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Poems
Tuesday, 2 December 2008

Tell Me

 

Tell me I am not alone

 Tell me you are feeling something too

Tell me all those past days and nights spent

Meant something to you 

Tell me I’m not just a fling

And I mean something special to you as well

Like you have always been to me

Tell me I’m much more than you dreamed

Or thought before we actually met

Tell me I’m your girl

So, I can officially call you my boy

Just tell me

Holding on is worth it

Letting go

Isn’t an option

At least not in my mind

Not just yet

Not after all this time

Just give me a chance babes

That’s all I ask

Tell me I am not alone

I’m not a quitter

So don’t make me one

I don’t give up so easily

You should even know that

Especially on someone like you

Something that feels so real

It can’t be wrong

Just please tell me I am not alone

Even though we may have our differences

I have always had your back

I’d do anything for you

I just want you to know that

Just please tell me I am not alone


Posted by xo919xo at 8:30 PM EST
Updated: Tuesday, 2 December 2008 8:33 PM EST
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Tuesday, 25 November 2008

“My Heart”

Let it float

Let it fly high

My heart is soaring

Oh what a ride

Every time you touch me

Every time you’re with me

I’m glowing

I’m showing this smile

That I can’t hide

Even if I tried

You question why I feel this way

Well babes just accept it this way

The truth is real

The facts are set

That someone like me

Likes you for you

That’s the reality of everything

Even if you can be a little butt

I still love it

No matter what

It gives us a pull

It gives us a struggle

And without that

Hell that would just be boring

 

 

“Birthday”

Another year older

Another year changed

Another year brighter

Another year with you

I love you,

Birthday boy

I really do

 

 


“Circles”

Going in circles

Day in and day out

At a crossroads

With just no way to get out

My mind is spinning

Everyday is a bad day

No one speaks the same language anymore as me

I wish I could find another route

Or someone to confide in

When did life get so hard and tough

When did I ever feel like giving up

Not until now…

That’s for damn sure

 

 

 

“High”

My eyes are red

My sadness is lifted

I feel like I’m flying high

Just like a kite

Soaring through the sky

I never want to get down

The smoke consumes me

And helps me get through the day

I might feel tired

But that goes a way eventually

Today I feel like I can be the hero of the day

So what if I’m high

That doesn’t stop me

From being me

Make it legal already USA

You know you want too

Be high just like me

 

“Him”

In my hands

Its beating slow

It’s cold

It’s broken

It’s red

Its dying

 

With you

Its beating fast

It’s warm with life

It’s mended and fixed

It’s deep with color

It’s alive for once,

I’m taking this chance,

Breaking the rules

I’m doing something over my feelings for him

 

But something is always there

Holding him back

My stomach is finally talking back

Sick of waiting

Waiting for his touch

 

I have patience’s to wait forever for him

I already feel like I have done so

What’s another year or so?

 

He means that much to me

I hope he see’s that by now

I really mean what I say

And my feelings won’t change

He should know that by now ;)

 

“Finally”

It’s about time

We’re here

Over and over

My dreams

Captured my feelings

For you

And finally

It’s true

It’s the reality

Of the here and now

We’re here

And it only took a year!

 

“Hurry Up And Wait”

Just hurry up and wait

Just listen to what I have to say

What you mean to me

Is much more than most could dream

I know it doesn’t seem real

But kid is really is

Just hurry up and wait

Just like fate decide

Fate please let me know

If this is your doing

If so you’re driving me crazy

Spending time with him

Just being with him

Hurry up and wait

Just hurry up and wait

To show you how I truly feel

We play the games

We made up our own rules

And I’ve memorized them all

Just hurry up and wait

Stay with me

Dream of me

Because I love you

And this waiting is killing me

Just hurry up and wait

I miss you already

Tell me I’m being crazy

  

“Jonathan”

Jonathan is his name

My heart rings over it

My stomach twists

My toes tingle

He has my heart, with just one look

And he doesn’t even know it

He captures me with just one kiss

He reads my head without me saying anything

My heart is his for the taking

I’m just waiting for him

To call me his…

 

 

“It Starts”

It starts in my toes

Then rushes to my head

To my fingers

Out to the rest of my body

Up to my mouth to make a smile

Down to my stomach to twist and turn

Just letting the butterflies in

Back up to my eyes to have them change color

And finally to my heart where it feels like flying

There’s no holding back

When my feelings are this real

You have the control over me anyone can see that

When I’m with you

My body can’t take it

But I’m still a fighter

And don’t you forget it


Posted by xo919xo at 3:49 PM EST
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Thursday, 7 August 2008

“Seventeen”

 

Crazy how it is sometimes

Life just pulls you one way

And you end up tailing behind

One day seems like a year

As a moment seems to disappear

Like an hour-glass slowly depleting

A feeling always remembered

And memories never forgotten

 

Time after time

The little things that stick out the most

Seem to mean the most

In this crazy game we call life

Nothing’s ever as it seems

As it almost feels like a dream

Being who you ought to be

At only seventeen

 

Everyone says it matters

What you wear

And what you think

But it doesn’t

Not at all

Not at seventeen

 

From the months

To the years quickly following after

No one can change that

Especially for being only seventeen

 

To everyone else you seem so young

But you can’t be

With morals like yours

Always knowing exactly when to say no

Everyone should give you credit

Heck you’re just seventeen

 

As this day begins to fade

And a new one starts all over again

I wish you the best

With plenty of luck

At being, who you are

You may only be seventeen

But, you’ll always seem older to me

“Dream”

 

 

