Solid Snake= Awesome!

Brandon Auman

9/30/08

In the course of human events, there rises one man, who is far superior to all other men. In recent years many have claimed this one man to be Chuck Norris. I argue that it is Solid Snake, not Chuck Norris, is that men of men. Solid Snake is often seen sneaking around in cardboard boxes, and stabbing people when they least expect it. Wait, no, come to think of it, Snake is never seen in his cardboard box. That is one of the many reasons why he far superior to Chuck Norris.

Solid Snake, a former CIA agent of the U.S. government, has had many years of stealth combat action. He is the man for any job involving the infiltration of an enemy position, and the total destruction of all the enemies combat resources. Snake has destroyed no less then nine, that’s right nine, nuclear equipped walking battle tanks! A feat Chuck Norris can not even come close to. His success in these missions has been thanks to his awesome and very lethal sneaking ability. If Snake willed it, he could kill you before you even knew someone else was in the room with you.

Those nuclear equipped battle tanks I mentioned are called Metal Gear’s. A Metal Gear is a bi-pedal tank that has the ability to launch a nuclear missile from anywhere on the planet, from any terrain, to any other point on the globe. Metal Gear’s are heavily guarded and stashed in government controlled military bases from around the world. With that in mind, take into account Snake as destroyed nine of them. That is the single most impressive feat since Jesus walked on water.

Now, I can see why people say Chuck Norris is the man. It does take a man of awesome strength to kick a tree in half. I must also mention that sneaking into Vietnam to rescue a half a dozen POW’s is not something to shake a stick at either. However; that is just another day at the office for our hero Snake. The downside to Snake is that he lacks the sheer power the Chuck Norris possesses, but what he lacks in strength, he makes up in agility. Snake has been seen dodging bullets where as Chuck Norris simply “eats” them, as the kids say now a days.

So now you can clearly see that Solid Snake is the better of the two men. Chuck has his strength, but ultimately strength is nothing when met with the agility, speed and deadly stealth action Snake brings to the table. Snake has been and always will be the best man to ever walk the earth, and when I am old and grey my grandchildren will still tell stories about how awesome Solid Snake was!

LSK and The Trail and Error of Women
Mood:  mischievious
Now Playing: Saying Goodbye by Sugar Cult
Topic: Story
    She didn't like him, LSK could tell, he always knew when people didn't like him. Whenever he was around she would glare at him. He felt like a stray dog in her presence. Treated with a mild neglect bordering on hostility. He couldn't explain why, but he felt something beneath her cold exterior. Something warm, a small ember at the bottom of a fire pit. Waiting for something to catch it so her warmth could spread. LSK had feelings toward this girl, she would more then likely never know, in fact she would more then likely never care to know. He still tried talking to her, give her signs of what went on inside of his head. She either didn't catch the hint, or didn't care. Milly had a mild dislike of most things, as far as LSK could tell anyway. She always seem to not care about anything then what directly impacted her life. She was never one to be open at much of anything and lived carefree in her own little attention requesting world.

     "What are you looking at?"

     "Oh nothing, sorry." LSK replied. In truth he wasn't even aware he was looking. He was lost in thought about things that could be and things that would never be, the were mostly the same thing. He shrugged it off and repositioned himself in his desk and faced the front of the class room. Ten more minutes until the long day was over. He gave a brief sigh and returned to listen to the teacher speak about the book they were suppose to read over the weekend. Professor Donaldson was an extremely monotone speaker. Whenever he would lecture, most of the class would fall asleep. In response to this, he took to speaking as little as possible and left discussion up to the students.

     "In the Inferno, we find Dante giving us a description of what hell might look like. Now what I want you to do as a class is get into groups and discuss his concept of hell and write down some of your own ideas for the next class." Professor Donaldson said. "And remember class, this will turn into your second major grade for the semester so I suggest you work nice and hard on this so that you don't fail, Dismissed."

     The class got up and pack their belongings. LSK picked up his stuff and moved over towards Milly's desk.

     "So, Milly, do you have a partner yet?"

     "No, why. Wait let me guess you want me to be your partner." Milly retorted.

     "Well if you don't want to, you don't have to. Although I know the book decent enough. We could write a pretty good paper. Who knows we could have some fun."

     She let out a sigh and continued to pack her bag. "Fine." she said after a moment of thought. "just remember that we are working on a project together, nothing more." She then turned and headed towards the exit.

     "Wait, how are we going to work on this if we don't set up a time to do so?"

     Milly laughed a bit and turned around. "Well why don't you go to the library and start, and ill catch up to you later." She proceeded to head towards the exit, and left the class room. LSK stood there confused. What was that girls problem he asked himself. "Well whatever, at least I get to work with her, who knows she might even have a soul somewhere deep inside." LSK put an extra emphasis on deep. He shouldered his bag and made towards the door. "The library it is then." He said with a chuckle. "This ought to be fun indeed.