinemax
6:15      Flightplan                                                                  Starz
6:30      First Blood (Stallone, first of the movie series, followed by sequel Rambo 2) American Movie Classics
7:15      300: Rise of an Empire (2014)                                               HBO
7:30      Training Day (2001)                                                         Spike
7:30 & 10pm Ted (a man's boyhood teddy bear comes to life)                            FXX
8pm       Undercover Boss (new ep)                                                    CBS
8pm       Simpsons (new ep)                                                           Fox
8pm       Trapeze (1956, Tony Curtis, Gina Lollabrigida)                              Turner Classic Movies
8pm       Saving Mr. Banks (2013, Tom Hanks as Walt Disney)                           Encore
8pm       The Bourne Legacy (2012)                                                    FX
8:10      Percy Jackson: Sea Of Monsters (2013)                                       Cinemax
9pm       Sons Of Liberty (new ep)                                                    History Channel
9pm       Enemy At The Gates (dueling snipers in the WW2 battle for Stalingrad, 2001) IFC
9pm       The Crazies (2010)                                                          SYFY
10pm      Godzilla (2014)                                                             Cinemax
10pm      Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)                                  Starz
10:30     Rambo 3                                                                     American Movie Classics
12am      Rambo 4 (2008)                                                              IFC
                                               This month, January 2015