Close your eyes

Fall fast asleep

Dream of me

As I dream of you

Keep me close

As I guard your heart

Understand your mind

And get to know who you are

You may be far from where I am

But the distance is nothing

I’ll always be here for you

Just hold my hand

And let me know

You can be my man

 

 

 

“Little Things”

 

It’s the little things that get to me

It’s the memories I’ll always remember

It’s the way I always felt

It’s the times I won’t forget

The little things that get to me

The moments we had

The times we spent

The lies that broke me

The times cheating happened

It was everything

Especially the little things

That seemed to change me the most

The little things that get to me…

 

 

 

“If You Only Knew”

 

If you only knew

What I felt

When your lips touched mine

They felt so fine

Just melting before you

I knew right then and there

I found love in your eyes

Holding me like you do

There’s nothing that I can do

But love you for you

If you only knew

There’s no way I can

Forget you

So don’t ask me too

I love you for you

There’s nothing that I can do

You made me fall for someone like you

You might forget me

But I won’t

Because a girl like me

Will always

Be in love with a guy like you

If you only knew…

I love you for you

 

 

 

“Something”

 

I felt something

I never saw

I saw something I never felt

It was pure

But it was sweet

It was cool beyond belief

More like bittersweet

The love for a simple melody

I think it was

When you met me…

 

 

 

“Thinking Lately”

 

If it’s all that I do

Just wondering about you

Kissing someone else

Loving someone else

When I still love you

The way that I do

The way I always have

Baby if you could only see

What you mean to me

Craving your lips

For just one kiss

I miss you beyond belief

I wish you only be

The man I used to know and love

I would give up everything

Just to be in your arms all over again

Just to know you feel the same as me

And know I’m not just loving the wall here besides me

Baby just let me know

You love me

As much as

I love you

Because you just got me

Thinking lately…

About ya

 

 

 

“This Girl”

 

I met a girl

That was like no other

Sure we was shy at first

While she carried her purse at Jesus Camp

Played her soccer

And talked about TANNER

But there was something more

Something that I couldn’t forget

Something inside this girl that I just had to know

Looking at this girl just makes you smile

Her style throws you

Her stories get to you

I met a girl

That you’ll never know

Cuz’ she lives in farm country

Where the cows go

But then again

I met a girl

That’s a crazy dancer

Knows exactly what to say

Even at the right time and moment

I met this girl

And don’t think I’m bi

But I love her

More than you’ll ever

Cuz’ she’s my very best friend Angelica Adriana

You see

She’ll always mean everything to me

Forever you’ll see

Yes I know I’m corny

Yes I know I’m crazy

But sorry I’m only

Trying to be truthful

To a simple friend…

 

 

 

“Darkness”

 

The clocks moving

But we’re just standing still

Not moving

Just looking

It’s kind of creepy

But kind of weird

Where did all our feelings go

Why don’t we let it show

You love me

I love you

People talk

People think

Just let them be

Don’t you see

I love you

But the hands keep moving

Time’s not rewinding

Just leave me here

In the dark…

Where the lights go out

Again and again

 

 

 

“Solidarity”

 

I go to sleep

Just to dream

About everything

Most of all

For what I have

Who I am

And what I believe

 

Just imagine

If the things you have

Were gone away with

The people you loved

Vanished before your eyes

The race you were

Was left in the dark

 

Answers and questions spinning out of control

Places and feelings there’s just nowhere to go

How is it we are blessed

But yet we’re not as thankful as all the rest

 

The pray we laugh

They cry we sigh

The live with nothing

We live with everything

But yet the world’s still collide

 

 

 

“Just Thought”

 

I just thought you were the one

Thought you were like no other

Pictures it in my heart and soul

Dreamt of it over and over

But something mislead me

Something screwed me over

Made me believe something

But that something just wasn’t there

Now this pain I feel

Is inside me

Deep within my butterflies

Among my shattered feelings, thoughts, and dreams

That; run right through this broken heart

Every time I try to breathe

It just gets harder and harder

Every time I’m in the sight of you

I just get dizzier and dizzier

You’ll never understand how good you had it

I loved you, with everything I had

And with that you screwed me over

Over and over again

 

 

 

“Once Again”

 

Standing out in the cold

No sight of where you’ve been once again

Everything’s changing from where we’ve been

Thoughts and feelings always adding up

Images of you and me gone and gone again

Only photographs remind me of our times

For this was our prime year

So listen up

Clearly now

This is how I felt

About everything

Once again…

 

It was as if by light shining through

A glimmer of hope was at my door

You told me you still loved me

I told you I still loved you

But that wasn’t enough

Would you still be true

By being only you

Once again

 

I can’t afford anymore pain

And I’m not asking to start a game

I just wanna know

Do you think…

You’ve got what I want

What I’ve been dreaming for

What I’ve been hoping for

If so please continue calling

But if not my heart’s broken once again

So thanks again for everything

Once again

 

I’m not just a girl

I’m a girl that’s crazy for dealing with you

And you’re not just a boy

You’re a boy that’s crazy

For dealing with me

But we love being crazy

So let’s just let that be

Once again

 

And in the end

You’ll always make me think

Wondering if another heart break is worth it

Wondering if you’ve really changed

For the better

Making me pick if I want you again

But don’t you know

I’ll only end up

Dazed and confused

Once again

 

 

 

“Jordan Baumes  #4”

11/10/88-10/21/05

 

 

 

Pictures and visions come to mind

Sayings and phrases are all that’s said

Memories of past times will never be forgotten

He was Jordan, or big red

Always there just being a friend

“You’re buttons undone again, Jordan”

I can hear him laughing in my head

Saying “Ms. Hartnett how’d you catch that?”

