The Finale:
"Show Me My Money!"
by
Andy Zarowny

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We begin as we usually do, with Jeff narrating the standard recap of the past
13 weeks, finishing with Burton being booted off for a second, and last time.
As the real action starts, our sleepy heads awake on Day 37 to the sound of
a boat approaching.  Jeff arrives, bearing pastries, champagne, and OJ.  He
also delivers a packet of letters from home to each.  Jon keeps mum about
his letters, presumably one may be from his pseudo-dead Granny.  Lil is the
most emotional, weeping with joy.  Jon jumps all over her, claiming she'll
use this 'tactic' to sway favor with the Jury.  He calls her out on over-playing
the 'nice' card.  Jon even gets Darrah to more or less proclaim that she has
no intention of taking Lil to the Final Two.  This sets off a round of plotting.
Lil is upset with Darrah and wants Jon and Sandra to help her vote D off.
They agree, having just made a similar arrangement with Darrah to vote Lil
off next.  Let the games begin!

The Final Four then make their way to Tribal Council for the Immunity Chal-
lenge.  The task is to answer five factoids on pirate lore or survival correctly.
But there is one, last twist to The Game.  The Jury gets to play also, and
should they win, with their collective answer, there will be no immunity for
any of the Finalists.  Needless to say, the Jury wins.  Five brains are better
than four, especially these four.  Tribal Council begins and Lil gets weepy
about her letters from home.  Jon flashes an eye-roll to the Jury and they
nod accordingly.  It's time to vote.  Darrah, who had won three in a row,
casts her vote against Lil.  The rest boot Darrah off.

Night 37 and the Final Three return to camp and discuss booting Darrah.
Lil is happy that she did so when she learns that she was the alternate tar-
get.  Sandra announces that they have late-night tree-mail, which indicates
that they must get a very early start for the last Immunity Challenge.  But
before trudging off to the challenge, Jeff gathers the gang at the site of a
previous event.  The main prop was a beached pirate ship.  Jeff has the play-
ers place the torches of the booted, except for Osten's, on board the prop.
They are to say a with words about each of the former players.  Afterwhich,
the Finalists then shoot flares and ignite the vessel.  The ceremony is al-
most moving.  But it gives us the standard last view of all the season's
contestants.

The Final Immunity is a water challenge.  The standard endurance test, this
time on small rafts.  The knees and butts may not touch the raft, players may
use hands and feet to maintain balance.  After the 15 minute mark, Sandra
loses her balance due to a strong wave.  Smart move, Hon.  As Churchill
would say, "Why stand when you can sit."  Jon then begins several attempts
to strike a deal with Lil, but each fails.  After over two and a half hours, Jon
finally loses his balance.  Lil wins her first Immunity Challenge.

They march back to camp.  Lil is very happy she won.  She suspected that
neither Jon nor Sandra would take her to the Finals.  But now she must de-
cide who she will take.  Sandra plays the "I'm a mother with kids, too" card.
Jon plays his "Everybody despises me" card.  Both Sandra and Jon think
they will be booted by Lil as she makes no promises to either.  At Tribal
Council, Lil makes up her mind.  She votes with her heart instead of her
brain and chooses to take Sandra to the Finals.  Jon-E-Fair-Play gets the
boot, at long last!

Night 38 and the two ladies return to camp for the last time.  Lil tells Uncle
Cameraman that she thinks she has more friends on the Jury than Sandra.
Besides, if she would rather see Sandra win than Jon.  Sandra tells Uncle
that she is shocked to be in the Finals.  But it is all part of her strategy.  Day
39 arrives and the two gather up their belongings and head for the last
Tribal Council to face the Jury.

Continued on Page 2

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