~ Michaela's Poem Page ~
I will see you through
I know it was not easy,
for you to let her go,
but love like yours would not hold back,
your love to suffer so.
And so I took her quickly,
so she would never know,
a lengthy time of darkness,
that would distress her so.
I left her body here awhile,
so you could have some time,
to be prepared to let her go,
she was already Mine.
I bid her come while happy,
with joyous plans ahead,
and laughter in her face and heart,
and not one thought of dread.
You have the most to suffer,
your loneliness to bear,
but know that she is safe with Me,
within My loving care.
And never doubt My love for you,
I know you wonder why,
just know My strength will be your joy,
My love will never die.
I bore my son's own suffering,
and I will bear yours too,
give me your doubts and pain and hurt
and I will see you through.
Love me enough to let go
Your hearts are breaking-I know: I can tell
Because you're my parents and I know you so well
As hard as this is,
there's something I need to say
I don't want to linger,
don't beg me to stay
Keeping me here only gets in my way
Prevents me from being where I want to be
Out of this body and finally pain free
Living with God is my ultimate goal
By taking me home He is making me whole,
The only thing holding me back, Mom and Dad,
Is thinking of you and the good times we had.
You fought for me when no one else could,
Refused to give up when others told you you should
You packed a whole lifetime of love in (two) years
Gave me strength to handle all of my fears
Showered me with courage-you said-"It's a loan"
While secretly hiding tears of your own
You've done everything I needed-
I couldn't ask for much more
Please love me enough-
to help me pass through that door
I know you are sad-and it doesn't seem fair
But the time has come to put me in God's care
Since I started the job I was sent here to do
And planted a seed now residing in you
I'm sure I can trust you to carry my load
Please love me enough- enough to let go
~Kathy McElhinny 1998
Special Angel in Heaven
There's a special Angel in Heaven
that is a part of me.
It is not where I wanted her
but where God wanted her to be.
She was here but just a moment
like a nightime shooting star.
And though she is in Heaven
she isn't very far.
She touched the heart of many
like only an Angel can do.
We held her every minute
for the end we all knew.
So I send this special message
to the Heaven up above.
Please take care of my Angel
and send her all my love.
What Makes a MotherBR>(adapted for Michaela)
I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother
And I know I heard him say.
A Mother has a baby
This we know is true.
But, God can you be a Mother
When your baby's not with you?
Yes, you can He replied
With confidence in His voice
"I give many women babies
When they leave is not their choice.
Some I send some for a lifetime
And others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb
But there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this, God
I want my baby here
He took a breath and cleared His throat
And then I saw a tear.
I wish that I could show you
What your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile
With other children and say
"We go to earth to learn our lessons
Of love and life and fear.
My Mommy loved me oh so much
I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a Mom
Who had so much love for me
I learned my lesson very quickly
My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much
but I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep
On her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek
And whisper in her ear.
"Mommy, don't be sad today
I'm your baby and I'm here."
So you see my dear sweet one
Your child is okay
Your baby is here in My home
And this is were she'll stay.
She'll wait for you with Me
Until your lesson is through.
And on the day that you come home
She'll be at the gates for you.
So now you see what makes a Mother
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start.
Though some on earth
may not realize your a Mother,
Until their time is done.
They'll be up here with Me one day
And know you're the best one!
If we could have a lifetime wish,
One dream that would come true,
We'd pray to God with all our hearts
For yesterday and you.
Now we think of you in silence,
And often speak your name.
All we have left are memories,
And your picture in a frame.
You left behind broken hearts,
And happy memories, too.
But we never wanted memories,
We only wanted you.
Now our hearts are filled with sadness,
And our silent tears flow.
What it meant to lose you,
No one will ever know!
A million times we'll miss you
A million times we'll cry,
If love alone would have saved you
You never would have died.
In life we loved you dearly
In death we love you still.
In our hearts you hold a place
NO OTHER ONE CAN FILL.
The golden gates stood open,
God saw you needed rest.
God's Garden must be beautiful,
For he always picks the best.
Dedicated in memory of Renee Finstad
Joey's Angel sister
"I'll lend you for a little time
A child of Mine," He said,
"For you to love the while he lives
And mourn for when he is dead.
It may be six or seven years,
Or twenty two or three;
But will you, 'til I call him back,
Take care of him for Me?
He'll bring his charms to gladden you,
And should his stay be brief,
You'll have his loving memories
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn,
I've looked the wide world over
In My search for teachers true,
And from all the throngs that crowd
Life's lanes I've selected you.
