Damned

Damned
slashing your wrists-
the blood starts to drain
starting to go insane
just a little bit at first
you are at ease because you do not really feel the pain

Dripping down
drop by drop
you feel at ease
your emotions become neutral
and you realize humanity is just a tease

watching with your eyes
quaint in a sense
you become more empty
emotions are no longer so intense
you watch in wonder
thinking that this time it won't stop
it doesn't make it "ok"
it doesn't make it "right"
but it helps you deal with what needs to be dealt with
and it makes you feel so crazy,
especially when other people hate it
they want to fight
what is it of theirs?
the right to tell me what I should do?
They can't tell me what I think,
what I want
and what I feel
what is it-
what is the whole deal?dead inside,

dead inside,
dead inside,
this is how I remain

the blood continues to flow
and still I remain angry-
this I know

I dig the knife deeper in my veins
not even thinking that I should stop
no doubt about it-
I'll have scars once they start to heal
But what the FUCK do you care?
you don't even know how I feel...

-Sara E. Hamlin