-Sunday, June 28, 2009-

Fun little update. There was a major crash on my computer (I'm sending this message via a laptop) and everything on it is gone forever.
If there was a time for me to make this game, it would be in my teen years, but now I'm 17 and have to worry about real life problems like jobs and colleges and I really don't have time for it anymore.
Sad news, but let's face it: After three previous failed attempts, what were the odds of making a success?
Sorry, but it's all gone. Please remember I've lost a lot more than just the data on the Colbert Report Video Game.
But guess what? It could be worse. You might think, Oh I can only imagine how much worse it could be. But guess what again? I've already been through worse than losing all the works built up over the course of several years. That's right, I've been through far worse, and I'm more than prepared to build up stuff all over again. I'm a veteran of destruction building. Ha. Usually I say something like, "Good luck to me" at the end of my messages, but I already know I won't need it. It may seem irrational to be so overly confident and assured by nothing, but that's called hope. Blind faith that everything will always be perfect. Hope. Kind of like a placebo! Think about it, friends. And, if you don't have hope, if you aren't an idealist, then good luck to you and good day.
- Michael John "Squirrel" Garofalo

-Monday, May 18, 2009-

With things like prom, ap exams, and other things, I have barely been able to work on the game at all for about a month. I am sorry. But I myself am doing very well and am very well off. Good luck to me for getting around to working on this project.

-Sunday, April 26, 2009-

Not much to report today, except that progress on what will be the most amazing game ever (not really) is coming along schnitzel schmooth. In the meantime, here's some more of my spare Colbartwork:

-Saturday, April 18, 2009-

How happy am I to say that development on my third (fourth? I've lost track) Colbert Report Video Game attempt has begun. All my previous tries haven't been able to make it through the pain that is known as the internets.
But this time will be different, I promise you! I can guarantee that if the game isn't completed/doesn't work, it will be for a different reason than the previous reasons that have halted me.
The point to keep in mind: Things are progessing very well at this point. Expect a youtube trailer in the weeks to come, and then hopefully not long afterward, a demo.

-Friday, April 10, 2009-

Nothing too important to mention at this time, except that progress is being made as expected. I just wanted to share this image, which may or may not appear in the game:

I wish Stephen Colbert would hold me in real life that way. Whenever I pose for pictures, I always do that Stephen Colbert pose. Well, anyway...

The site has (somehow) been getting a tad more traffic than usual, so that's good. If enough of you heroes like the sound of the project, feel free to join my team! Currently, I've been solo since the start of this project. Well, expect more goodies to come later. Until next time, heroes.

-Tuesday, April 7, 2009-

Good news, fans. Spring break starts now. What do I have to do during this time? Not much, so expect progress. With enough progress, I hope for this game to explode into an entirely new level. Then I'll be rich and famous! I mean, you'll be happy and satisfied. Good luck to me.

-Sunday, March 29, 2009-

The project, as you may know, has been very off and on for like a year or something. But some revolutionizing things have occured and the game, I expect, can potentially be made and played and good. Here is how things are:
-The game will be made with RPG Maker 2003 (though it will not have any RPG qualities)
-Gameplay will be a series of minigames (similar to Mario Party) against various villains from different parts of The Report's history (for example: Rain). It may end up like an actual video game of Bonnie's green screen challenge entry.
-Music has been one of my hardest decisions to make. My first consideration was to use music by Cheap Trick, because they wrote and performed "Baby Mumbles", the theme song of the Report. My second idea is to use the many remixes of Stephen Colbert that were made during his interview with Lawrence Lessig.
-Currently, my idea is to present the game in a format that resembles a comic book. That means there will be a load of new Colbert artwork, and I think all of my current portraits of Colbert have been pretty good. There will also be a bit of voice acting.
-That's all I feel like revealing for now, but my team of myself and me seem to have the best ideas yet.