Now will you give him all your love,
Not think the labor vain,
Nor hate Me when I come to call
To take him back again?"
I fancied that I heard them say,
"Dear Lord, Thy will be done."
For all the joy Thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter him with tenderness,
We'll love him while we may,
And for the happiness we've known,
Forever grateful stay;
But should the angels call for him
Sooner than we've planned
We'll brave the bitter grief
That comes and try to understand."
~Edgar A. Guest
You're A Special Little Spirit
"You're a Special Little Spirit,"
the all great Master said,
As he gently caressed the curly blond hair
of the Little Spirit's Head.
"you need to go to Earth to spend some time,
A place I send most Spirits to be tested,
to learn, to grow.
The Little Spirit, in sadness,
slowly bowed her head,
And from her eye a tear did steal
and down her cheek it shed.
"Don't you fret now little one,
I won't let you stay too long,
I'll bring you back to help me here,
You'll hardly know you've been gone.
You're my choicest Little Spirit,
you're the apple of my eye."
And he wiped the tear and
gently kissed His Little Spirit good-bye.
"I'm back," the Little Spirit whispered,
as she climbed onto her Master's knee,
And the Master said, "I told you, you would not
be long away from
And then, the Lord, He noticed
still another tear welled in her eye.
"Why are you so sad, Little Spirit,
whatever should make you cry?"
"I'm glad I'm back," the Spirit said,
"but Master you must surely know,
When your angel came to get me,
I didn't want to go.
I know you said you needed me and that
I'd be gone the shortest while,
But Lord, couldn't I have had a
little longer earthly trial?"
The Master let the Little Spirit
slip down from His knee,
He firmly took the little hand and said,
"Come walk with me."
The Little Spirit and her Lord
walked slowly hand in hand,
As the Master explained Her special part
in the great and marvelous
"Now Lord, I don't mean to argue,
I understand you need me home.
But I left in such a hurry,
I left everyone hurting and so alone.
I didn't let my earthly parents know
how much I loved them so.
I was much too small to tell them,
Lord, how will they ever know?
They feel they've been cheated,
and in a way so do I.
Not getting to share any more than we did,
how can I ever tell them
"Little Spirit, I know your heart is heavy
with the message you need to share.
But you need not worry anymore,
I'll watch over your loved ones there.
I'll send them loving comfort
as a strong and helping hand.
I'll content and give peace to their aching hearts,
so they will understand.
The Little Spirit looked up at her Master and said
"Thank you for explaining it to me.
And could you please tell them I'm safe and happy
and that someday
they'll be here with me."
"Yes," said the Lord with a smile and a nod,
"I'll tell them all that I can."
Then the others came to see the Little Spirit,
as the Lord let go of her hand.
He said, "I'll tell them you're pure,
as pure as Heaven's Gold,
That I needed the warmth of your perfect soul
to keep Heaven from getting cold."
A gift for you on Father's Day
What on earth could it be?
I know the gift you really want,
Is to once again, have me
Or perhaps the gift of understanding,
To understand a senseless loss.
I'm sorry, my dearest daddy,
But for those gifts,
you must talk to the boss.
The gifts that I can give today,
Are memories, both sad and sweet.
From the touch of your hand on mommy's tummy,
To my little tiny feet.
Remember the joy you felt inside,
When you found out you'd be my daddy?
The great big smile upon your face,
You were over the moon,
you were so happy.
Remember when you felt me move,
The wonder and love you'd feel?
Remember it today daddy,
It just might help you heal.
Remember the little cuddles we had,
And the moments that we shared.
Remember my little hands and the color of my hair,
I love you dearest daddy, you know that this is true.
Just keep your memories of me alive,
And I will always live in you.
adapted for Michaela
Gentle Savior, please look down...
There's someone at Your side.
A small bewildered little girl
Who needs You as her guide.
You'll know her name is Michaela
If her smile could melt a heart of stone.
She's without her mom, dad, and brothers, too
So please lead her safely home.
Keep her in Your tender care
And Your strong and warm embrace.
Please guide her to her heavenly home
With a smile upon her face.
You put a dimple on her cheek
And gave her hair so heavenly white.
Dear Lord, look after our little girl;
Guide her safely through each night.
Thank You, God, for the time we had
And all the memories we made
We'll keep Michaela forever in our hearts
And remember the love she gave.
God's Little Girl
Please don't be so sad,
I miss you so much too.
It's beautiful here where I am
But I worry a lot about you.
I sleep with angels watching me,
There's only love up here...
I'm never lonely or afraid,
'Cause God's so very near.
I walk with Jesus every day
He's very kind and sweet.