The peacemaker of our high school drama

The star of our basketball team

That was Jordan all right

He was more than just a friend

He was our role model

 

His words linger in my ears

As if he were still here

“Why aren’t you going to homecoming?”

“Because Molly won’t be there”

He loved Molly anyone could see

He respected everyone

A gentleman to be

 

Always positive, hugging, and smiling to anyone

Everyone knew Jordan

Right down to his big red fro

His last words I’ll never forget

“YO WE CRAZY”

And he was right

 

 

 

“One”

 

 

One decision

Can change it all

Your life

And everything else

One dilemma

Can render your future

Set you astray and make you confused

One choice

Yes or no

Or however the story goes

Can make everything

Seem so blurry

Expected to make

The best in everyway

But all you feel like

Is running away

Not fighting the battle

Or learning from your problems

You’re sick of everyone

Getting in the way

You’re sick of life

In everyway

One crossroad

Changes it all

Young or old

We all go through it

Sometimes when we expect it

Other times when we least expect it

But we all know

Sooner or later

We have to face the music

Better said then done my friends

Better said then done

 

 

 

“New”

 

 

Someone new

I’m thinking about you

Wishing on this star

For only you

Hoping you are doing the same

But with my luck its

All just a game

 

 

“Slowly Backwards”

 

There you are

Again just as I imagine

There’s everything

I remember

Just how it use to be

Too bad I’m only

Day dreaming…

Like I seem to often

Only wishing

Things went back

To how they used to be…

 

 

 

“Love Letter”

 

 

I wrote a letter

Just for you

Telling you how much

I do love you

Letting you know

I’ll always be there

No matter what we’ve better through

I wrote this letter

Just yesterday

When all my problems

Seemed so far away

I dropped the letter

In the mailbox

Said good-bye

And I was on my way

Always knowing that one

Letter will never change

What has happened

To us or help us out

Anyways

I wrote a letter

That did nothing

But only make me

Want you

More that I

Ever did…

Just my luck!

 

 

 

“Stomped Over”

 

 

Crowded in a certain place

No way to get out

No way to get in

All you see is faces

Pushing in pushing out

People start screaming

There is nothing you can do

But join them too

Chaos takes a turn for the worst

Shouting clawing

It seems this life maybe over

Before we even knew it

As the fire began to blaze

And face us with this great ordeal

Living or dying at only eighteen

 

 

 

 

“A Feeling Within”

 

 

Times are changing everyday

You’re getting older now in everyway

Realizing everything is for the better

Knowing nothing will ever be the same

Looking around and loving

It’s better than holding it in

Knowing that this is forever

A simple feeling within

 

 

 

“Wake Up And Open Your Eyes”

 

 

Wake up

Take a shower

Forget everything

About you and me

Start a new day

Pick out a new style

Be who you ought to be

In a whole new way

Go to school try your best

Letting your mind

Forget about the past

Talk a lot and smile too

Things like this can help me

Forget about you

Hang out with your crew

That never seems to judge you

Let your mind just drift away

And be who you ought to be

Just for today…

 

 

 

“Deep Inside”

 

 

Wake me up inside

When I feel like

I need to hide

Deep within my soul

Among my heart and mind

Let me know

You’ll be the one

My number one

Let me know

You’ll be my captain

My rock, my soul mate all in one

Let me know

That you’re there

No matter what

No matter when

Just let me know

I’m you’re number one

Because that’s what you’ve

Always been to me…

 

 

 

“Oh What A Day”

 

 

Thinking back to yesterday

Oh what a day

Before it started

It was over

Before it began

It ended

 

Nothing left to say

Come what may

Oh what a day

Don’t you say…

 

Getting sick and tired

Of this whole thing

It’s like I’m singing out of key

But then its just me

That’s left again

Kept so deep inside

Might as well just hide…

It’s better than many things

 

Before I took a breathe it was over

Before I looked up and smiled

It was over

Better said then done

Keep your feelings

Out of the way

Or you might as well get hurt

Trust me been there

Done that like they all say…

Oh what a day

 

 

 

“Seems”

 

 

I seem to always think of you

And everything we used to do

When I see you from time to time

I wish somehow, someway

There was a way we’d find

But the more I think

The more I know

That girl who makes you laugh

And makes you smile

Is better than I would ever be

Just trust me

And let that be

See, I’ll always love you

Just like you used too love me…

Or so it seems

 

 

 

“I’ll be gone”

 

 

10 more days

And I’ll be gone

Away from you

Who would’ve known

I’ll miss you

 I’ll think of you

And I’ll never forget you

 

Just kiss me slowly

Let me remember

Everything we’ve been through

 

Baby you’re the reason

I’m smiling today

 

As our dreams fade away

Never forget

I’ll always love you

Just put your hand in my hand baby

Your hand is mine to hold

My heart is sold…

 

We can build this thing together

Even stand in stone forever

I love you!