January 1, New Year's Day. Kwanzaa is over
1/1/42 born Country Joe McDonald, singer & Vietnam War protester
1/1/44 US Strategic Air Forces in Europe activated 
1/1/62 The Beatles audition for Decca Records in London but Decca decides to sign another group instead, the Tremeloes
1/1/80 Keith Richards awarded MBE by Queen of England. A singer since 1957 with 22 hits in England, his 
       biggest in America were Devil Woman (1976) and We Don't Talk Anymore (1979)
1/1/1986 Milwaukee Road merged into the Soo Line railroad
1/1/1983 Sultanate of Brunei independence
1/1/2015 Mario Cuomo died (82) former governor of New York
1/2/2014 film producer Bernard Glasser died (89) Return of the Fly, Day of the Triffids
1/3/1971 8000-year-old cave paintings discovered in Egypt
1/3/2014 Phil Everly died (74) singer with the Everly Brothers
1/3/66 Experimental B-70 bomber hit 2000 mph for 3 minutes
1/3/64 The Jack Paar Show plays a video clip of The Beatles, predating their 1st live US appearance by a month
1/3/45 born Stephen Stills singer
1/4/15 Full Moon, werewolf threat high - lock Larry Talbut in his room
1/4/41 Maureen Reagan born on Jane Wyman's 27th birthday
1/4/42 born John McLaughlin, singer
1/4/57 Military Air Transport Service brings 10,000 refugees to US
1/4/54 Truck driver Elvis Presley meets Sam Phillips & records a 2-sided demo record in Memphis
1/4/65 President Johnson tells a joint session of Congress of his Great Society plans to ends all poverty
1/4/65 author and critic T.S. Eliot died (76)
1/5/23 born Sam Phillips, record producer who met truck driver Elvis Presley in 1954
1/5/75 The Wiz, a soul-music version of The Wizard Of Oz, opens on Broadway
1/5/79 Briefcase Full of Blues by the Blues Brothers (Dan Aykroyd & John Belushi) inc. the song
       Soul Man goes platinum, reviving sales of the original version by Sam & Dave
1/6/1893 Great Northern Railway drives its last spike at Scenic, WASH
1/6/2014 Miss Venezuela 2004/actress Monica Spear (29) shot to death with her husband on a highway in Venezuela
1/6/57 Elvis Presley sings seven songs in 20 minutes on the Ed Sullivan Show
1/7/29 "Question Mark", a Fokker C-2, flies a refueled record 150 hours 45 minutes without landing
1/7/48 born Kenny Loggins, singer "Sittin' In"
1/7/82 The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra gets a platinum record in America for "Hooked On Classics,"
       a blend of 18th, 19th and early 20th century music to a disco beat
1/8/33 Ronald Reagan gets 1st job as radio announcer, Davenport, Iowa
1/8/35 born Elvis Presley (died 8/16/77) gold records for rock, gospel and Christmas music
1/8/41 "Little Anthony" Gourdine born, 1950s singer
1/8/57 Elvis Presley passes the Army pre-induction exam
1/8/64 Air Force Cross awarded posthumously to Maj. Rudolf Anderson Jr., shot down during 1962 
       Cuban Missile Crisis
1/8/47 David Bowie born, dropped real last name Jones to avoid confusion with actor Davy Jones of The Monkees
1/9/15 born Les Paul, record holder for shortest song ever released, 2 notes long, as "Magic Melody, Part 2"
1/9/44 born Jimmy Page, singer and a founding member of Led Zeppelin
1/9/1960 Egypt begins Aswan High Dam on the Nile, floods 22 archeological sites by 1970, some of which were relocated
1/9/1979 Hillary Clinton (67) begins political career as First Lady of Arkansas with husband Gov. Bill Clinton
1/10/1863 London Underground opens, of no strategic importance to the Great Intelligence
1/10/43 born Jim Croce singer (died 9/20/73, just 1 year after his 1st hit) Time In A Bottle went gold in 1973
1/10/45 born Rod Stewart singer
1/10/46 Army sets world helicopter high altitude record, 21,000 feet
1/10/81 Pirates Of Penzance, the only operetta written specifically for America by Gilbert & Sullivan, reopens
 on Broadway starring pop singers Linda Ronstadt & Rex Smith, who later reprise their roles for a movie version
1/11/2014 Jophery Brown died (68) stuntman in Die Hard, Predator, Oblivion
1/11/2014 Jerome Willis died (85) actor in Doctor Who (1973) and Space Precinct TV-series as Capt. Podley
1/12/62 USAF begins spraying defoliants inc. Agent Orange over Vietnam in Operation Ranch Hand
1/12/63 Bob Dylan records a play for BBC Radio as a hobo, including a song never released on a record
1/13/65 President Johnson submits legislation to Congress to fix immigration policy
1/13/42 Army Air Force test flies its 1st helicopter, the XR-4
1/13/79 Donny Hathaway (34) fell or jumped from 15th floor hotel room, sang themesong for TV-series "Maude"
He had been attempting a comeback by singing duets with Roberta Flack but suffered from psychological problems
1/14/66 David Bowie releases his 1st single since dropping his last name Jones
1/15/2014 John Dobson died (98) American astronomer
1/15/1919 In Boston, 21 people drowned in a 30 foot high wave of molasses when its tank burst
1/16/2014 Harvey Bernhard died (89) producer The Goonies, The Omen, The Lost Boys
1/16/2014 Russell Johnson died (89) actor Gilligan's Island as The Professor
1/16/2014 Dave Madden died (82) actor The Partridge Family, Laugh-In, and radio series Adventure in Odyssey
1/16/2014 Hal Sutherland died (84) animator Star Trek The Animated Series (1974), cofounder of Filmation
1/16/1756 French and Indian War turns into the Seven Years War between Britain & France
1/16/1868 William Davis patents the refrigerator car to ship perishables by railroad
1/16/57 The Cavern Club opens in a former wine cellar in Liverpool, England
1/16/72 David Sevile (Ross Bagdasarian) died, creator & voice of The Chipmunks and Witch Doctor novelty records
1/17/1871 The cable car patented, and still going in San Francisco
1/17/1957 BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) formed in San Francisco