Don't worry mom; He holds my hand
When we cross a golden street.
I never cry or hurt myself
I see my Great-Grandmas everyday...
I play and laugh and sing a lot
And I hear you when you pray.
Please mommy, don't be mad at God
You see, He loves me too,
And even though you're not with me
I'm really still with you.
~Sharon Harper Sampson
I am Still her Mother
In a baby castle,
just beyond my eye
My baby plays with Angel toys
that money can not buy.
Who am I to wish her back
into this world of strife?
No, play on my baby,
you have eternal life.
At night when all is silent
and sleep forsakes my eyes,
I'll hear her tiny footsteps
come running to my side.
Her little hands caress me
so tenderly and sweet,
I'll breathe a prayer
and close my eyes
and embrace her in my sleep
Now I have a treasure
I rate above all other,
I have known true glory-
I am STILL her mother.
It's me, your little Angel
Just checking in with you.
I know you're sad
because I'm gone,
and Mummy I'm sad too.
It's beautiful here,
wherever I am,
there's such a lovely view.
But mostly when I'm sitting here
I'm looking down at you
I see all your feelings,
everyday when I look down,
I love to see you smile
and I know sometimes you frown
But guess what?
I have a job to do.
God saved it for your little girl.
I get to watch over you
and protect you from the world.
So though you cannot see me
and I know it's hard on you,
You'll surely see the benefits
of the job God has me do.
HANDPRINTS IN HEAVEN
Do they make handprints in heaven,
In a snow-white plaster mold?
Do they capture tiny fingers
That I barely got to hold?
Do they keep locks of hair in heaven,
That first small golden curl?
I never got to brush or comb
Upon my angel girl.
Will they write down when she starts to walk,
And post it in a book?
So I can see the cloud-lined path
Of every step she took.
Do they keep babyís shoes in heaven,
And have them cast in bronze?
The strings forever laced together
Like our mother-daughter bonds.
Will they keep my baby safe and warm,
And soothe her every cry?
Does she snuggle with the teddy bear
We sent with our last good-bye.
All these things and more are on the list
Of wishes that I make
For my newborn now above,
My rose God had to take.
Do they grant wishes up in heaven?
May she comfort me from above,
And may her arms grow big enough
To hold her motherís love.
We knew little that morning
that God would call your name,
In life, we loved you dearly,
In death, we do the same.
It broke our hearts to lose you
But you did not go alone.
For part of us went with you
The day God called you home.
You left us beautiful memories
Your love is still our guide
And though we cannot see you
You are always at our side.
Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same
But as God calls us one by one
The chain will link again.
Somebody said it was all for the best;
That something was probably wrong.
Somebody said it was meant to be.
Different verse, same miserable song.
Somebody said,"You can have another!"
As if that would make it alright.
Somebody said,"It was not a real child."
Somebody's not very bright.
Somebody thinks it is helpful
To say when grieving should end.
Somebody showed their true colors.
Somebody isn't a friend.
But somebody said,"I'm sorry"
And sat quietly by my side.
And somebody shared my sorrow
And held my hand when I cried.
And somebody always listened
And called my lost baby by name.
And somebody understood
That I'd never again be the same.
Best Angel Friends
A beautiful little angel
showed up to Heaven's gates
Confused and unknowing the plan
that for her awaits.
Then another little angel walked up
and took her hand
"Please don't be sad you left,
you're in the Promised Land."
"I'm glad to be here but
I do not think I was to go,
Perhaps there was a mistake,
for my mommy wanted me so."
The little greeting angel
gave a sweet smile and said,
"My mommy wanted me too,
but to Heaven I was led.
You see, we do not get to choose
when on Earth it's time to go.
He gave us life, love and joy
and a mother's womb to grow.
The Lord still needs new angels
to guide them down on earth.
To watch over, comfort them,
and help them see their worth."
"Is there still a way that I can sleep
in my mommy's bed?"
The greeting angel grinned and said,
"that luxury you'll keep.
I visit my mommy nightly
and softly sing her to sleep."
The little angel replied,
"then I think I'll like it here.
I'll visit my mommy nightly
and weaken her pain and fears.
I love her and will keep her safe
at night and in between,
And let her know with a sweet memory
that she is still with me."
The greeting angel gave her new friend
a big hug and said,
"Until our mommy's meet us here,
let's be best angel friends."
"Okay," said the new angel,
"that sounds good to me."
Then the angels sat and played
keeping their mommy's in sight,
Humming the tunes to the song
they would sing to their mommy's tonight...
"ANGELS AMONG US"