 

 

 

 

“Do They Really Know”

 

 

Do people understand what I’m thinking…

What’s running through my head

I might’ve said what I did

But do they really know what I’m feeling

As I’m dealing with all this…

My grades are slipping

My mind is going crazy

This life I’m living

It feels like it should be over

Over just like the end of a book…

“Miss You”

 

 

In class

My mind goes crazy

Just a little hazy

I feel a little dazy

I miss you

I love you

I wish you

Were here dear

To hold me

To love me

To tell me you’ll never leave me

So I can look in your eyes

And tell you the same

It’s not a game

It means a great deal to me hun

I love you Jeremy

 

 

 

“Crush”

 

 

There is nothing that I can do

It’s like that saying “you can look, but don’t touch”

You can smile just nothing else

You can’t forget there’s someone else

Who dreams of your smile

Who dreams of your touch

You can’t be like all the rest

Breaking his heart and going behind his back

That’s wrong, that’s not right…

Oh crush, I hope you understand

This won’t work this won’t last

You might as well just pass

Pick your books up

Keep your head up

And just walk pass

You’re a good kid

I’m sure you’ll find a good girl

I’m sorry but…

This girl’s taken

This girls in love

I couldn’t see why we can’t still be friends

It’s better then nothing

I hope you understand

My friend

 

 

 

“Baby, I Love You”

 

 

Whispering, laughing, holding

This is what I want

Kissing, cuddling, loving

This is what my dreams are about

I’ve never met anyone like you

I don’t know what I would do

If I were to lose you

There are very few guys that are like you

But, I only want one

And that’s you honey

I love you!

 

“Lost”

 

 

I’m so lost

I feel like I’m caught by a pull

I fought to get here

But now that feels so dim

I don’t know what to do

What would you do

If you were me

And I was you

Would you feel free

Like you can walk

You can stand

On your own again

You can speak

You can say

Whatever you want

And you don’t have to think twice

You have no one to worry about

Nothing to dread

Easier said then done

Oh what a life that would be…

If only you could see

How much you really mean to me

I hope you understand all you’ll ever be to me

Is simply just a good friend

 

 

 

“The Truth”

 

 

I’ve never been like this before

But then again who’s keeping score

I lost track back then

Now its time to pay the price

And face the facts

This pain is mine

These tears are mine

No one knows, no one knows, no one knows

I wish I could tell someone, anyone

But I can’t what would they say

What would they think

Maybe feel…about me

For the rest of my life

On my knees I beg

While tears fall like a waterfall

Constantly running down my cheeks and eyes

This wasn’t suppose to happen

It wasn’t suppose to be this way

I have dreams I have goals

But apparently I just threw them away

Like everyone I know would say

If only I looked in their eyes and told them

The truth

Everything would be okay

 

 

 

“Alone”

 

 

I feel so alone

No phone call from you since Thursday morning

I just don’t know what to do

Or who to turn too

Your grandma hung up on me

As soon as I said my name

Your friends and relatives say they haven’t seen you

You roommate won’t stop calling me and asking about you

You can’t leave me like this

I can’t do this alone

I thought you loved me

Where did you go

You making me cry day and night

With nightmares I can’t seem to get out of my head

And you promised you’d never hurt me

Just let me know your okay

That’s all I ask

I can’t deal with these days that have passed

I miss and love you way too much

To just let you go so easily

I told you I would never leave you

And I meant what I said

I’ll wait for you

As long as you want me too

I still love you Jeremy

I feel so alone

 

 

 

“Good-bye”

 

 

I just want you to know

I was with you a three years

I never once cheated on you

Yes I had many chances too

And you even know that

But guess what I never did

Because I always knew I did love you

In the back on my head

And I knew I trusted you

I won’t let you get the best of me

Not now not ever

You had you’re chance with me

And you blew it

Good-bye I should’ve knew it

 

 

 

“I’m So Over You”

 

 

Am I moving too fast

Am I trying too hard

If I’m living to die

Why am I dying to live

If I’m striving to become

What have I become

If I’m lost but found

Was I ever lost at all

 

But you were always pulling me back

Just like the rest of my past

Now you’re stuck in a rut

And you want to pull me back

No way not this time

You’ve tried and tried

You might as well just pass

Give up, I have its all in the past

You’re not worth my time, at least not this time

I’m just surprised I can still rhyme

It’s sad I know but so are you my friend

 

One of these days karma will come after you

Good luck with that you’re going to really need it

But whatever what do I care its not like you ever did

 

Everything is already said and done

Just leave pass, walk away

I’m done with your ass

Worrying about my past and looking back…on all the rest

Or was I just afraid that I let you get away with hurting me

Not anymore

That’s not who I am anymore

So fuck you

I’m so over you!

 

I hope you’re new girlfriend

Knows the truth about you

You’re a user and abuser

A liar and a deceiver

A player and an asshole

I’m so over you!

 

But, in the end

You’ll never let up

Just please stop calling me…

I’m so over you!

 

 

 

“From The Start”

 

 

Right from the start

She knew right away

Just the way he said his name

Boy, you got this girl going insane

She calls him her prince charming

He seems too good to be true

Holding the door for her

And surprising her when he can

After so long of hurting

What makes her so special

He calls her his princess

Even though she hates to be treated like one

He wants her to understand

That he’s a fan of her everything

But she doesn’t, not at all

Not one bit

She can’t get over the stupid things she’s done

He says it’s all in the past

She regrets them everyday

But he helps her get through them

With a smile and a phone call

Just one look in his eyes

And this girl knows

He’s for real

He’s telling the truth

Like she’s never heard before

She’s thinking she just maybe love this boy

The boy is thinking the same

The girl is me;

You are the boy sir

My prince charming

You are indeed my fairy tale baby!

