Develop deeper detail.

Details

Possible solutions:

a) Information is simply lacking. This writing is too brief.

Does my writing tell the who-what-when-where-why-how? 

Does my writing lack sensory detail? 

Are examples generalized instead of detailed and specific?

Do I use anecdotes?  Is the reader kept continually informed or entertained?

b) Information is obvious.

c) The information like reading a list

d) The writing re-tells the story instead of discussing a specific point.

Focus on a question that you would like to answer (or are required to answer). Then, use examples from the story to support this answer. Discuss how the examples you chose best support your answer.

Get more detail with these three strategies:

^ Add dialogue.

‚ Where were you standing? If it’s personal history, try to put yourself back when it happened.

; Freeze-Frame: how much more detail could you think of if it were a DVD and you hit the pause button?

L Look closer: examine what you are describing. Give more.

“This cannot be stated bluntly enough: The writer must have something to say…  It doesn’t matter if a writer begins it cleverly or ends it neatly, organizes it smoothing, writes it dramatically, writes it with voice.  The “it” itself has to have merit”   

- Ralph Fletcher

Vivid and explicit detail is as important in a short story as it might be in a business letter or research paper.   

 - Barry Lane

When I was in school, I thought details were just extra words to add in a story to make it better.  I thought detail was decoration or wallpaper…details are not wallpaper; they are walls.   

 -Barry Lane

I try to leave out the parts that people skip.     - Elmore Leorard in Charlton

Think small.  The best things to write about are often the tiniest things – your brother’s junk drawer, something weitd your dog once did, your grandma’s loose, wiggly neck, changing a dirty diaper, the moment you realized you were too old to take a bath with your older brother. 

- Ralph Fletcher