1/17/74 Singer Dino Martin, son of Dean Martin, arrested for selling an AK47 machine gun to an undercover cop
1/17/82 Song writer Tommy Tucker (48) is overcome by fumes & found dead, refinishing floors in his home
1/17/91 Gulf War starts with F-117A stealth fighters and B-52 bombers at night
1/18/41 born Bobby Goldsboro, one of opening acts for Rolling Stones in 1964
1/18/57 Three B-52s make world's 1st nonstop jet flight around the world
1/18/82 L.A. Mayor Bradley declares Bob & Doug McKenzie Day in honor of the comic SCTV characters
1/19/15   Martin Luther King Jr. birthday (observed the 3rd Monday of January)  
1/19/1910 First bomb run by an airplane, using 3 two-pound sand bags
1/19/39 born Phil Everly, singer with his brother Don, "Wake Up Little Suzie," smashed his guitar onstage when Don quit
1/19/43 born Janis Joplin singer (died 10/4/70) Ball & Chain
1/19/49 born Robert Palmer, singer with Genesis before he and Phil Collins went solo
1/19/46 born Dolly Parton, singer/actress "9 to 5"
1/20/15 New Moon, werewolf threat level green
1/20/1889 born Leadbelly (Huddie Ledbetter, died 12/6/49) singer "Goodnight Irene"
1/20/65 Alan Freed (42), the top ten DJ destroyed by the payola scandal hearings, dies of uremia
1/21/41 born Richie Havens, singer
1/21/59 Civil War folksong "Tom Dooley" becomes a gold record for the Kingston Trio, their 1st
1/21/66 George Harrison marries model Patti Boyd, for whom Eric Clapton later wrote "Layla"
1/21/82 Blues guitarist B.B. King donates his 7,000 rare records collection dating back 40 years
        to the University of Mississippi
1/22/35 born Sam Cooke (died 12/11/64) singer equally popular on R&B and Pop charts "You Send Me"
1/22/59 USAF determines that less than 1% of UFO sightings are of unknown origin in report later known as
        Operation Bluebook
1/22/66 These Boots Are Made For Walkin' by Nancy Sinatra hits the Top 100 pop chart, and eventually #1
1/23/73 Philadelphia radio station WMMR plays 12 minute of bells tolling to observe the Vietnam War cease-fire
1/23/58 A junta overthrew Venezuelan president Marcos Perez Jimenez
1/24/41 Neil Diamond born singer
1/24/65 Winston Churchill died (90) served 6 monarchs from Queen Victoria to her great-great-granddaughter Elizabeth II
1/24/78 "Short People" by Randy Newman goes gold, his musical spoof of prejudice
1/24/2014 Lisa Daniely (83) actress The Invisible Man (1958 TV-series), Doctor Who
1/25/1955 British Railways announce plan to abandon steam engines
1/25/71 Charles Manson and 3 female followers convicted of murdering Sharon Tate and 6 others in 1969
1/25/76 An all-star Houston rock concert to benefit hurricane victims produces no net proceeds after expenses
1/25/90 The SR-71 "spy planes" retired by Strategic Air Command, replaced by satellites in orbit
1/26/40 Ronald Reagan marries Jane Wyman
1/26/57 Last P-51 fighter plane retired from service, donated to Air Force Museum
1/26/57 Eddie Van Halen born, called "the 1st guitar hero of the Eighties" by David Lee Roth
1/26/81 Autoamerican album by Blondie goes platinum, inc. singles The Tide Is High and Rapture,
        introducing reggae & vamp rap to the Top 100
1/27/67 Apollo 1 catches fire inside capsule on launchpad, killing all 3 astronauts
1/27/65 Premier Hassan Ali Mansour of Iran assassinated
1/27/58 Singer Little Richard enrolls in college after finding God when his plane caught fire over the Philippines
1/27/2014 Ann Carter (77) child actess Curse Of The Cat People (1944)
1/28/1945 The 8th Air Force launches 1000 plane raid on Nazi Germany
1/29/58 Instrumental "Tequila" by Jim Seals & Dash Crofts, as The Champs, released
1/29/79 A San Diego teenager shoots up her high school, killing 2, saying only "I don't like Mondays."
        It is immortalized in song by the Boomtown Rats
1/29/2014 Col. Meow died (2) Guinness World Record holder for cat with the longest fur, a Himalayan/Persian
1/30/2014 Arthur Rankin Jr. died 89 director/writer/producer, Rankin-Bass Productions holiday childrens TV specials,
          animated movie The Hobbit (1977), The Mad Monster Party, The Wind in the Willows (1987)
1/30/69 The Beatles last appearance, on the rooftop of Apple Studios playing for the movie Let It Be, 
        is cut short by police due to complaints of the noise by neighbors
1/30/73 KISS plays its 1st live concert, though Paul Stanley says that 1st makeup looked more like New York Dolls
1/30/82 I Can't Go For That by Hall and Oates hits #1 on the Disco, Pop and R&B charts, only
        the 4th record by white singers to hit #1 on the R&B chart since 1965
1/31/35 Union Pacific's M-10000 enters service as City of Salina, a 3-car V-12 diesel powered train
1/31/51 Phil Collins born, his Genesis began in 1972
1/31/58 1st US satellite launched, Explorer 1 on an Army Jupiter C rocket
1/31/81 "Sukiyaki" the only Japanese song to hit #1 in America (1963) hits #1 again, this time by
        female duo A Taste Of Honey
1/31/56 born John Lydon, singer (known as Johnny Rotten when he was with The Sex Pistols)
1/31/65 New York Welfare Dept. workers vote to end a 28-day strike
February 1 National Freedom Day
2/1/59 Ballistic Missile Early Warning System becomes operational 
2/1/39 born Don Everly, singer with brother as The Everly Brothers until he announced onstage that he was quitting
2/1/52 born Rick James, singer
2/1/53 Holland's famous earthen dikes breached by storm surge, 1800 people drowned, newer dikes never breached
       again, and hundreds more drowned in southern England along the Thames
2/1/2014 actor Maximilian Schell died (83) MST3000 ep Hamlet (1962), Diary of Anne Frank (1980) Disney's The Black Hole (1979)
2/2    It's Groundhog Day, just ask Bill Murray
2/2/55 Petula Clark has her 1st hit record in UK, but won't catch on in America for a decade
The Wizard Of Oz in 5 minutes

