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My husband and I had been married 1 year when we decided to start trying for a baby. Everyone said to wait another year, that we were rushing ourselves. But, we wanted a baby more than anything in the world. Not even a month after our 1st year anniversary on January 2, 1999 I took a home pregnancy test and it was positive! We were so happy, and, couldn't believe that I was pregnant! We immediately called everyone with our news!

The pregnancy kind of came at a bad time because my husband is in the Navy and his ship was leaving in March for a 6-month deployment. We went to the military doctors for the first 3-month appointments. I had 2 ultra sounds and everything looked perfect! My husband and I chose not to do the AFP test because if there was going to be anything wrong with the baby we would deal with it then and love and care for him or her no matter what was wrong. One thing we weren't told was that it could detect fatal birth defects. We thought that the AFP was for Downs Syndrome and other things like that.

At the beginning of April I left for Indiana to be with my family for the remainder of the pregnancy while my husband was at sea. I felt Cameron move for the fist time not even a week after my husband left. I made my appointment with my new civilian doctor and got an ultra sound there. They weren't going to give me one since I had already had 2 but I wanted to know the sex and wanted to get a video to send to my husband. I got like 2 minutes of video and found out it was a BOY! When I got the ultra sound done they measured and everything was right on schedule, but, the head measured 3 to 4 weeks behind. I was a bit concerned but not too worried because I was told that the measurements could be off by just a centimeter. She referred me to a specialist so that I could get another ultrasound.

I had a whole week to wait to see if everything was all right. I asked everyone whom I knew in the medical field what it (the problem) could be. Everyone not to be concerned, there is a very rare birth defect but, it was rare and they told me not to worry. So I went into the doctors office thinking that I would walk out of there and everything would be just fine! Cameron would never cooperate (Cameron is what we named him) so they were pushing really hard on my stomach and pushing him up inside of me in order to get a better reading. They finally got a good look at his head and they started talking and were really concerned. They told me Cameron had Anencephaly and the condition was fatal! I lost it I cried uncontrollably. I had no clue what it (Anencephaly) was and why it was happening to us! Were young and healthy were supposed to have healthy children.

I didn't know what to do. My husband was on the other side of the world. I went to the American Red Cross and had them send a message to him. I didn't want him to find out that way but I had no other choice. That was a Monday and by early Tuesday morning he called me. Then by Thursday he was home!

Once we got together we started talking about what we were going to do. We got on the Internet and read stories and researched what Anencephaly really was. My mother chose to look at pictures, which were devastating. I chose not to look at most of them, only at the ones of babies that had caps on their heads. Whatever there was to see I didn't want it to scare me. I didn't even know if I would look at my own son's deformity. After what we learned on the Internet and what the doctors said we chose to have Cameron early. I went back for 1 more ultrasound and we got a really good look at Cameron's head. The doctor drew us a picture of what he thought Cameron would look like. Basically he showed his head ending at the eyebrows. He thought that there was skin covering his brain and then a small hole in the back. At least there was covering because at first we were thinking it was just all going to be exposed.

We chose to have Cameron early but I had a really hard time setting a date to go to the hospital to be induced. I chose to relax for a couple of weeks and enjoy him inside of me. He moved so much! It looked like a rolling pin inside of me. On May 23, 1999 at 6 PM I went into Methodist Hospital at 9 PM they put 3 seaweed sticks into my uterus and then a pill that caused cramping. They took the sea weed sticks out at about 4 in the morning and put in more pills. At about 10:30 I began to have hard labor pains. It may not have been 10:30 I didn't really look at the clock but anyway I was told not to push! They didn't want my water to break they wanted Cameron to come out still in the sack.

Cameron was born at 11:17 AM. They cut him out of the sack and laid him on my chest. He had hair and he had skull! The hole was only the size of a dime! He looked perfect. He had everything down to fingernail creases in his hands and eyelashes. I was so proud of him. All I could do was just stare at him which was when I saw his chest move! The nurse grabbed her stethoscope and heard his heart beat! We all got to hear it but sadly, it only lasted for 1 1/2 hours. Slowly he started to get cold and like a mother I just wrapped him up really tight in his blanket. We had him baptized, took tons of pictures and video taped. We got his feet and handprints on a basket lid, on paper for his baby book, molds of his feet and hands. He weighed 1 lb. 4 oz. and was 12 1/2 inches long. His feet and hands were so big! He was long and dangly.

The hospital had tiny outfits so Cameron did have something to wear and they even had tiny diapers! The bonnet on his head was so tiny, but, so cute! We held him till it was time to go home and my parents drove him to the funeral home, which was about 1 hour away. We went there to kiss him good bye. It was so hard to leave him there! On My 26th we buried him. I got to hold him till it was time to lay him down to rest in his little casket. We also drove him to his grave sight.

He wore an outfit that my cousin made for him. He was wrapped in a blanket that my grandma made for him. We put a picture of my husband and I in with him, and my husband even gave him his dog tag. We placed a couple toys in the casket for him. Cameron was buried next to his great grandpa who I know is taking care of him right now! We plan on trying to have another baby again, but I will be on Folic Acid for 3 months to help prevent this from happening again!

Here are pictures of Cameron. They show how beautiful he was and that not all babies with Anencephaly have an exposed brain or an empty cavity. I'm so proud of him and we love him so much! Our little Angel.

Thank you!
Written by Cameron's Mommy!

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Cameron's Page