MRB

 

 

“Prince Charming”

 

 

This is crazy

Just a little hazy

This feeling inside

It seems to good to be true

But, it has to be you

Prince charming where have you been

You have mended my broken heart

Made me feel like I was worth more

Shared your feelings, emotions, and kisses with me

What else is next

I don’t want to ever part

From the start

I knew right away

Just on that day there was something special about you

From this day on Prince Charming

You will be forever in my head

I love you Michael Robert Brand<3

Prince Charming where have you been all my life

 

 

“She’s Just Lost”

 

 

She’s been on the other side of the world

She’s done thing’s she’s not proud of

She’s played sports

She’s gotten hurt

Maybe more than some

She’s been the topic of every conversation

She’s been the dork that walked through the door

She’s been suspended from school

The joke is on the principle my friends

She’s been chased by cops

She’s been caught with drugs

She’s been in and out of the hospitals

More than she can count

She’s been tested more than animals

She’s been called a slut

She’s been called for bail

She’s been told she’s no good

But still she proves them wrong

She’s been called a sister and a friend

She almost died in an undertow when she was four

She was in a tornado once or twice

She’s been in love

She’s cried herself to sleep

She’s believed in fairy tales

And watched loved ones close die

Yet the nightmares and scars won’t seem to go away

Pain just stays the same

This girl is just lost

For the cost of it all

As she falls to the floor

Once again

What else is new

 

 

“My Big”

 

 

Her name is LeAnn VanDaesar

And she’s no Caesar

Most people just wish

They could be her

She owns more clothes than your mother

And drinks more than your father

But she has a great body

Like a super model

 

She makes

Her sisters of SOE

Look damn sexy

Can’t you see

Hehe

 

She drives a black jetta

That hisses in the warm weather

Yes she can even drive stick

She probably practices on Ricky’s dick

Gross! That’s sick!

I’m just glad he makes her happy

Even if they both are pretty damn sappy

 

She likes her MacDonald salads

And mustard on just about anything

We should all make a song about her

Fergalious, Pinky’s Way

 

You can say anything to her

And she’ll understand

She’s great at advice

Deciphering Disney trivia

And making you laugh even if your

As stubborn as me

 

She’s close to her mom

Wouldn’t you be

Her mom’s the bomb

And she even works in a factory

Making fishing line

Okay I guess I ran out of rhymes

But hey that’s pretty cool

 

She’s from Rome

Not Italy, New York

A pretty cool place

If I do say so myself

 

Overall this girl is amazing

That last poem I was just kidding

Just saying I hated her

 

She likes sports just as much as me

And Maliee her little doggie

She’s as crazy as me

LeAnn is level headed like my daddy says

She knows exactly what she wants to be

She makes everything look so easy

Geeze now I really do wish I were her

 

Then again in the end

I’m glad she’s my sister from another mister

And yes I really do love her

 

Liz and I will just have to fight over her

Even if they are soul mates

 

 

“All It Takes Is One Touch”

 

 

My hands get all tingly

My stomach sinks

When the butterflies come in

It feels like a sin

I’m taking

But, I don’t regret making

 

Your eyes see right through me

Like you’ve known me for years

You know my fears, wants, wishes, hopes and dreams

 

I feel like a little school girl all over again

When you touch me

When you hold me

When you tell me you love me

You understand what it means to be my man

 

When I don’t see you for awhile

All I have to do is dial you

Listen to your voice

And I can’t stop smiling all over again

 

For the next time I see you it makes it ten times greater

It feels like Christmas day

All it takes is one touch

And my hands go crazy again

 

I love you Michael Robert Brand

You mean the world to me

 

 

 

 

“My God”

 

 

She’ll sit here

Hearing all around her

But she’d rather be somewhere else

Not here

Not even close

 

She’ll look down at her cell

From time to time

Watching the time just pass by

She sighs

My God she misses him…

 

 

 

“Back Again…Bond”

 

 

I’m back again

It’s hard to believe

I touch the desk

Close my eyes

And hope to God he’s by my side

Open my eyes

And sure enough

I’m four hours from him

I broke down in tears yesterday

The word good-bye seemed so far away

But when it was my turn to say it

My tears did all the work

I know we’ll meet again

Just not soon enough

I just gotta remember to stay strong and tough

He loves me

I love him

Nothing can tear a bond like ours

A part

Back to school again…

 

 

 

 

“All Nighter”

 

 

I pulled an all nighter

Just sitting there

Thinking about how much I miss you

I sat up all night

Thinking about reasons

For what I love you

I couldn’t stop

Once I started

As you can probably tell

I’m still awake

I can’t go to sleep

Until you know them all

You might think

That is silly

But baby this is who I am

No matter the miles a part

It doesn’t stop my heart

I pulled an all nighter

And I’ll do it again real soon

Just thinking about you

Makes me feel closer to where you are

No miles can keep my heart

From you

Or staying true like I do

I love you

I would never leave you

I see a future with you

My all nighter lover

I just wanted to tell you

You’re worth it all

Michael Robert Brand<3

 

 

 

“The Space Between”

 

 

All these worlds are left unsaid

This question is forever running through my head

I read your note over and over

It said you’d wait for me

A month, year, or life time

Will you always be mine

 

These tears fall down constantly

Down my cheeks and eyes

You tell me you’re confused

But you still say, “I love you”

I’m alone

You’re alone

We agree on that, at least

 

The space between

Is what’s getting to us the most

You hate when I say, “I miss you baby”

Because, you know you miss me too

I’m sorry I can’t lie to you

Or hide my feelings, like you seem too

 

There’s no one else I’d rather be with

Than you

I love you more than anything

Those miles between

Have nothing on us

It’s just you and me baby

And that’s the way it should be

 

 

 

“I’ll Take It To The Grave”

 

 

Take this shaking knife from me

It’s pointing at my heart

This lie I have to keep from you

It’s tearing me apart

I don’t deserve you

I hurt you

It was a one time thing

Never again

 

