You’re probably wondering how her diatribe against innocent Faires came about. I’m a bit puzzled myself. It seems my sister was watching the comedienne Margaret Cho on television, and the latter mentioned, as part of her skit, that she had formerly worked in an S&M shop. She claims that the majority of her customers were Renaissance Faire goers or Star Trek fans, and they tended to be very demanding, picky people.
To me, this makes perfect sense. Of COURSE these people would visit S&M shops! Where else would they get their leather accessories? Ren Faire people would be seeking leather gauntlets and chainmail for period costumes, and Trekkies would be looking for warrior-type garments for Klingon costumes. And the fact that they’re picky means that they’re searching for specific items and not shopping for sex toys in general. I had no problem whatsoever with this idea.
My mom and sister, however, took a different view of the situation. They’re now convinced that Ren Faire people and Trekkies are sick, perverted sex maniacs, and want me to have nothing to do with them.
I don’t get this attitude. True, I have never been (and WOULD never be, so all of you out there can just put this out of mind) interested in the concept of sado-masochism. However, that does not mean that the people involved in those activities are nothing more than perverted sex fiends on some far-off and distant continent. Likely they’re the people I pass on the street daily, and wait on at work. I know for a fact that at least two such people have visited me at my workplace, due to rather questionable stains on their garments (and let me tell you, extensive hand-washings occured on both occasions).
However, I don’t believe--and whether this is based on past experience or pure naivite is your call, dear reader--that the Faire goers and Trekkies would be visiting such shops solely out of a driven perversity. I know for a fact that some very nice, classy leather items can indeed be purchased at nicer S&M stores. For example, take Xena’s--or better yet, Callisto’s--costume. Low-cut leather bustier, short skirt constructed of leather trim, tall leather boots, and the entire costume trimmed with pieces of metal. Sounds like something out of a B&D situation, right? Then look at the aforementioned costumes. They’re elegant and well-constructed (if not especially practical) garments. I bet that with a little ingenuity (and a sizable budget) you could easily build an entire Xenaesque costume out of the materials found at an S&M shop, including weapons (whips, knives, etc). For the Trekkies, you’ve got possibilities galore for Klingon costumes, especially for females.
As for the Renaissance Faire costume, you could supply yourself with a high-quality leather corset, gauntlets, chainmail, boots (provided they fit the period, of course), and possibly even weapons.
This opposition to Ren Faires comes at a most inconvenient time: I recently met an online friend at a Faire, and he invited me, Mom, and my sister to all visit the SilverLeaf Ren Faire next year in Kalamazoo. Mom thought he was great, and jumped on the idea like white on rice. Now she’s afraid of my becoming corrupted by these sinful deviants, so the Faire is potentially in limbo. It will be held in July 2003, so granted there’s plenty of time for her to change her mind; however, I hate the idea that she’s more easily influenced by some television personality than by the self-evident genteel behaviour of someone she’s actually met.
S&M shops: They’re not just for freaky nymphomaniacs anymore.