As reviewed by a guy stuck in space with two robots named Crow and Tom Servo
Monstervision's Joe Bob Briggs started on The Movie Channel: TMC schedule
"While other people come upon roadkill and see a dead animal, I see a new hat" Beth Beverly, Taxidermist
Half of the DNA in humans and bananas is the same, does that mean we are all half bananas?

Ray Harryhausen's legendary stop-motion creatures defined blockbuster special effects for decades and inspired entire generations of filmmakers. He died May 7th, 2013 at the age of 92.
Other deaths in 2013 included Tom Laughlin, star of the Bill Jack movies, and Peter O'Toole, costar of Supergirl and "My Favorite Year."

Note: Joe Bob's video host segments for "Blood Feast" have been added to the Blood & Donuts page cause I can't remember where I put the transcript for Blood Feast
"Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff" Frank Zappa
Click here for the planet Alderran from the 1st Star Wars movie. The Shadow Knows
Peter Graves of Mission Impossible (TV-series) and the movie Airplane, has died. His son tried to help but to no avail. Walter Koenig's son Andrew, a childstar on "Growing Pains" as Boner, has been found dead of suicide. Members of the cast of Star Trek and Growing Pains have sent their sympathy to the family; he had been treated for depression and went off his meds. Walter Koenig asks that anyone wrestling with depression please get help or call someone