I was never like this before

But lately who’s keep score

You want room to think

Then fine

You don’t know if you feel the same

Then fine

I feel I’m always waiting for you

A day, week, a month, or three

A phone call missed

Isn’t a big surprise

It’s actually something I’ve gotten used too

You’ve been confusing me

My thoughts and feelings

Aren’t helping me

Holding me under

Not letting me breathe

He was nothing close to you

And he never will be

 

My guilt is my punishment like the Scarlet Letter

I have to wear it on my sleeve

I fear if I tell you

I’ll never see you again

Walk away with your head down

I couldn’t bear to see you that way

With these tears in my eyes

And this visible mark on me

That no one can see but me

I have to be like all the men before you

In this life I lead

 

I let alcohol get the best of me

Just, please forgive me

 

Because I can’t forgive myself

The sound of your voice on the phone

Is killing me

Did, I make the right choice

Or make the worst mistake of my life

Thrown away my love in life

I’ll take it too the grave

I’m sorry but I have too

This hurts me more than you know

I’ll take it to the grave

“I’ll Get Pass It”

 

 

I can do it

Keep my head up

Act like nothing’s bothering me

Keep strong talk to you when ever I can

Let you know you’re the only thing in my heart and head

The only one I want to hold my hand

You’re in my heart

You’re on my lips

And on my words for these poems and phrases

The one I want to kiss

The one man I miss

I risked losing you once

I can’t do that anymore

I’ll get pass it

It might take some time

But I’ll do it

I have too

You probably never will

That’s why I choose to never tell you

And it’s always killing me in the back of my head

With your words, “I love you”

Always haunting me

I’m not worth your time

Its just better left unsaid

I’ll get pass it

One of these days…

Maybe someday

Or can I just dream

It will all just go away

Like a nightmare

From childhood

I’ll get pass it

 

 

 

“Just Friends”

 

 

I did something wrong

It wasn’t right

I listened to your voicemail

And I heard her name

I couldn’t help but listen

I’m sure any girl would do the same

If they knew your password

And the way you’ve been acting

 

She made it seem like

You were much more than just friends

Like a little school girl

She giggled saying your name

What am I suppose to think or say to you

Of course I deleted it right away

 

Maybe I was just looking to settle the score

Because, I feel guilty for what I’ve done before

With everything left unsaid

I can’t help deny it really makes me feel dead

 

Long distance seems to get harder and harder

Day in and day out

I just don’t know what to say

If you feel the same

Or is this still worth it

This just feels like a game

 

The more you push me away

The more I want to stay

I want to work through this

But I feel like it’s just me that wants it

Maybe it’s too late

I just don’t know anymore

Or maybe you’re right

And you’ve always been

We should be

Just friends

 

 

 

“I Feel So Numb”

 

 

I know I said I wouldn’t do it again

But what do you expect

You told me you were too busy

Well what else is next

I can’t do this anymore

Or settle this score

I’ve sinned before

But this is much more

I feel numb to everything

No longer guilty or afraid

I can’t hide this powerful thing

Don’t blame me for wanting more

I never did to you

It was always about you

Never once about me

Respected you did hurt yourself

I was still there

In times of need

This relationship takes it toll

On a mutual thing

Between you and me

You were always afraid

To say how you really feel

Until it got out

And you couldn’t take it anymore

Well it’s too late

It’s my turn to say

I can’t take it anymore

I guess this really isn’t fate

We never really had a first date

Good-bye

This is so over

In the end our story is out

But these feelings are

Forever in my head

I wish you really knew

How I truly feel…

 

 

 

 

“I’m Twisted In Place”

 

 

My emotions have a grip on me

My heart is on my sleeve

I have feelings for someone else

And someone else has feelings for me

 

I’m twisted in place

This isn’t right

And I can’t seem to face the reality

 

How can I love another

But like someone else

I’m cheating love

I’m playing the game

I’m doing something

I have no shame in

 

I’m twisted in place

I can’t pick which way to go

I love him

But I like you instead

What is going through my head

 

I’m fed up with this mess

I want to fess up

Just confess the truth

And tell the one I love

How I truly feel

 

But lately he’s been too busy

To ask me how I really feel

So I had the one I like to turn too

Oh God was that a bad mistake

 

It’s not you

It’s me

I’m not a cheater

I’m a lover

Not a fighter

And I can’t live with myself

I hurt him

 

I’m twisted in place

I’m twisted in place

I have no one to blame

But the insanity of myself

I take reasonability for my own actions

It’s time to pay the price

Face the facts

And uncover these lies

 

I’m twisted in place

And I don’t know what to do

Maybe distance will help

I’m twisted in place

Over you

Tell me what to do

 

I’m twisted in place

I’m twisted in place

I’m twisted in place

Oh my God

This isn’t me at all…

 

 

 

 

“You Can’t Keep Up”

 

I don’t understand guys like you

You have a girl

Eating out of the palm of your hands

But still you ask for more

You tell her you love her

Even though you really don’t

It’s like some sort of game to you

You want more than you bargained for

But there’s no buy one get one free on this girl

At least not anymore

Sorry try the next girl

I hear you’re good at that

Maybe Rachel will do

I’m sure her boyfriend won’t find out

 

I hope your girl knows about you

If not

Sooner or later she will

Karma’s got your back

You better keep up

 

Not everything’s that easy

Even you should know that

Check out that score

You better keep up

The pace just picked up

Faster and faster

You’re doing this to yourself

I’m just enjoying the game

But, it feels like I have ESP

Like I’ve been here before

 

Unfortunately I’m just as guilty

My guilt is my own

I grim and bare

My punishment

But you can’t keep up

You made your bed

Now lie in it

Not literately

Figuratively

Of course you’d never understand it

So forget it

 

