·Fabrication Ordinaire Reparation Dispendieuse (French for ordinary fabrication expensive repairs.)
·Ford Owners Recommend Dodge
·Flipped Over Russian Dune buggy
·Found On Russian Dump
·For Off Road Death
·Friggin Oakies Really Dig'em'
·Funky Old Road Dog
·Found On Roadside's Destroyed
·First On Recall Day
·Paid Inspector Nicely To Overlook
·Put In New Transmission Often
The people who say they would rather push a Ford than drive a Chevy usually do.
A Texan was talking big in a bar one night about how much money he had, how many women he had been with and how much land he owned. A young man, growing tired of all the big talk finally asked the Texan, "Just how much land do you actually own"? The Texan tipped back his cowboy hat and said to the young man " Well sonny let me put it to ya like this, I can get in my pickup at sunrise, drive all day long, skip lunch and still not get to the other side of my property by sundown". The young man shot back quickly, " Oh yeah, I know what you mean, I used to own a Ford truck too"!
Do you know why ford made their symbol the way they did? It says ford in the center and then it has a chrome outlining, they just circled their problem.
Jack: My parents just bought me a Ford Mustang.
John: So what did you do to make them mad?
From the past 10 years about 90% of Fords are still on the road, the other 10% made it home.
Here I sit
Bought a Ford
That almost started
I bought a Ford
And got it loaded
It laid down
And then exploded
I took it in
To get repaired
No such thing
Ford ain't prepared
Got it home
In great disgust
Now it sits
When it died
My friends agreed
It's one less chance
To hit a tree
The price you pay
To own a Ford
Is just one side
Of a double-edged sword
WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE IF YOU HAD 100 FORDS AND 1 CHEVY TRUCK?
You would have a good junkyard and 1 good tow truck.
Thank God Ford doesn't build airplanes.
HOW COME FORD MAKES TRACTORS AND CHEVY DOESN'T?
Because Chevy couldn't make them slow enough.
If all the vehicles in America were built Ford tough, the shoulders of America's highway would be a much more crowded place.
WHAT DOES THE GT STAND FOR ON A MUSTANG?
WHY DID FORD PUT HEATERS IN THE TAILGATES OF THEIR NEW TRUCKS?
To keep their hands warm when they are pushing the truck into the shop.
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A FORD AND A SHOPPING CART?
A shopping cart sure is a lot easier to push.
WHY ARE THERE SIDEWALKS BESIDE MOST STREETS AND HIGHWAYS?
So Ford owners have a safe place to walk home.
HOW IS A GOLF BALL DIFFERENT FROM A FORD?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards!
This is Chevrolet country and on a quiet night you can hear a Ford rust...
A man pulled up next to a little girl walking home from school and said "If you get in, I'll give you a lollypop." The girl kept walking. Following along slowly, the man said "Come on and get in the car with me and I'll give you two lollypops." She kept her eyes on the sidewalk and continued on her way. The man said "Get in with me and I'll give you this whole bag of lollipops!" Finally, the girl turned and said "Look daddy, YOU bought the Ford, YOU ride in it!!!"
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. If it wasn't for our Fords, our tools would rust.
This is your brain "CHEVROLET", this is your brain on drugs "FORD".
Buy a Ford and you buy the best. Drive the first mile and walk the rest.
Have you driven over a Ford lately?
Ford trucks the worst always rest
I could never keep a Ford under me, I was always under the Ford.
Next time some Fordnatic claims Ford means "First on race day" remind them that anything could be fast if a team of mechanics worked on it all week so it would last long enough to run one race before needing another weeks work.
WHY ARE THE NEW FORD TRUCKS MORE AERODYNAMIC?
So they will save the Chevrolet's gas when the Chevrolet's tows them away.
WHAT SHOULD THE FORD MUSTANG REALLY BE CALLED?
The Ford Rustang
WHY IS THIS COUNTRY SO FAR IN DEBT?
Because the President drives a Ford.
WHAT DID THE CHEVROLET SAY TO THE FORD?
Would you like a tow home?
HOW CAN THEY APPROVE THE NEW FORD TRUCK?
Put a Chevrolet engine in it.
HOW MUCH WOOD CAN A FORD TRUCK HAUL IF A FORD TRUCK COULD HAUL WOOD?
As much as the Chevrolet tow truck can tow in front of it.
WHAT SHOULD A FORD THUNDERBIRD REALLY BE CALLED?
A ford thunderturd
SPEED KILLS DRIVE A FORD LIVE FOREVER
I'd rather push a Chevrolet than drive a Ford!
HOW DO YOU DOUBLE THE VALUE OF A PINTO?
Fill it with gas!
Ford Escort Me To A CHEVROLET Dealer.
Have you out driven a Ford lately?
WHAT SHOULD A FORD TAURUS REALLY BE CALLED?
A Ford Tortious.
If Ford mean's (First on race day) It is only because it is still there from the last race day.
Ford is just jealous because Chevy is nicer and we get to wear our bowtie's all the time.
Do you know that Ford has admitted they are expensive and unreliable? That new commercial they are running says so! When Alan Jackson says "If I had me some money" he admits he can't afford one, and when he adds that he'd "buy a Ford truck or two" it because he needs a spare
Have you dusted a Ford lately?
. This is just humor, and if you did not appreciate any of it, tell it to someone who cares, because I don't. If you are offended, then I achieved my goal!