Josh Friedman (the Terminator TV series) is casting for a new Charlie's Angels TV-series on ABC and Moonlight's Alex O'Loughlin is close to an agreement to play the Jack Lord role in a new Hawaii 5-0. NBC has ordered several new pilots to fill the hole in primetime left by Jay Leno returning to the Tonight Show, including a new Rockford Files by the creator of TV's House, and a dramedy starring David Tennant (Who?) called "Rex Is Not Your Lawyer" (I hope that's just a working title). American Movie Classics is adapting "The Walking Dead" zombie comic book for a new TV-series on the cable channel known for Mad Men and Breaking Bad. Starz is already running episodes of Sam Raimi's "Spartacus: Blood & Sand," with Lucy Lawless (Xena) as a Roman vamp. Remember Terry O'Quinn from the Monstervision feature Stepfather 2? He's no longer Mr. Nice Guy on the TV-series "Lost." He told TV Guide in January 2010 that in the 6th & final season, his character's "on a mission and he's a dark presence, almost like the devil. The more the others know about him, the more fear he inspires."
Hey, are you kids watching Play-Mate Of The Apes?
There are former MonsterVision movies on the following entire-month channel's pages. Whenever possible, I have made the movie titles on these pages MonsterVision review/host segments links:
American Movie Classics ... Turner Classic Movies ... A&E ... History Channel ... Independent Film Channel ... Encore ... Starz ... Starz in Black ... Starz Edge ... Starz Comedy ... Encore's Mystery ... Drama and Action Channels and Wam ... HBO & Cinemax ... Showtime ... Showtime's Flix Channel ... The Movie Channel ... Showtime's Family Zone and Sundance ... Showtime #2 (Showtime Too), Showtime Showcase, Showtime Extreme, Showtime Beyond, Showtime Women ... Showtime Next. Showtime HD appears to be the same as Showtime ... Starz Cinema ... Starz HDTV ... Encore Westerns ... MoviePlex ... RetroPlex ... Starz Kids & Family and Encore's Love Channel ... SciFi Channel movies & TV-marathons ... USA Network movies. Bravo!
Fox Movie Channel no longer has monthly listings, just a non-text daily list on their flash website
See Dinner & A Movie page for upcoming TBS Dinner & A Movie (Fridays), Movie & A Makeover (Saturdays), TBS Movie Extra (Thursdays & Sundays)

Note: Star Trek The Next Generation is on the SYFY channel as well as WGN weeknights @ 10pm/1am EST. A and E has The Sopranos @ 2pm Mon-Fri, and Family Channel has 2 eps of Sabrina The Teenage Witch @ 2pm Mon-Fri

Zombieland full-length trailer #2

There are no zombies in Washington DC because they eat brains

I don't care what you've heard, most of Air America Radio's programs are still on the air

In August 2009, Nancy Pelosi said that people opposed to the government health care plan are un-American Nazis, then she sent her flying monkeys to find Dorothy in Oz.

Watch Dracula and his Vampire Brides in its entirety courtesy of YouTube, starring Christopher Lee for Hammer Films
Note: The SciFi Channel is changing its name to SYFY, don't ask me why why. Maybe it goes better with professional wrestling
ABC has the TV rights to "The Witches Of Eastwick" and has turned it into a TV-series similar to Desperate Housewives titled simply "Eastwick." Tom Cruise has agreed to do Mission Impossible 4 as producer, but possibly not star in it in 2011. Click here to please Zardoz.

He's Always Russian Around

Alright, some of you turkeys still don't know what "Bimbo" means. Maybe this video will help

What's Russian for Zsa Zsa?

Have you ever been talking on the phone and forgot somebody's name? Perhaps it would help to have your brain indexed. Google announced a new service on April 1st called Brainsearch which will allow Google to search your brain for you anytime you want to remember something. It is available only for cell-phone users at this time because it uses Beta waves:

John Wayne's opinion of gun control
Website Sizzler, including free ebook: How To Generate Quick Cash In An Emergency

Four U.S. helicopters crossed into Syria on 10-27-08 to blast a terrorist camp there. The leading helicopter was flown by a shirtless guy named Rambo, wearing boxing shorts

If the number seven is lucky than I guess it must really be lucky when the stock market drops 777 points in one day...it dropped 18% in one week, a higher percentage than it did on Black Monday 10-28-29, brother can you spare a dime?
A penny a day for a month, doubled, would be 1 cent times 30 days times two, or 60 cents! Here's a 31-day list of how much you would make if it doubled every day for 31 days

Want Monstervision episodes on DVD? Here's a fansite that appears to trade DVDs amongst its member for just the cost of postage: Latenightwingman.com

