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Dear Waylon,
I suffer from a small penis and low self-esteem. How can I fix both problems with one punch?
Sadly Small In Utah
Dear Sadly,
I maybe just a good ol' boy, but I too know the sting of a small penis. However, I don't have a small penis, my friend does. We'll call him Wayons...Keenan Ivory Wayons. You see Keenan was afraid that his small penis would hinder his career and thus not make him popular. I told him that he should make a comedy show and call it "Keenan Ivory Wayons Has A Big Black Cock Funny Ha Ha Show." He did start a comedy show and happened to get his penis enlarged via surgery. So there.
Dear Good Ol' Boy,
Did you mean him no harm?
Wondering in Washington
Wondering,
Yes. That bastard slept with my girl…IN MY BED! Waylon doesn't like that kind of ghetto shit happening in his house. I hit the bastard with my steel guitar that Don Cheedle gave me and killed him dead. That man, you guessed it, Paul Harvey. Now you know the whole mother-fucking story.
Dear Mr. Jennings,
I like cheese, but my gal pal doesn't. This is causing a bad rift between us. What can we do to please both of us?
Cheese Lovin' Guy in Pittsburgh
Dear CLG,
Have a threesome. Always worked for me, Daisy Duke and Boss Hog. Oh, that sweet, sweet Daisy Duke. She liked it everywhere, if you catch my drift.
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