Things to do with your AOL Disks.
At a restaurant, shove one under a wobbling table leg.
Christmas ornaments (the more the merrier).
Give them to young children play with.
Room dividers for hamsters.
Air hockey puck.
Dog chew toy.
Destroy them - smash, burn, or run over to relieve stress.
Light switch cover.
Chinese throwing stars.
Incense burners (put stick in hole of disk hub and light the incense).
Put them on car windshields at the mall.
Hand them out as party favors.
Grind them up to make fake snow.
Give them as stocking stuffers.
Use them as elbow and knee pads.
Use them to decorate your aquarium and create Comp USA underwater.
Baby mobile. Fence (may need a few thousand).
A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun surprised by the question politely declines and gets off the at the next stop.
When the bus starts on it's way the driver says to the hippie, "I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you." The hippie says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery and prays to God. "If you went dressed in a robe and glow in the dark paint mask she would think you are God and you could command her to have sex with you."
The hippie decides this is a great idea, so that Tuesday he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun to show up. At midnight sure enough the nun shows up and begins praying the hippie jumped out from hiding and says. "I AM GOD! I have heard your prayers and I will answer them, BUT ... first you must have sex with me." The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity because she is married to the church. The hippie agrees to this and has his way with the nun.
After the hippie finishes he stands up and rips off the mask and shouts,"Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the hippie!!"
Then the nun jumps up and shouts, "Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the bus driver!!"
-Dazed and confused-
An 85 year old man visits his doctor to get a sperm count. The geezer's given a jar and told to bring back a sample. The next day he returns to the doctor with an empty jar.
"What happened?" says the doctor.
"Well," the old man starts, "I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left -- nothing. Then she tried with her mouth, first with her teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. We even called Evelyn, the lady next door, but still nothing."
The doctor bursts out, "You asked your neighbor?"
"Yep, No matter what we tried we couldn't get that damn jar open."
IM me if u have any better jokes