Make your own banners completely free of charge at IntantBannerCreator.com

Previous MonsterVision listings here (in 2010)

Review Me

Monstervision's 100% Weird

A full-color recreation of Joe Bob's Saturday Night homepage (1999/2000) is now viewable. The links all work now, I think.
BBC will stop playing April Fools Day pranks when penguins fly

Yes, that's Terry Jones of Monty Python as the host, 2008
How it was created

Of course, April is also the month of the annual Spaghetti Harvest

Did you forget to send an important email? Google now has a Gmail feature that allows you to send email as far back in time as April 1, 2004. Gmail utilizes an e-flux capacitor to resolve issues of causality. Click here for details. Posted by Google on April 1. The 1st day of April.

Check out the new ad for Indiana Jones 4 (2008)

MST3K is Back!   - RiffTrax

More weird videos posted at the Ripley's Believe It Or Not pages

1980s eps of Knight Rider have moved to MyRTN: Retro Television Network, available in 40 states so far

Click Here if you don't know what "Click Here" means
Click here if you think your job sucks. What's up, Tiger Lily?

MonsterVision Bios of Joe Bob and Honey the Mail Girl. And of course, Professor Joe Bob also has his own Q&A page

Joe Bob Briggs interview (January 2006) page 1, page 2...Interview with Mike Nelson of MST3000

----------------->>> The Mean Kitty Song <<<-------------------

The budget for Spider-Man 3 was around $350,000,000 making it one of the most expensive movies ever made. Not to be confused with the low-budget Lon Chaney, Jr. monster movie Spider Baby (1964, with the opening credits music narrated by Chaney himself)
Faster, Pussycat, Kill, Kill! (the lost scene)

Ed Wood (with Martin Landau as Bela Lugosi, as he was filming Plan 9 from Outer Space) is seen occasionally on AMC's sister station, Independent Film Channel

Joe Bob Briggs interview from November 2006 is now archived online

You've heard about it, check it out for yourself. The George Orwell spoof: Why 2008 won't be like 1984 put together by a fan of Obama

Clip posted at YouTube: Bob Denver intros Mysterious Island for TNT's MonsterVision

If this link doesn't work it's not my fault (no pathetic excuses)

Would you like to have Joe Bob speak at
your next meeting or corporate event?
Fill out this form, so that he can get back
to you with all the exciting details!

Aslan Take them The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe theatrical trailers swiped from
have been moved to the new
Chronicles of Narnia movie page
Aslan is on the move. Sequels coming soon

Check out Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 & 3 or the Flying Dutchman may get you with its kracken

Golden Age of Radio online including The Shadow and Doc Savage

Happy Halloween from Dr. Loomis
Webmasters, feel free to link to this entire page - http://www.Monstervision.org
There will never be popups or popunders here, though I do enjoy a good apple popover now and then if its cooked right

Remember, it's just Five Million Years To Earth

If you see any problems with this website, you'll have to check with the Dungeonmaster. The webmaster is taking a nap
Now available from Amazon.com Joe Bob Briggs narrates "A Double Dose of Joe Bob Briggs: "The Double-D Avenger" and "Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter" You can buy it at Joe Bob's new official site www.joebobbriggs.com and he'll even autograph it for you.

MonsterVision Rating System
G ..... General Audiences, all ages allowed
PG.... Profanity Guaranteed, all ages allowed
R ..... Restricted, no one under 17 allowed unless they like looking at nekkid chicks or bloody violence and can talk the babysitter into pretending to be their parent to get them in. Unless of course she's a psycho Sitter
NC17... No children under 17, cause this movie has X-rated sex or violence that Hollywood doesn't want to call X-rated anymore. The British & Germans have a number-based ratings system, and the French use one based on bleu cheese

Joe Bob Briggs bio from 1999 (he blooms anywhere)
There are books by Joe Bob Briggs available on the bio page, but none about Monstervision

Joe Bob's unlisted phone numberClick here for Joe Bob's secret home phone number

This vast website devoted to Monstervision built and maintained by half-vast fans

