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Ronald McDonald


Now..many believe that our ever smiling friend Mr McDonald is a nice guy. Forever providing generations with fast-food with endless enthusiasm and joy. Ever since i was a small child i always loved Ronald. As my friends watched him make happy meals that little bit more happier I saw something else behind his beaming smile. I saw a man dedicated to his job

Some time in 2004 scientists discovered salivia and urine samples in a McDonalds burgers at an outlet in Sweden. The McDonalds corporation began to fall. Sales dropped all over the USA and Europe. None of Ronalds magic tricks could bring in the customers.

Many accused Ronald of being the person responsible for the scandal....



McDonalds searched for a refreshing, new idea for there restaurants. The solution...popstar Justin Timberlake and his "Im loving it" campaign.

Ronald was destroyed. He bought a beach house in florida and went into hiding. He befriended a man named pedro who taught him how to make bombs....

Justin has taken away from him the only thing he truly belived in. He began drinking and made several attempts on his own life.


Ronald decided he had to do something...he had to take back what was rightfully his.... He set out to the nearest McDonalds restaurant in his friends car loaded with 8kg of Nitric Fertiliser and Plastique Charges. He parked the car outside of the restaurant and walked away.



Ronald managed to get no more than 200M from the car before it exploded. He was arrested within minutes of the initial blast by US marshals.



He was sentenced to exile in a Siberian Gulag where he remains to this day....the "im loving it" campaign still rolls over Ronald's magic.

Please help us stop this tyrant before its too late!