-Wednesday, January 21, 2009-

So... The message this week is the same as last week. Little progress. I really don't have much motivation, aside from spreading freedom, but this is America, so freedom is already in surplus. So I'm seventeen now. In case anyone cares, my birthday presents were (in order of importance): comic books, a haircut, Lego Batman the video game, and a phone. My next present will be acing my SATs. Hopefully you, the heroes, will be able to celebrate my birthday too, by one day enjoying The Colbert Report Unofficially Official Video Game.

-Wednesday, January 14, 2009-

The update today is to mention that I have not been able to make much progress at all lately. I have to take all my final exams in school (3 in one day) on my birthday, January 16, which is the last day of the semester. Then I have to take the SAT. Hopefully my score will be higher than Mr. Colbert's (combined score: 95). But I have a 4 or 5 day birthday weekend from MLKJ day and the inauguration.
May freedom be with you.

-Tuesday, January 6, 2009-

Here is what has been decided about the rebooted project:
It will be a RPG, made with RPG Maker 2003.
It may not be as good as originally intended.
There may be even more of your favorite characters.
The story has become a bit more detailed, and there will be a lot more dialogue (and monologue) than originally intended.

Also, you may want to see Mr. Colbert's working character design. Graphics may be subject to change, but don't expect any them to if you don't like it. Unless you start a petition.

On a side note, the Colboard forum has closed down. A more official forum has been opened and is accessible from the Colbert Nation, but guess what? A requirement at this new forum is that you must be 18! I turn 17 on January 16, and I don't want to lie. So I get less publicity. Oh well. If I become famous, I'm sure productivity will increase.

-Sunday, December 28, 2008-

The project has been cancelled for several months. Until now! True, there were almost an infinite number of problems with the game previously. There still are. But I guess I had miraculous Christmas epiphany. I asked myself, "Why use Game Maker?". Though I do have a reasonable amount of experience with it, and though it would be best, in my opinion, to give the game the best feel I want for it, I do not need to use it. And because it is Game Maker entirely giving everyone mind-crushing problems, I have decided not to use it. This does mean that the game will not be a platformer or anything arcade-like, as previously planned. It also means we, the heroes, are back at square one. Currently, I am thinking of a role-playing game style, just because it seems the most likely to work from what I have.
As usual, feel free to contact me to give advice, feedback, and whatever at MGaro42@yahoo.com.
I never wanted progress on the game to stop, so I'm not letting it.

-Monday, October 27, 2008-

The update today is to announce all of the bad things that have happened to this game so far. First, I would like to mention that when I first uploaded the game, two people responded by saying that it didn't work, for reasons I don't understand. If one person downloads the game and tells me that they are able to play, then work will continue.
But that is only the first part. I tried to upload the game to YoYo Games, which is the official Game Maker website. At that website, the game would not have to be downloaded to be played. On the fifteenth, I uploaded the game and am waitng still for a response. Because a ridiculous length of time has passed, I tried uploading the game again in case there was a mistake or something. I did and shortly after got a message telling me a virus was found in what I uploaded. However, there actually wasn't. If there was, the first upload would have told me so. But I listened anyway. I scanned my computer, created a new download, and then tried to upload the game again. I got the same message.
Lastly, I've been too busy to work on the game, but that seems okay now that I know the internet is preventing me from sharing what I've done.
Sorry about this update. Unless I get some ray of hope, the project is canceled. If someone could contact me at the Colboard or at my email MGaro42@yahoo.com telling me that the download worked for them, I will definitely pick up the project. I wish I didn't have to stop, but it would be almost pointless for this to be made but not enjoyed.

-Friday, October 17, 2008-

Apparently, the download hasn't been working for some people. The game itself can be downloaded but cannot be played for a reason I don't know. In an effort to fix this problem that some people have, I am trying to host the game on the Game Maker official website, YoYo Games, where the game can be formatted to be played without being downloaded, which, I figured, would solve the problem. While uploading the game, the website informed me that the game may take a while to be formatted. It has been a couple days now, and I'm hoping that it will be playable from the site sometime soon. Sorry about this major inconvenience.