Best movies ever made by Japanese guys in monster suits...with links to Monstervision's host segments for "Godzilla" and "Godzilla vs Mothra" (Joe Bob just loved the tiny women who sing to Mothra)

A word from God

Big Trouble In Little China fans, for a free computer game based on your favorite movie, go to the Big Trouble In Little China computer game on the Wingkong.net fan website for free download. And don't worry if you don't get the rules right away, you weren't brought into this world to get it, Mr. Burton.
And here's Kurt Russell's opinion of Osama Bin Ladin.
Email: scifans@gmail

Click here to sign up for a weekly Email from Joe Bob, news you can't use, guaranteed. Want to drop Joe Bob a note? Send email to joebob@joebobbriggs.com

Longer version of that music the Phantom plays on a pipe organ

Click here for Christine (the movie review & host segments, not the demon-possessed car from Hell itself)

Or visit Boris Karloff, he's lonely

Kolchak, the Night Stalker page

Lock your doors, lock your windows, and click here for the "Halloween" movies

Halloween is 20 years old, happy birthday!

Animated graphics © 2003 by The Animation Factory.

Be vewy vewy qwiet. I'm hunting wabbits. Bad, bad talking-cat

® Monstervision is a registered trademark of nobody

This electric site
Help keep this on a popup-free website. Buy something from our sponsors!
Click here to hear your computer scream again

Or here for Return of the Living Dead

Please note: this website is for intelligent people, not this guy
Was that the boogie-man?

Guess who's coming to dinner

Welcome to the party, pal

Monstervision Error 404 Page (it's fun)

See anything on this page you don't like? Contact the Webmaster. Not to be confused with the Puppet Master. Whatever you do, for God's sake, don't attempt to contact the zombie/undead "Puppet Master." You've been warned. That's all I can do.

Episodes of Wierd Science can be seen on Starz channel "Wam" What do you little maniacs want to do first?

The Visitors are coming to the Sci-Fi Channel in a remake of "V" with Robert Englund of Nightmare On Elm Street as a "friendly" alien

Greetings from The Visitors

Hamster Dance!

Or visit the Neko homepage

Click here if you want to be a spammer

Note: if you want to printout this page, be sure your printer is set to black ink & no background. And that it has ink in it. And paper


What was the question again?

42% of all statistics are fake

10 Reasons Not To Kill George Bush

Your uncle was a monkey, swinging through the trees
Or don't you believe in Human origins?

Willard! There are rats in the basement!

"The majority is always wrong" - Steve McQueen
Terrorists are not cowards, they're the enemy...Annihilate them
Joe Bob Briggs

They're creepy and they're kooky, mysterious and ookie, they're altogether spooky, the Addams Family.

It's A Joke, Son (256k video mp4)

Important Note: This is not a chain letter. It was not started decades ago in the Netherlands, nor was it perpetrated centuries ago by some deranged monk on Easter Island (which is highly unlikely in the first place, since EMACS only works on smart display terminals, and they weren't available on Easter Island back then, due largely to the U.S. state department's vigorous ban on exportation of advanced technology to deranged monks on equatorial islands).

There is no luck associated with this letter. Hence, it is pointless to send five copies of this letter to people you like. In fact, it is vigorously discouraged, since, by sending this letter through the postal service, you are needlessly burdening an already overworked system. You also increase the chance of the postal service losing mail. Murphy's Law will take effect here, resulting in your letter being delivered the next day, and a Red Cross package to a needy individual in Zimbabwe to be accidentally re-routed to Hackensack, New Jersey, thus becoming lost forever. You do not stand a chance, however, of displacing any junk mail.

If you break the chain, and fail to send five copies of this letter to other unfortunate individuals, then absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen to you. If, on the other hand, you do propagate five copies of this letter, then absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen to you, either.

"The Freaks" start doing the gooble gobble chant at a wedding reception (1932). By the way, this movie was banned in Britain for 30 years, and even the ending was edited out before it was released in America, and the ending on the storyboard wasn't approved for filming (it involved an ax and a bag of feathers)

People who think logically are a nice contrast to the rest of the world
Nine of ten people suffer from hemorrhoids. Do the others enjoy them?

