Radio 1

The Hampstead Bowie Clone

Banned for life
From the institute of fame
Radio One, a million listeners can't be wrong
Switching off, not switching on

So you don't want to play my song on the air
'Cos I despise you and I'll say it, yes I dare

I got a stereo in my head
Got a hi-fi in my mansion
I'm searching for another way
Radio 2, radio 3 - it's very me

No I don't wanna "Get Jiggy With It"
Still got my Ziggy ticket
Just what the world needs now - another lousy boy-band
Imitation Velvet Underground

No-one likes the truth
Don't wanna be the voice of youth
I'm getting old and losing my hair
Got pretty eyes why should I care?

No I don't like Eminem
Hatred with a wicked beat
Oh why - 'cos I'm one of them
I'm a fag, you're a fake
Alex Donnelly are you awake?

Jo Whiley - you're so damn cool
Didn't I used to work with you?
Heard you snipe at my reformation
Heard you diss me on the TV
Put your words in the mouth of a fool
"I loved Wham when I was at school"

Mel C - you wannabe
Talented? - you got lucky

Buy a DJ - someone hip
About a went-far, too much lip
I used to worship you

Walked the streets with you to my ear
'Cos my mother said turn that down
Now if I had my way
I'd burn that building to the ground

Boy-bands and cheerleaders,
Homophobes and ear bleeders
American misplaced anger
I won't hang ya
I'll just hang myself

Castles in the sky
What the hell are they?
Who builds them anyway?
I kiss you Annie on One
John Peel the prodigal son

Didn't become a musician
To take the foetal position
Someone get me a gun
Screw you Radio One

A million listeners can't be wrong
Switching off not switching on (x3)
Not switching on (x2)
Be gone