Study Proves Each Side of Nose Sniffs Differently!

okay. here's another government report i did. i got an A on this one, and this one's a good one. this story was truthfully in the local newspaper, and i just HAD to write about it. enjoy!

In San Francisco, California, a bunch of scientists decided to study the difference between your nostrils. They studied this and studied it for months and months. They’ve determined that one nostril is for a certain type of smells, and the other is for the smells the 1st one forgot. Thus, giving us the ability to smell a lot of different things. Broadening our sense of smell. Apparently, the differences are caused by variations in the airflow through the nostrils. Curiously, the given nostril’s ability to smell certain odors varies, and often switches to the other nostril. The researchers discovered this, by taking 20 volunteers, sealing one of their nostrils and making them smell various scents. These were Octane and l-carvone (which was pointed out to have a peppermint scent) the researchers found that there was a difference, but it wasn’t like they were smelling an apple and then an orange. “It’s subtle enough that we had to have a careful experiment to test it out” one researcher was quoted as saying.

Well, I can safely say that my search for the weirdest story in the newspaper was well rewarded. I really don’t even have to touch this one. But since it’s an assignment, I’ll tell you exactly what I’m thinking at the moment. The first thing that comes to mind is “Why?!” it’s a good thing we’ve got these college taught scientists to solve pressing mysteries such as this one. I mean, who hasn’t thought to themselves on a daily basis “hey, I wonder if one nostril smells things differently than the other!” I know that’s plagued me for years. I’m glad the government finally put our hard earned tax dollars to good use! Why should we study a cure for AIDS or cancer, when we could be studying which nostril smells octane, and which one picks up peppermint! You know the average person is going to use that information on a daily basis. I personally will sleep better at night, knowing that my right nostril and my left nostril pick up different scents, thus broadening my ability to smell everything. Good to know we’re letting our government tax us into oblivion, so that the scientists can study important stuff like this! Well, all sarcasm aside, I think that the one thing that pops into my head after reading this article is, “man! I thought my SISTER had too much spare time!” it goes to show you kids, that if you go to college for 15 years, you could discover something important like “the fingernail on your right pointer finger grows 5% faster than the fingernail on both of your thumbs”. Thus providing groundbreaking information that will cause some obviously bored Register reporter to write a story on you. Sounds worth it to me! It’s good to have goals of a worthwhile occupation in science to study trite (yet obviously important and noteworthy) things like this! I, myself, think I’ll stick with the AIDS and Cancer research.