The Believer is happy; the doubter is wise.-Hungarian Proverb
That all men are created equal is a proposition to which, at ordinary times, no sane individual has ever given assent.-Aldous Huxley
Melancholy Men, of all others, are the most witty.-Aristotle
Nothing is so aggravating as calmness.-Oscar Wilde
AIDS is a four-letter word.-Julian Ruck
The trouble with our times is that the future is not what is used to be.-Paul Valery
Optimism: the noble temptation to see too much in everything.-G.K. Chesterton
Conscience: The inner voice which warns us that someone may be looking.-H.L. Mencken
A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.-Don Marquis
Equality may perhaps be a right, but no power on earth can ever turn it into fact.-Honore de Balzac
A man gazing at starts is proverbially at the mercy of the puddles in the road.-Alexander Smith
America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilation.-Georges Clemenceau
Democracy is the art of running a circus from the monkey cage.-H.L. Mencken
So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence.-Bertrand Russel
You are free and that is why you are lost.-Franz Kafka
Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.-Bertrand Russel
Heaven, as conventionally conceived, is a place so inane, so dull, so useless, so miserable, that no-body has ever ventured to describe a whole day in heaven, though plenty of people have described a day at the seaside.-George Bernard Shaw
In heaven, all the interesting people are missing.-Nietzsche
The Jews are a frightened people. Nineteen centuries of Christian love have broken them down.-Israel Zangwill
If god did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.-Voltaire
Beware of the man whose god is in the skies.-George Bernard Shaw
A casual stroll through the insane asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.-Nietzsche
I cannot believe in a god who wants to be praised all the time.-Nietzsche
Randomness scares people. Religion is a way to explain the randomness.-Fran Lebowitz
The worshiper is the father of all gods.-H.L. Menken
Democracy is a process by which the people get to choose who will get the blame.-Laurence J. Peter
All religions are founded on the fear of the many and the cleverness of the few.-Stendhal
The public is a fool.-Alexander Pope
Pray, n. To ask the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.-Ambrose Bierce
If christ were here now there is one thing he would not be -- a Christian.-Mark Twain
Admiration, noun. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.-Ambrose Beirce
Always forgive your enemies -- nothing annoys them so much.-Oscar Wilde
Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors.-Oscar Wilde
I can sympathize with people's pains, but not with their pleasures. There is something curiously boring about somebody else's happiness.-Aldous Huxley
We learn from history that we do not learn from history.-Georg Hegel
It is only the poor who are forbidden to beg.-Anatole France
A promiscuous person is someone who is getting more sex than you are.-Victor Lownes
Getting out of bed in the morning is an act of false confidence.-Jules Feiffer
When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport, when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity.-George Bernard Shaw
Psychoanalysis: a rabbit that is swallowed by a boa constrictor that just wanted to see what it was like in there.-Karl Kraus
Bores bore each other too, but it never seems to teach them anything.-Don Marquis
Do you know on this one block you can buy croissants in five different places??There's one store called Bonjour Croissant. It makes me want to go to Paris and open a store called Hello Toast.-Fran Lebowitz
Kill one man and you are a murderer, kill millions and you are a conquerer, kill them all and you are a god.-Jean Rostand
Love is the desire to prostitute oneself.-Charles Baudelaire
Now we sit through Shakespeare in order to recognize the quotations.-Oscar Wilde
We may eventually realize that chastity is no more a virtue than malnutrition.-Alex Comfort
The meaning of life is that it stops.-Franz Kafka
To love ones self is the beginning of a lifelong romance.-Oscar Wilde
I am tired of fighting, our chiefs are killed...it is cold and we have no blankets. The little children are freezing to death...hear me, my chiefs, I am tired: my heart is sick and sad. From where the sun now stands...I will fight no more forever...-Chief Joseph, his last words before his tribe was slaughtered.
An eye for an eye only leads to more blindness.-Margaret Atwood
In every country and every age, the priest has been hostile to liberty.-Thomas Jefferson
The bible consists of six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that god doesn't love heterosexuals, just that they need more supervision.-Lynn Lavner
I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.-Wilson Mizner
The only Zen you find on top of mountains is the Zen you bring up there.-Robert M. Pirsig
If god created us in his image we have certainly returned the compliment.-Voltaire
Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.-Woody Allen
Sex is hardly ever just about sex.-Shirley Maclaine
Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.-Groucho Marx
To use the term "blind faith", is to use an adjective needlessly.-Julian Ruck
All that is gold does not glitter; not all those that wander are lost. -J. R. R. Tolkien
Grown men should not be having sex with prostitutes unless they are married to them.- Rev. Jerry Falwell, on CNN Crossfire.
No matter where you go--there you are.- Dr. Buckaroo Banzai
Playboy: Has no religion, in your estimation, ever offered anything of constructive value to human life? Ayn Rand: Qua religion, no - in the sense of blind belief, belief unsupported by, or contrary to, the facts of reality and the conclusions of reason. Faith, as such, is extremely detrimental to human life: it is the negatin of reason. But you must remember that religion is an early form of philosophy, that the first attempts to explain the universe, to give a coherent frame of reference to man's life and a code of moral values, were made by religion, before men graduated or developed enough to have philosophy. And, as philosophies, some religions have very valuable moral points. They may have a good influence or proper principles to inculate, but in a very contradictory context and, on a very - how should i say it? - dangerous or malevolent base: on the ground of faith.
Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese - G. K. Chesterton
A house without books is like a room without windows. - Unknown
They gave me a whack of cash - Kurt Vonnegut, when asked why he did the discover card commercial
To Kilgore Trout and all the beavers - Ringo Starr, dedication in his 1973 album.
And I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you any different. -Kurt Vonnegut
If Power asks why, then is Power weakness. - Aleister Crowley