-Sunday, October 12, 2008-

Well, guess what? THE DEMO FOR THE GAME IS AVAILABLE NOW!!! I actually didn't think I would be able to get the demo completed this quickly, but I'm sure you won't mind. You can go to the download page or click the link below to play the game. The download link itself is at the bottom of the page in tiny letters.

Download Colbert_Report_Game.exe Demo!

-Saturday, October 11, 2008-

Here is what the game will look like:

Expect more stuff soon!

-Wednesday, October 8, 2008-

I've been pretty caught up in school lately, so I haven't had much time to work. But I have had enough time to do some graphics and programming. Enjoy this first unofficial screenshot of the unofficially official Colbert Report video game:

Stephen Colbert confronts a bear in New York City with full health and 0 points.

I'm hoping you haven't noticed that the bear's head looks like a raccoon's head yet. Well, I guess you have now. I'm not very good at graphics design, so I'm glad for what I've been able to do up to this point.
As for the future, expect a video to appear on Youtube showing Mr. Colbert run through New York City battling the various enemies in the game and exemplifying gameplay. Sometime after that, a demo of the game will be released. Anyway, progress is coming quite nicely.
On a concluding note, I don't have to go to school tomorrow because of the wonderful holiday, Yom Kippur. What makes it wonderful? I get a day off of school. And why is that wonderful? More progress can be made and you, the heroes, and hopefully even Stephen Colbert will be satisfied sooner.
Thank you.

-Sunday, October 5, 2008-

There is not much to update today, but I would just like to inform you, the heroes, that progress on the game is coming swimmingly, and the results are quite good. I would also like to say, even though I am still an inexperienced game designer, that I believe this game will be one of my best ever, if not the best. That's about all.

-Saturday, October 4, 2008-

Well, this is the first update in three days. I would like to announce that the programming on the game has begun. The graphics are not fully complete, but I have decided to begin with what I have and add more when necessary. So... I hope that my skills in programming are good enough to make this game good and fun. Gameplay will be pretty simple, but I expect at least fans of the Report to be mildly entertained. I may be able to create a screenshot of the game sometime, but maybe not. Good luck to me.

-Wednesday, October 1, 2008-

Hello. I am sorry to say that today I haven't worked on the game. You see, I just bought Megaman 9 for my Wii today (which, coincidentally, has the play style I'm trying to mimic for the Colbert Report game), and that in addition to tons of homework= no work done on what will be the best game ever. Well, not really. Anyway, I guess today's update is just an apology.
By the way (and this may just be because this game has not been publicized much), I have gotten about, well, let's see.... NO suggestions yet. Sure, this site has only been around for about a week, and sure, the main publicity page is just a topic at the Colboard, but please understand that without any assistance from you, the heroes, this game definitely will not be as good. I don't need any help with programming or graphics; just some advice and suggestions. My ideas alone are not, in my opinion, worthy of the almighty Stephen Colbert.
Thank you.

-Tuesday, September 30, 2008-

Today is Rosh Hashanah. Why is it a good holiday? It gives me a day off of school. And why is that good? I can spend more time working the game. And why is that good? You, the heroes, and the greatest hero Stephen Colbert, will be happier sooner. So today we should all take a moment to enjoy the holiday Rosh Hashanah because it has helped the Colbert Report. And anything that helps the Colbert Report helps America. Thank you, whoever invented Rosh Hashanah. Also, when you next invent something, make it easier to spell.
Well, as for the daily game info, I would like to list the current stages I have in mind:
-New York
-Canton
-Canada
-Colbert County Museum
-Saginaw Spirit Stadium
-Daily Show HQ
-Green Screen Room
-Distant Alien Planet

New stages may be added, and some these mentioned may not make it into the game. Do you have any suggestions for a place where you would like to play as Stephen Colbert and fight bears and the like? Feel free to suggest anything at all at the Colboard. Or, if you prefer e-mailing any suggestions to me, that's fine as well. Send any suggestions to SquirrelMG@colbertreportgame.tk and be sure to mention the Colbert Report Video Game in the subject.