"If you'll make the toast and pour the juice, Sweetheart," said the newlywed bride, "breakfast will be ready."
"Good, what are we having for breakfast?" asked the new husband.
"Toast and juice," she replied.

The drive-in will never die!!!

"MonsterVision" was cancelled by the ungrateful weasels at TNT
Later gator,
Joe Bob

"Don't believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose." Douglas Adams (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

More Blonde Jokes:
She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
She thought a quarterback was a refund.
She tripped over the cordless phone.
She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to makeup her mind.
She told someone to meet her at the corner of WALK and DON'T WALK.
She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
At the bottom of the application where it says "sign here," she put "Sagittarius."
If she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
When she heard that 90% of all crimes happened around the home, she moved.
Did you hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? ...It took her months to figure out she could use it at night.
What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA? ..."Look! They spelled MACY'S wrong!"
Why did the blonde stare at the frozen orange juice? ...Because it said "concentrate."
Why can't blondes take coffee breaks? They're too hard to retrain.
What do you call 9 blondes standing in a circle? A dope ring.
Why can't blondes be pharmacists? Because they can't fit the bottle in the typewriter.
What's the definition of eternity? 4 blondes at a 4-way stop.
What do you call five blondes at the bottom of the ocean? An air pocket.
What do you call a basement full of blondes? A whine cellar.
Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts? "This Goes In Front."
What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios? "Oh, look!! Donut seeds!
"When I went to Wal-Mart for the first time...I always thought they sold wallpaper. I didn't realize it was everything. You can get anything you want there for really, really cheap." Paris Hilton

Many more blonde jokes

The latest blond joke is in the Miss Teenage America contest from someplace on the maps known as Carolina (not near Asian countries or the Iraq) and all of you U.S. Americans can see it here

What's the difference between Congress and a clown college? Some people still respect clowns

Heroes of 9/11 and 3000 Names

This page © the great and powerful Bill Laidlaw. Coca Cola has been 100% cocaine-free since 1929

In February 2008 two thieves with knives invaded the north Texas home of 80 year old James Pickett but he got so mad when one of them said something bad about John Wayne he put them both in the hospital with cracked heads. Them's fightin' words!

Legal crap for this world wide website

Happy New Year from my cat
Fun fact: As of 1995, Yahoo.com had a indexed over 15,000 websites!

Some graphics on this page are from the Angelfire Graphics Library...That's the fact, Jack

Need a program to process windows media audio? Freeware available at this fansite (WMA, WMV and ASF)

Remember, a bird in the bush is worth half a bird in your hand, a word is worth one-thousandth of a picture, and the early worm gets eaten by a bird. That's my 2˝˘ worth

Can't find any hosted bad movies to watch? How about hosted bad movie trailers...check out the website Trailersfromhell.com, they appear to have a different hosted bad movie trailer 3 days a week. After you hear the hosted version, click un-narrated version to hear the trailer's original audio, in all it's glory!

Playboy Magazine has a new edition for married people, the centerfold is the same every month
What has four legs and an arm? A pit bull.
What has four legs and an ear? Mike Tyson's pit bull.
What do you say to a one-legged hitchhiker? "Hop in." The Drive-In will never die!

The use of solar energy has not been opened up because the oil industry does not own the sun
Ralph Nader (1980)
Sometimes it's hard to get a Taxi

Save the Sea Kittens
Is government a necessary evil or just plain evil?
"The nincompoops in my audience greatly outnumber the compoops"
Brother Theodore Gottlieb (1996) David Letterman Show
The chief characteristic of institutions is that if they have a purpose when they are started, it is forgotten as they mature"
Robert M. Hutchins
If everyone is thinking alike, then nobody is thinking
Fun with audio:
If you say "Thank you Satan" into your computer and play it backwards, it sounds like "Yes We Can"
eXTReMe Tracker