You disgust me

It’s as simple as that

For playing along with you

Well not anymore

I’ve retired my number

The coach took me out

I can’t take anymore

My friend’s just laugh at me

I’ll take that

My guilt is my own punishment

It’s sad

You can’t even admit that

What what

 

Okay I’ll admit it

I got her drunk and wasted

Stoned until she just roamed

Unable to speak

Unable to communicate to anyone around her

I was the one

That crossed out her, “I love you”

On your white t-shirt

It was just for shits and giggles

And yeah I’ll admit it

It was wrong

And overrated

I was immature

And stupid

Sorry to your girl

If she were to ever hear this

You can’t keep up

 

I was the one you kissed upstairs

While she was unaware what was going on downstairs

When she left

I was the one you called on

To sleep with

Mess with

And dream with

I was the one you cheated on her with

Not just once 5 times now

Who’s keeping score

I didn’t even know

You had a girl

But you knew about my boy

Can you say scumbag

You can’t keep up

 

I was the one then

And now I’m the one saying good-bye

I’m so over you

I’m so sick of who I’ve become

I can’t keep up

It seems so fake

 

Your girl may never forgive me

My boy may do the same

Well at least I had the balls to admit the truth

Even if it’s through this poem

I got it out of my head

 On to this paper

Relax and catch your breathe

I’m done with this shit

You can’t keep up

 

Stop calling

I’m no booty call

At least not anymore

You’re sex was whack as it was

You better be falling now

To the ground

Smacking your head on the floor

Maybe that would put some sense in you

Or maybe not you are just Hydro

The water sign

Nothing ever sticks in your head

 

You can’t keep up

The pace slowed up

Come on your pathetic

I’m walking now

Stop breathing so hard

 

I blame myself

For getting caught up

That’s my deal

I’ll take it

More than you would ever

What else is new

 

You can’t keep up

I’m over you

What did I ever see in you to begin with

You can’t keep up

I’m passed home plate

The crowd is going wild

I won the game

And you’re still breathing hard

How pathetic

Lose some weight already

 

 

 

“I Want Him Instead”

 

 

I’m famous for the mistake I did

But I regret making

I want him instead

I’m sick of what I did

I’m pass that

I’m over it

And so should you be

You flirt with other girls

But you say you have one main girl

What do I care

You’re hurting her not me

I want him instead

You text

And call me constantly

Hey Hydro

Get over yourself

I’ve had better

Even by a girl

Grow some balls

Maybe a dick

And go get on with it

I want him instead

 

 

 

“I Did It”

 

 

I told the truth

I uncovered this lie

 

But why do I feel so dead instead

I took off the necklace

I cried myself to sleep

I read his note over and over

I looked at old pictures

I miss him more than anything

But I did it

I should feel happy right

 

I told the truth

I uncovered this lie

 

And he won’t forgive me

Maybe it just wasn’t ever meant to be

It was always the distance

That we had a problem with

I did it

 

I told the truth

I uncovered this lie

 

But I can’t seem to hide these feelings

Or ever get to sleep

I’ll always love him

As you can plainly see

Is it bad that I just want him back

 

I told the truth

I uncovered this lie

I did it

 

 

 

“Whatever It Takes”

 

 

Whatever it takes

I’ll do

Whatever you want

I’ll see it through

I’ll do anything just for you

You say it

It’s done

No questions or hesitations

 

To hold your hand

To have you be my man

To just help you understand

 

Whatever it takes

I’ll do

Whatever you want

I’ll see it through

I’ll do anything just for you

You say it

It’s done

No questions or hesitations

 

I messed up

I won’t hide it

But no matter what I do

I can’t deny it

My feelings for you are true

Michael Robert Brand, I’ll always love you

 

Whatever it takes

I’ll do

Whatever you want

I’ll see it through

I’ll do anything just for you

You say it

It’s done

No questions or hesitations

 

Whatever it takes

Sweat and blood

To earn your trust back

I’ll do it

Just to be with you again

 

Whatever it takes

I’ll do

Whatever you want

I’ll see it through

I’ll do anything just for you

You say it

It’s done

No questions or hesitations

 

This time and space from you

Is my punishment

Tell me holding on is worth it

Or moving on and letting go

Is what you want

Because baby whatever it takes I’ll do

I’ll see it through

I won’t give up on you

Not just yet

I miss you

 

Whatever it takes

I’ll do

Whatever you want

I’ll see it through

I’ll do anything just for you

You say it

It’s done

No questions or hesitations

 

 

“Decisions”

 

 

Yes or no

Should we stay

Or should we go

Mother may I please

Just get you out of my head

Move on with all these

Decisions still going through my head

 

 

 

 

“Time”

 

 

Time’s moving forward

But I’m always looking back

Wondering if what I did was worth it

If this is really meant to be

I love you

Just the same as the first time I told you

Nothing will change that

 

Time’s moving forward

But I’m always looking back

I did you dirty

I spit on your heart

There’s no way you deserve that

Move on baby

 

Time’s moving forward

But I’m always looking back

You can do it

Don’t think any other way

You did the right thing

This is the hardest thing for me to say

 

Time’s moving forward

But I’m always looking back

Wondering if what I did was worth it

If this is really meant to be

I love you

I’ll always be here for you

 

Time’s moving forward

But I’m always looking back

Was it really worth it in the end

I guess I’ll always be the one missing you instead

What can I say

People make mistakes

I’m sorry

 I hurt you

But I’ll always love you just the same

 

 

 

 

“The Cheating Game”

 

 

When I met you

I saw your letters right away

Confused and unfamiliar with LIU

 