-Still Monday, September 29, 2008-

Golly gee. I had no idea you couldn't even read the topic at the Colboard unless you were or are a member of the Colbert Nation. Oh well. You can sign up to join quickly and easily to the Colboard by clicking here. I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but I'm mostly sure that your reaching this site means either that you are already a member of the Nation or wouldn't mind becoming one. By the way, you can learn why I had to make this website if you read the legal info on the sign up page. There is no way I could legally produce, and host, this game at the Colbert Nation, but I soon discovered the nice loophole of making a separate website! Genius, no?

-Monday, September 29, 2008-

Since Stephen's sprites are complete at this time, I have begun to work on some enemies he will face. I have had some trouble thinking of good foes (bears and robots are a given), so I've been watching the Threat Down a lot, looking for stuff that I'm sure Stephen would love slaying with a lightsaber. Currently, here are my ideas (by the way, if you'd like to see another type of enemy in the game, be sure to tell me at the Colboard):
-Bears
-Bears who have gun skills
-Robot Bears
-iPhone (it has a Killswitch)
-Air Colbert (Was once a threat due to malfunctioning)
-Regular Robot
-Democrat Donkey (Yes, it's alive!)
-Pirate

I do feel that this list is a bit limited, so I'd love for some extra suggestions of enemies that can be in massive waves.

-Sunday, September 28, 2008-

A sketch story and plot for the game has been made. This isn't the official or finished plot of the game, but it will most likely be the base of everything. Here it is:

"After finishing his show one day, Stephen gets a sudden intrusion. All of his greatest enemies barge into the room! Because Stephen has nailed all of them in the past, they team up for revenge. They tell Stephen of an impending bear army they have unleashed that is headed straight for the Colbert Report HQ. So, quickly grabbing Sweetness the gun and an old lightsaber from the green screen challenge, Stephen prepares to fight off the bears (and other crazy creatures, too!) and to stop his enemies!"

Stephen Colbert's enemies include, but are not limited to, Jon Stewart, Barry Manilow and the other emmy thieves, Gorlock, Rain, etc.
Did you want more from the story? Feel free to suggest what you'd like added at the Colboard.

-Saturday, September 27, 2008-

The image on the left is what Stephen Colbert, the main character of the game, will look like. I'm having trouble getting the image to loop but if you click the refresh button at the top of the browser, you can see Stephen in all these fun poses again. The image on the right was one of my considerations for Stephen's appearance, but I decided to go with the left one instead. Notice how Stephen has a gun and a lightsaber. The gun, of course, is Sweetness, who comforts Stephen in troubled times. The lightsaber is an old memory of the original Green Screen Challenge. Currently, these will be Stephen's two main weapons.
I should also take this time to mention that this game will be a platformer, similar in play-style to the classic Megaman video games from the 1980s. The game is still far from completion, but Stephen's sprites(graphics) are just about finished.
By the way, if you would like to discuss anything about this game, just head on over to the Colboard. Please offer any insight you have, there is nothing solid about this game, so all suggestions and ideas are welcome.

-Friday, September 26, 2008-

Hello, nation. Yes, this project is real. It is being made single-handedly by me, Michael Garofalo. Production has only just developed though, so Viacom has plenty of time to give me a cease and desist letter, and then the fun is over. But until then, I hope you, the heroes, will give me the support I need to support and entertain one of the greatest heroes of them all, whose name need not be mentioned, because you can guess who he is (Hint: Stephen Colbert). I hope this game is eventually completed and is good and successful, but, most of all, I hope that I don't get sued. Thank you.