I didn’t care about my feelings back then

I was faithful and hopeful

So deep in love with another

 

As time went on that quickly halted

I was found at fault

For having feelings for you

Quickly, telling my mind to leave you alone

My distance lover

Left me hanging

As his phone never ringing

 

You were there

In times of trouble

When I needed someone the most

 

I wasn’t trying

To cheat it’s just the game

I learned, when we got together

 

I don’t regret it

Even if I should

Because I really do like you

 

It’s called the cheating game

You win some and lose some

And life goes on

You regret you change

But your feelings are forever the same

 

I still love my distance lover…

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I Don’t Know Anyone”

 

 

I say I’m sorry over and over

But it doesn’t help

I tell you I miss you

You say “I’m not sure what you want me to say”

I don’t expect you to say a thing

I just want you to understand

I still do love you, I do still care, I’m still here holding on

I don’t know anymore, what more can I say that I haven’t before

I’ll always regret but never forget…

For what we had

Maybe it’s just better off this way

I’m sorry I got in your way for finding number one

Better luck next time everyone will say to us

It’s always the same story

I don’t know anymore

What more can I say that I haven’t before

 

 

“Shower”

 

 

I take a shower

Twice a day

To wash away my troubles

But nothing seems to help

There’s something about this place

About who I am

Is really getting to me

I can’t seem to deal

With what I’ve done

Or who I’ve become

God help me pull this knife back

From coasting against my skin

I miss him

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Trying”

 

 

Trying to stay awake

For the sake of it all

Trying to keep my eyes open

Before I fall fast asleep

Is it bad

That I don’t seem to care anymore

Nothing seems the same anymore

My grades are slipping

And I can’t stop skipping class and everything else

I kiss a guy

The next day I kiss a new one

Nothing else besides with my ex

Which I regret as it is

Trying my best not to think of him

Trying my best to not love him anymore

But you know the truth

Just look in my eyes they don’t lie

You can clearly see

I still adore him

Just like before, I wish I didn’t anymore

Trying to stay awake…

Trying, just trying

 

 

 

“Before She Was My Sister”

 

 

I met her so long ago it seems

But who’s keeping the score

I lost track back then

Somewhere between the exs and the sex

Before the long nights

Staying up all night

And cramming for the big test

Somewhere in the middle of all the fights

The hearts broken

The tears shed

The pictures taken

The memories still in my head

The words spoken

The friendships started

The smile made

She was my friend before my sister

She was my role model before she left

She was on my line

She understood what it meant to be on time

I met her so long ago it seems

And now she’s leaving for the Army

Good luck to her and all she does

She’ll always be in my heart and in my prayers

Love you, Jenna!

 

 

 

“Foolish”

 

 

Foolish girl what are you looking for

You know you’ve been here many times before

Foolish girl what is up your sleeve

Why must you plead

For the things you will never see

You had the key in the palm of your hands

But you let it slip

You let it slide

Now you watch from the side lines

As you hide away

In dismay

Hoping one day

It will come again and set you free

Foolish girl it’s always the same story

Deception lies, actions never taken

Foolish girl what are you searching for

Disappointment is more like it

Foolish girl just move on

Get used to being let down

Foolish girl hold your head up

And smile like you know you can

Foolish girl just for today

Act like no one can steal your soul away

 

 

 

 

“Untitled”

 

 

He’s a player

You’re a whore

What more are you looking for

He wants the easy things

You want to show him you’ve changed

There’s something about this boy

That has you coming back for more

 

You don’t know where to begin

You don’t know where to start

 

He gives you butterflies

As soon as you walk through the door

Makes you feel weak like nothing you felt before

You’re feelings are getting to you

You’re emotions are on your sleeve

He’s an asshole

You’re a bitch

But still things don’t change

You like how they stay the same

 

You don’t know where to begin

You don’t know where to start

 

He’s not like a boy you’ve ever met before

He’ll beat you up

Tell you how it really is

Before you walk out the door

He makes you smile

You make him smile

Even if you are just good friends

 

You don’t know where to begin

You don’t know where to start

 

He plays with your emotions

You play with his heart

It’s a win, win situation

With the tension in your heads

Being in control

Fighting for so much more

Is what has you coming back for more

You love the pull

You love the struggle

 

You don’t know where to begin

You don’t know where to start

 

It’s the things you can’t have

You want more of

Why does life never seem fair enough

You just want to show him you’re worth it

Even if the two of you have been hurt before

But that’s in the past

And we’re in the present

Time’s moving forward

We aren’t looking back

Your not getting any younger

Age is just a number

 

You don’t know where to begin

You don’t know where to start

 

You just want a chance

To take a risk

And when everyone asks if you’ll jump off a bridge

You’ll take that dare

You’re not scared

You only live once why not take a leap

Have fun and not regret

The choices you’ve made

 

You don’t know where to begin

You don’t know where to start

 

All you want to do

Is to make something special with him

But what more can you ask for

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Something Rather Than Nothing”

 

 

I’ve made all, the mistakes in my life I can

The only thing I want to do now

Is start something

With you

That’s unplanned

Something that’s not according to the plan

Something that takes a risk

To an unheard of beginning

Or a shaky start

Something life should be all about

Something you don’t know which way it will go

Something that will be fun but yet exciting too

Something that will have its downs but ups

With every unknown step we take

Conversations will help

To built the foundation of everything

That something will grow and grow

And if it may die someday, someway

Well at least we can say

We gave it our all

We at least can say we tried

Something rather than nothing at all


Posted by xo919xo at 4:12 AM EDT
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